Anyone here a "Motherless Daughter"

[flex]

This will be my first Mother's Day without my mom.

[mich1]

May 11, 2017 12:28:52 GMT -5 flex said:

This will be my first Mother's Day without my mom.

I'm sorry....the first one was the worst.  However, for me it happened about 3 weeks after she died so that might have had something to do with it too.

[cjcouple]

I'm sorry for your loss. I lost my mom almost 27 years ago and I can say, it has gotten easier with time.
I am not local to her grave anymore, but I like to honor her just talking to her whenever, wherever. Mother's Day is just a nice day to remember her laugh and her jokes.  I sometimes cook one of her recipes and tell my boys about her. I try to find comfort in my memories of her.

 
 

  

[emsumm]

Hugs to you. Mother's Day is really hard for me too. I'm lucky bc I'm a mom and am usually spoiled by my family, but I still
desperately miss my own mom.

[sarahsays]

((flex)) - That whole first year of holidays is shitty. I'm sorry you have to experience it.

[cleo29]

I am sorry you are having a tough week. I lost my father in an accident when I was really young, so I think I can understand a little bit. Honestly, Father's Day has never bothered me, but it was little things through the year, especially growing up, that hurt. Father/Daughter sports day at my school, for example, was really hard. My friend's dad took me with them, but it still stinks to see people have that person you desperately miss.

if you have not talked to someone, perhaps that would be helpful. Talking to someone not emotionally involved is actually a relief. You don't have to worry about making them sad/upset/angry.

I don't know... I like the idea of doing something that day in honor of her that you used to do with her. It is a nice way to remember something good. biggest hugs

[sushi]

This is my first mother's day without my gramma who was like my mom, especially since I lost my mom nearly 30 years ago. Mother's day always sucked in school, but time takes the raw away. The grief doesn't disappear, but it becomes gentler. Which is what you need to do for yourself: be gentle. We're inundated with mothers are awesome celebrate them don't forget messages at every turn that it's impossible to avoid. So, it's going to hurt, and we're going to cry, be numb, rage. All is ok. Which I know you know, but I always appreciate the reminder, the permission.

My MIL died maybe 5 years ago? We never celebrated with her so there's no experience I'm missing on this specific day, but I still miss her, too.

[btay]

Mother's day has been a struggle for me for years because of my IF struggle. This is the first year I'm also facing it without my mom. I planned a trip to CO to hopefully distract me but I already warned my friend that I'm going to need booze and tissues this weekend.

[Deleted]

Hugs to all of us who've lost our mothers. This is a very difficult holiday for many reasons. Treat yourselves with care and kindness!

[ooglie26]

Same here. My mom passed this past November. She was my best friend. My sister has her H and kids to spend the day with, and made plans. I'll be apending it alone, so will probably drive to IL to visit Mom's grave. I just want to fast forward to Monday.

Hugs and comforting thoughts to all of you who have lost your mothers or mother figures.

[5hole]

My mom passed in 2001, and like others mentioned, it's not the big holidays anymore, but the day to day stuff that I want to share with her or talk to her about that's hard.

Hugs to all going through some tough emotions this weekend.

[jennistarr1]

Love to everyone! Especially, flex since we are in the same boat

[Linie]

I thought about starting a similar conversation yesterday, so thank you.

My mum died 32 years ago, when I was 14. She died on May 16. May has always been a difficult month for me, but MD has become more difficult over the years. Last year, I was on my first solo holiday after separating from my XH and I spent the day in bed ugly crying.

I'm also having trouble with the fact that I am now older than my mum ever was. It's so strange because I never really "knew" her as an adult, and still I feel now that I have somehow "lost" my role model. I told my partner that it feels like I'm flying solo now and that it can be very lonely.

For a while, her sister was my replacement mum, but she died in 2000. I sometimes feel myself searching for a mum figure, but that's not easy at my age.

I'm very close to my dad, but when we start talking about mum, everybody starts to cry after five minutes and I hate to make him feel sad, so we keep references to her very short.

I'm seeing some friends on Sunday, so I hope it will be a bit easier this year. What doesn't help is when you get flowers in shops because of mothers' day and I'm not even a mum myself! (by choice)

Hugs to all of you.

[boxertdog]

May 11, 2017 8:56:48 GMT -5 AutumnRose25 said:

My mother is alive, but we've had no contact for almost 7 years.

Mother's Day brings up a lot of conflicted feelings and grief/sadness for me, especially now that I have a daughter.

Big hugs.

Me too, but it's only been 2 years. I'm a mom now too so I try to focus on that and not read all the social media posts about from everyone who couldn't get through life / motherhood without the support of their mother. I have no idea what that's like.

OP- I lost my dad a couple years ago and Father's Day is tough. There's no right way to feel. Go easy on yourself.

[meganew]

I'm so sorry. Mother's Day is weird for me because while my mom is still alive and in my life, she didn't raise me- my grandparents did. It's always awkward trying to balance it out and celebrating her on that day just feels like a lie and wrong. There's no card for the relationship we have. Being a mom now does make it easier, but it's still not my favorite day.

I hope this weekend passes by quickly for you <3