Girl Parenting Help

[2chatter]

We are going away for the weekend. On the kids' agenda is the neighborhood pool. DD said she wants to go but can't. I was baffled. It's that time of the month. She's at camp all day, until after I depart. This has miraculously never come up.

I bought her light tampons (Tampax Peral)...but don't know how to remotely instruct her on use. Does anyone have time and interest in googling for an infographic or video? She will be down with that - I just want her to feel supported.

I plan to tell her to set a four hour timer on her phone to remove. Other first timer tips? I was in college before I tried this... but we swim 1000 times more than I did growing up.

[oldbaylover1024]

I think a video may be helpful. I'd search, but I'm at work and I think that may border on NSFW search. You could also tell her to check out the pamphlet that comes in the box. That's how I had to teach myself - my mom sucked at anything female-related.

Lights should be fine. Maybe toss in a few regulars if she thinks she may need them.

And the timer on her phone is a good idea. And this is kind of weird, but maybe explain that 'slipping' feeling you get when it's time to remove it. Just in case 4 hours is too long.

(I'm struggling to explain that feeling when a tampon needs to be removed.)

[k3am]

I used tampons during my second period at 13. My mom gave me pads originally, but after a disastrous soccer practice that scarred me for life, she plopped a box of tampons on the counter, told me to read the instructions, and I figured it out just fine.

I dread this part of parenting a girl. Especially since I don't use/like tampons but a cup is 289374298 harder to explain.

[justcheckingin73]

I agree that the instructions in the box might be helpful - that's also how I learned. Maybe also explain that they can't get lost and if she can feel it, it's not placed correctly. My dd has yet to get her period and I'm somewhat dreading it. 

[mae0111]

I learned by using the instructions on the box... but honestly was never really successful. I always felt irritated, so I'm sure it was never in correctly. Still, she'll probably be OK for now reading the instructions. It will get her through a few trips to the pool until you can help her in person.

I've heard that putting a little vaseline on the applicator and the end of the tampon can make it easier to insert? Does she have access to any?

[leap]

I also learned by reading the instructions on the box. It was kind of a similar scenario to k3am's only it involved swimming. I was 12 and had no issues. I have always much preferred tampons to pads and have used them almost exclusively since Jr. High. I think she'll figure it out.

[mellym]

My mom gave me pads to wear and it wasn't until several years later that I tried tampons. What a world of difference! I also learned by the instructions in the box.

[xctsclrx]

I learned from the directions in the box.

Tell her to never ever sleep in them.

Also, if the tampon hurts then she inserted wrong. I uh might have forgotten to take out the applicator the first time I did it. It hurt so bad, and now I don't use them.

[2chatter]

I am so glad there are so many box directions successes! I saw her at the camp production but decided against pulling her aside for instruction (ha!). xctsclrx omg what a terrible experience and I will mention that! This convo is going to happen while we are driving - with DH and another male friend in the car - but it's the only time our schedules overlap. I'm dying. And relieved?

[mommyatty]

Lol. My mom tried to explain it to me. I finally just said I understood, pushed her out of the bathroom, and used the box instructions. You really cannot talk someone through this process.

[k3am]

Jul 28, 2017 13:43:32 GMT -5 2chatter said:

I am so glad there are so many box directions successes! I saw her at the camp production but decided against pulling her aside for instruction (ha!). xctsclrx omg what a terrible experience and I will mention that! This convo is going to happen while we are driving - with DH and another male friend in the car - but it's the only time our schedules overlap. I'm dying. And relieved?

OMG. No. Who is the "other male friend?"

Please don't have this conversation in front of another male friend, be it hers or yours. She may never forgive you.

ETA: 13 year old me would take getting discretely handed a box and told to read the instructions over a conversation in front of other people.

[grover]

There was a post fairly recently on this exact topic on the Married Life board. I'll see if I can find the link.

pandce.proboards.com/thread/580229/teaching-dd-use-tampons

[akafred]

No males in the area. I remember I FREAKED out when my dad once said I had blood on my SOCK when I happened to be having my period. I started young though and was embarrassed for years.

My mom told me about tampons over a swimming situation, but again I was younger. I remember she tried to talk me through it. It was so awful. But once she told me that your vagina is at an angle and doesn't go straight vertical, it made all the difference and I could do it. IDK if that helps. I probably repressed the memory.

[polarbearfans]

She may need regular if she has a heavy flow. Lights don't really hold much and would have lasted me 30 minutes at that age.

[sdlaura]

Jul 28, 2017 13:10:25 GMT -5 xctsclrx said:

I learned from the directions in the box.

Tell her to never ever sleep in them.

Also, if the tampon hurts then she inserted wrong. I uh might have forgotten to take out the applicator the first time I did it. It hurt so bad, and now I don't use them.

Tell her never to sleep in them just because she's a teenager and new to using them, right? I've always used tampons and the only time I've ever worn pads was postpartum...so I sleep in tampons...My understanding is that as long as you're not sleeping 8+ hours without changing it, you're good.

[starburst604]

Jul 30, 2017 17:20:39 GMT -5 sdlaura said:

Jul 28, 2017 13:10:25 GMT -5 xctsclrx said:

I learned from the directions in the box.

Tell her to never ever sleep in them.

Also, if the tampon hurts then she inserted wrong. I uh might have forgotten to take out the applicator the first time I did it. It hurt so bad, and now I don't use them.

Tell her never to sleep in them just because she's a teenager and new to using them, right? I've always used tampons and the only time I've ever worn pads was postpartum...so I sleep in tampons...My understanding is that as long as you're not sleeping 8+ hours without changing it, you're good.

I sleep in them too, always have.

I also learned from the box, the second day of my first period when I could no longer handle the disgusting pad. I used my mom's super plus size at that - yikes. I still have no need for such a sizable tampon.

[xctsclrx]

I'm fairly sure the box says don't sleep in them, I'm not sure since I don't use them. But yes I think it is the eight hour window.

I vaguely remember someone doing a presentation about some sort of toxic shock syndrome. Caused by leaving the tampon in too long.

[supertrooper1]

Jul 30, 2017 21:47:22 GMT -5 xctsclrx said:

I'm fairly sure the box says don't sleep in them, I'm not sure since I don't use them. But yes I think it is the eight hour window.

I vaguely remember someone doing a presentation about some sort of toxic shock syndrome. Caused by leaving the tampon in too long.

There have been recent reports saying it is ok to sleep with tampons because they aren't the sole cause of TSS like once thought. But anything over 8 hours can create too much bacteria.

[kimberlybb]

This thread reminded me of my embarrassing foray into tampons. My mom never explained how to use them so I inserted the whole thing, plastic applicator and all. I’m embarrassed to admit that this went on for several months until a friend made an offhand comment which made me realize that you weren’t supposed to insert the applicator. Made a world of difference

[2chatter]

k3am, I was driving, DD was at home. The guys were engrossed in their convo. We'd never discuss in front of other people! Ha!

I went fine! She said "no big deal". Unreal.

[k3am]

2chatter, I was literally picturing the world's most awkward car drive ever.

[twinmomma]

Jul 31, 2017 10:22:09 GMT -5 k3am said:

2chatter , I was literally picturing the world's most awkward car drive ever.

Me too! I was mortified on everyone's behalf!

Glad to hear it went well 2chatter - you give all of us with younger daughters hope!