Vent: DS got punched on the bus

[nicolewi]

DS (kindergarten) seriously gets along with EVERYONE. He's super happy-go-lucky and is friends with everyone in his class. Of course, the ONE kid in his ENTIRE grade who actually lives in our subdivision turned out to be the exception. Earlier this year we almost asked to have DS's bus seat moved b/c of incidents with this kid, but then it got better. He has been really mean to DS with almost no provocation--pinching, trying to "make" him play a certain game, telling him he had a super cool thing but wouldn't show DS, and yesterday punched him in the throat. DS said the other kid had a book on the seat between them and was turned the other way talking to some kids. DS picked it up and started reading it. The other kid then turned around, and DS looked up, and without a word he punched DS in the throat and then said, "You deserved that." WTF??? DS I guess just said, "If you do that again, I'm telling the bus driver!", but he was really upset about it. I talked to the driver today and asked that they not be seated together next year (assigned seats) and told DS just to stay away from the kid as much as he can. 

They have a family cottage near ours and wanted to meet up this summer sometime. Maybe it just "won't work out." 

[cjcouple]

OMG poor DS!! I would have asked they be moved immediately AND next year. No reason they cant move them even if it is only a couple weeks. Good for your DS standing up for himself.

[Deleted]

That's awful, I think you did the right thing. But seriously, your poor ds ☹️

[nowa]

Ugh-- that sucks. Do the kid's parents know?

[momin2013]

Man, I'm sorry that happened - your poor DS! I think both he and you handled it well. Hopefully they can keep them separated on the bus, and I think telling him to avoid the kid in general was a good tip.

[nicolewi]

The kid's parents don't know. I considered telling the mom but not sure I want to get into it. We had them over for a playdate when they first moved in, and the kid acted up a bit and was kind of wild but it was okay. Then they had our family over a few months ago. The kid was fine that time, but we weren't totally clicking and it wasn't really that fun. It just felt like work making conversation and we were judging the parenting on their little girl. She was totally sick with a bad cough and streaming nose and she was digging in all the snack bowls, taking some and dumping hers back, etc. Climbing all over the stools in a way that made me think she was going to fall, climbing on the island, not listening at all, and they were just letting it all go.

So...if we meet up briefly this summer maybe it would be okay, but it's not looking like we're going to be besties.

I think it's lucky he didn't have a better angle on DS. I don't think he got a lot of power into the punch b/c they were sitting side-by-side.

[CrazyLucky]

I would definitely tell the parents. If my child punches someone, I sure want to know about it!

[momin2013]

Yeah, with the extra info, I wouldn't feel inclined to hook up with them at the cottage at all; it doesn't sound like you really clicked anyway. Also, if it would cause your DS stress at all to have this kid around, it really wouldn't be worth it when he's supposed to be enjoying his vacation.

[lala]

I would call the school - the bus ride is part of the school day and they need to be aware. The discipline comes from them, there is only so much the bus driver can do. I would expect his seat to change immediately. Not next year. I absolutely would not hang out w/ a kid like that regardless of what his parents want.

[dizzycooks]

My kid would be way too busy to have a play date with a hold like that.