Ta-Nehisi Coats - why white people can't use the N word

[WOT?*]

Love this. I mean, it's obvious - or it *should* be - but I love how he lays it out.
www.vox.com/identities/2017/11/9/16627900/ta-nehisi-coates-n-word

[cookiemdough]

I still don’t understand why this concept is perplexing to people.

[Jalapeñomel]

I agree with 1234FIF!

My school is almost all students that are Latinx and/or from the DR, and they all use this word. All the time. I’m never really quite sure how or if I should address it.

[msmerymac]

On a related note, I saw him in person last week. Here's the podcast: libwww.freelibrary.org/podcast/episode/1662

[VillainV]

What I experience more is white people objecting to/not understanding blacks using the word. More like “If I cant say that, than nobody else should be able to either.”

[isabel]

Nov 11, 2017 8:34:23 GMT -5 Jalapeñomel said:

I agree with 1234FIF!

My school is almost all students that are Latinx and/or from the DR, and they all use this word. All the time. I’m never really quite sure how or if I should address it.

In a past life, I was a food and beverage manager for a country club. One of my (black) servers used the n-word in conversation with another (black) server. A third (black) server told me about it and how uncomfortable she was with it. I had a conversation with him about it and basically said, "look, you are welcome to use whatever language you like with your friends, but just like you can't cuss in front of the members, you also can't use that word at work." But it was incredibly uncomfortable to feel like I was the arbiter of when it is and is not appropriate to use that word because it's just NEVER appropriate for me to use it. 

It feels different to me (as a white person) to address the use of that word vs. your standard cuss words, you know?

[katfco]

Another reason white people have an issue with it is because they KNOW it’s a bad word. They just want to argue that in using it, black people are denigrating themselves. They believe black people are lower class and using that word justifies their beliefs. They want confirmation that their racist assumptions are true.

[rjamz]

My dad and I️ had a very similar conversation recently because he was upset that he heard some black kids using the word in the movie theater. I️ actually used the same “bitch” example - my female friends and I️ can call each other that, but if any man joined in we would fucking end his life. He actually understood.

But I️ think you’re all right - it’s about white people being told they can’t do something that black people can.

[bugandbibs]

I continually grow in my admiration of Ta-Nehisi.

I've always approached it from the concept of "that's not your word to use" and it has a different connotation when spoken by a white person. I like the comparisons he used in his piece and will add them to my talking points.