Srsly? I received this junk e-mail today

[flex]

This is certainly the most imaginative spam e-mail  I've ever received.  I  just had to share it:

"You can RUN but can never HIDE

I want you to read this message very carefully, and keep the secret with you until further notice, you have no need of knowing who I'm, where am from, until i make out a space for us to see. The picture in my profile is not me i hacked this profile just to pass my message to you.

I have been paid $75,000.00 in advance to terminate you with some reasons listed to me by my employers, its one i believe you call a friend and follow colleague in your office and best friend, I have followed you closely for one week and three days now and have seen that you are a good person.

Do not contact the police or F.B.I or try to send a copy of this to them, because if you do, i will know and might be pushed to do what i have been paid to do. Besides, this is the first time i turned out to be a betrayer in my Job.

my colleagues has been in your state right now keeping eye's on every steps you make but on my searching about your contact email information i find out that you are a wealthy person,But since my data shows that you are innocent and I could make more profit out a double deal. then I called my client back and ask for your e-mail address. And as I write to you, now, my men are monitoring you and your every step.

Now, listen, I will arrange for us to meet face to face but before that i will need the amount of $45,000.00 and you will have nothing to be afraid of. I will be coming to see you determine where you wish we meet. Do not set any camera to or set up any tape to record our conversation. My employer is in my control now, you will need to pay $25,000.00 to the account I will provide for you before we can set our first meeting, after you have make the first Advance payment to the account, I will give you the tape that contains his request for me to terminate you, which will be enough evidence for you to take him to court (if you wish). then, the Balance will be paid later.You don't need my phone contact now until am assured of your compliance.

As I am writing to you now my men are monitoring you and they are telling me everything about you.

Now do you want to LIVE OR DIE? As someone close to you has paid us to kill you.

Get back to me immediately you get this mail.... gmail .com

Lucky you.

WARNING: DO NOT THINK OF CONTACTING THE POLICE OR EVEN TELL ANYONE BECAUSE I WILL KNOW. REMEMBER, SOMEONE WHO KNOWS YOU VERY WELL WANT YOU DEAD! I WILL EXTEND IT TO YOUR FAMILY, IN CASE I NOTICE SOMETHING FUNNY. REMEMBER I AM AROUND IN THE HOTEL NEAR YOUR HOME GETTING ALL INFO I WANT. DO NOT COME OUT UNTIL I MAKE OUT TIME TO SEE YOU AND GIVE YOU THE TAPE OF MY DISCUSSION WITH THE PERSON WHO WANT YOU DEAD AFTER YOU HAVE COMPLIED WITH MY DEMANDS, THEN YOU CAN USE IT TO TAKE ANY LEGAL ACTION."

LOL for days.

[gummybear]

Well that's unsettling!

[hisno1girl]

That's really disturbing.

I'm not one to scare really but that's scary.

[googled]

Even though it's spam, I actually WOULD forward it to the FBI. You're supposed to forward these sorts of money schemes to them anyway and this one is just freaky.

[Dig Ophelia]

Yeah, that's pretty freaky. I think I'd also report it.

And then I'd be looking over my shoulder for a few days after receiving that one. lol

[alexithymia]

Well then. I usually fuck withthe ones that call, but this one is pretty freaky. I'd be a little paranoid for a day or two.

[MixedBerryJam]

I'm not sure who you are supposed to report this kind of thing to, but I would report it and then not give it another thought. I wouldn't feel threatened seriously but I hope the can track the sender down and rip his damn balls off and feed them to some hungry ferrets.

[anyastroud]

.

[laurack]

What!

That's very .. creative?

[stellatheartist]

Jan 13, 2017 0:09:14 GMT -5 hisno1girl said:

That's really disturbing.

I'm not one to scare really but that's scary.

I don't think it's scary, as this person obviously has no idea who or where she is. However, if you mean it's scary how stupid people can be to try to make some money, I agree.

[cabbagecabbage]

That's all kinds of fucked up. It's obviously fake but I can imagine it being terrifying to some.

[W.T.Faulkner]

It's like an illiterate Liam Neeson wrote this.

[sandyapples]

I'm confused. Do you need to send them $45000 or $25000 before the first meeting?

[Aloe Vera]

That's unsettling. And you know some people will fall for this.
I can totally see my 70 y/o neighbor falling for it. Every year, he gets rid of his computer because he receives messages like this. He believes his computer has been hacked and wants nothing to do with it anymore.

[BaliHai]

Yikes.

[ginandjucie24]

That is fucked up. I would forward to the FBI.

[FastHands]

Jan 13, 2017 8:48:36 GMT -5 W.T.Faulkner said:

It's like an illiterate Liam Neeson wrote this.

*snort*

[amandakisser]

Jan 13, 2017 8:48:36 GMT -5 W.T.Faulkner said:

It's like an illiterate Liam Neeson wrote this.

I can't stop laughing at this.

I think it's scary, but mostly for people who aren't smart/experienced enough to know it's SPAM. Like, I can see my mom freaking out (she actually DID receive a death threat in email several years ago and called the cops.). Elderly, too, or someone with diminished capacity. I'd forward it to the FBI, too, just so they can get some communications out to the public to beware of these scams.

[mel]

Even though it's spam, I'd definitely be reporting it. To whom, I'm not sure, but I think someone needs to be aware of this.

I can't imagine how many people panic at receiving this.

[bugandbibs]

Oh my.

[chimera]

Our local area has a version of this going around via text message.

[jigsy]

I just watched the Black Mirror episode that had people being blackmailed into do fucked up shit...so this would have me thinking about anything that I had recently done that I could be blackmailed with, lol

[spinnaker5]

Jan 13, 2017 8:35:02 GMT -5 stellatheartist said:

Jan 13, 2017 0:09:14 GMT -5 hisno1girl said:

That's really disturbing.

I'm not one to scare really but that's scary.

I don't think it's scary, as this person obviously has no idea who or where she is. However, if you mean it's scary how stupid people can be to try to make some money, I agree.

Maybe I have a heart of stone or nerves of steel or both, but my eyes started rolling after the second sentence. 

Jan 13, 2017 8:48:36 GMT -5 W.T.Faulkner said:

It's like an illiterate Liam Neeson wrote this.

What about sending it back, copy edited, and cc: the FBI?

[flex]

I showed it to our controller at the office, and she's going to show it to IT.

[Deleted]

I hate that kind of shit.  But that one could be really scary to someone elderly or unaware.  

[flex]

Yeah, if "they" were really "watching" me, they'd give me a description of my truck, my license plate number, the names of my kids and my granddaughter, etc., etc.--now THAT would scare the shit out of me.

But I agree...this would scare the pants off of some people who don't know any better.

[notsopicky]

Jan 13, 2017 19:18:57 GMT -5 flex said:

Yeah, if "they" were really "watching" me, they'd give me a description of my truck, my license plate number, the names of my kids and my granddaughter, etc., etc.--now THAT would scare the shit out of me.

But I agree...this would scare the pants off of some people who don't know any better.

So what did you do with it? Just delete, or did you forward it on to authorities? (Jesus, that looks a lot worse typed out than it sounded in my head)

[flex]

I made a copy of it and gave it to our office's controller. We won't be forwarding it to the authorities. It's just spam BS.