I feel like I'm slipping away. Pity Party, table of 1!

[hisno1girl]

I don't know how else to put it.

Finished chemo/radiation June 2.

First hospitalization: June 12-15. Appointments in between, second hospitalization, June 25. More appointments, more testing, third hospitalization, July 2-4.

I've been on antibiotics for most of June. I have a growth on my bladder and I'm being sent to the University of Michigan for a biopsy.

I haven been well at all. I still have the pain when I urinate. I have pain in my abdomen and shoulder/collar bone area constantly. Coughing, deep breaths, sneezing, etc., feels like I'm getting stabbed with a hot knife, oh, and of course, with all of the coughing you know what happens when you cough too much, so now I have to wear Poise pads.

I sleep anywhere from 8 to 16 hours a day. I haven't smoked much because the smoking sets off a coughing fit. I've lost another 10-12 lbs or so since the beginning of June. I don't eat much. I just move from bed to couch to bed.

I feel...spent. Just walking from one end of the house to the other leaves me winded.

I'm jealous of all the fun stuff I see people doing and I'm mad that I just don't have the energy to do anything.

There's a concert series we always went to and now, just walking from the car to our "spot" gives me jelly legs.

The worst part is that I had a coughing fit that really hurt and I was crying out and I scared the baby. She got this really worried look on her face and crawled over to me and laid her head on my shoulder

Pity Party, Table of One!!

#INeedHairPats

[W.T.Faulkner]

I will pat the shit out of your hair for the rest of eternity.

[pantsparty]

So many hugs, his  (heart)

[medicmommy]

All the hair pets to you! I think of you often!

[isabel]

I'm just so sorry, V. I wish I had comforting words, but the fact is that this is just really fucking shitty.

I am wishing you peace and strength.

[JayhawkGirl]

Hair pats galore to you. You are so loved.

[blondemoment123]

You can have all the hair pats you want. ❤️

[greenlight]

Oh, his. I am so very sorry.

[fryjack2]

I'm sorry

Would marinol help you at all instead of smoking? For the pain and nausea and appetite stimulation.

[janegold]

So many hair pats, and lots and lots of love.

[mom2twoboys]

You are so strong. I can't imagine what you are going through. You will constantly be in my thoughts.

[dizzycooks]

I'm sorry summer has been so tough for you. The fact you even try to go to the concerts is amazing to me. Do what you need. lots of hair pats even though I'm a small part of the community.

[lilafowler]

❤️💜❤️

[Eagles]

❤️❤️❤️

[pistolshrimp]

I'm so sorry his, the whole thing is really fucking shitty.

[nextbigthing]

All of the hair pats! You can have as big of a pity party as you want.

❤❤❤

[wambam]

Thinking of you, V

[wildfloweragain]

((Hugs))

Sent from my SM-G900V using proboards

[liverandonions]

Hair pats galore. You've endured more than your fair share in a short time. <3

[morecoffeeplease]

So much love to you his.

[shamrockshake]

(hug) (hug2)

[miniroller]

Oh dear His ❤️
Sending so many vicarious hugs. I pray for you almost daily (definitely will be daily now!). I wish I could hug you, dear friend. You deserve a pity party more than any one single person I know!!! I wish I could offer you better, but you are loved, thought of, & prayed for daily.

[orangeblossom]

Hugs and prayers.

[CloudBee]

Hugs and prayers for peace. <3

[bugandbibs]

Love and hugs to you. You have endured so much.

Mother Mary please wrap V in your loving embrace and ease her burden and pain during this time.

[flex]

Love you, babe! Feel free to let it all out--we're here for you!

[killercupcake]

<3<3

[eddy]

Big hugs

[themysteriouswife]

I can't say anything to make this better. I'll continue to send love and positive vibes for you.

[1confused1]

Hugs