This was...interesting

[achase123]

So a guy friend and I have always had kind of a flirty type relationship. He's been crushing on me for forever and I've always been unsure about it, mainly because I'm not sure if I can trust him or not.

We made plans last weekend to go out this Saturday night. So we had the plans for almost a week in advance. Saturday morning he bails on the date because he said he needed to break things off with this other girl he's been seeing (I knew about her) and wanted to have a clean slate with me. I told him I was annoyed and disappointed. He was like "I'll make it up to you". The more I thought about it, the more annoyed I was. He should have thought about it sooner. He knows my situation where I rarely have a weekend without P, so it's not very easy for me to make plans. I also had a really strong inclination that there was WAY more to the story. Just a feeling. Then he texted me later on that night saying he missed me. Whatever.

He could tell I was upset so he called yesterday morning and we talked about it, he apologized for bailing, blah, blah. I just told him if he was really into me like he claims then the sequence of events wouldn't have happened. He was ass kissing for the rest of the day, asking if I wanted him to bring me coffee, etc.

The thing is, I'm just over it. I have no time for someone like that. I'm happy remaining friends, but he's obviously not relationship material. I just had to share, I thought the whole thing was interesting. It kind of backed up my theory that he likes the idea of me, or the chase, more than he actually likes me.

[bullygirl979]

He sounds like a dog. I wouldn't date him. Big red flags....

[Deleted]

Yea I don't think this is nearly as much about how much he likes you, but about how he treats women. Total bullet dodged.

[achase123]

Sept 17, 2012 10:47:35 GMT -5 @pdx18 said:

Yea I don't think this is nearly as much about how much he likes you, but about how he treats women. Total bullet dodged.

Agreed. I'm definitely not taking it personally! If he can't see how fab I am, too bad so sad! That sounded conceited, but you know what I mean.

[achase123]

Sept 17, 2012 11:06:40 GMT -5 dynamoo said:

Sept 17, 2012 10:43:55 GMT -5 achase123 said:

So a guy friend and I have always had kind of a flirty type relationship. He's been crushing on me for forever and I've always been unsure about it, mainly because I'm not sure if I can trust him or not.

We made plans last weekend to go out this Saturday night. So we had the plans for almost a week in advance. Saturday morning he bails on the date because he said he needed to break things off with this other girl he's been seeing (I knew about her) and wanted to have a clean slate with me. I told him I was annoyed and disappointed. He was like "I'll make it up to you". The more I thought about it, the more annoyed I was. He should have thought about it sooner. He knows my situation where I rarely have a weekend without P, so it's not very easy for me to make plans. I also had a really strong inclination that there was WAY more to the story. Just a feeling. Then he texted me later on that night saying he missed me. Whatever.

He could tell I was upset so he called yesterday morning and we talked about it, he apologized for bailing, blah, blah. I just told him if he was really into me like he claims then the sequence of events wouldn't have happened. He was ass kissing for the rest of the day, asking if I wanted him to bring me coffee, etc.

The thing is, I'm just over it. I have no time for someone like that. I'm happy remaining friends, but he's obviously not relationship material. I just had to share, I thought the whole thing was interesting. It kind of backed up my theory that he likes the idea of me, or the chase, more than he actually likes me.

I haven't read the other responses but in your shoes, I'd tell him that I'd like to stay friends only. That sucks that he blew you off for such a lame reason especially given that he knows you have a child and have to ensure care for him. If a guy is truly into you, he wouldn't have left you hanging like that.....A FRIEND wouldn't do it so someone who is a friend who wants more should be stepping it up. I wouldn't give him another chance. He will respect you more going forward - as a friend. Please don't give him another chance other than as friends.

You are a hottie with a good heart and SO much to offer - hell, you're a CFP now! ;D Don't settle, ever.

Nope, I agree. We will remain friends only. It's like I was telling my two GF's Saturday night over wine....I just have this amazing feeling about me now, since I passed my test. It's like I can do anything I put my mind too and I definitely don't need anyone holding me back. I have such a confidence boost and it feels GOOD!

[achase123]

Sept 17, 2012 11:35:04 GMT -5 mintchocochip said:

The whole situation between you two is weird and it seems as though you have a good thing just staying platonic. I'm of the camp that if things are too complicated, they're not supposed to work out. Sorry he was such a douche about plans though. At least you had a good time with your friends!

Totally agree with you, E. The thing is, we aren't even DATING, it shouldn't be the least bit complicated. Next!

[turtle1120]

I agree that staying just friends sounds like the best option. Next!!!

[wrathofkuus]

I HATE it when that happens. Some guy friend who was pursuing you like crazy gives you a kind of half-assed brushoff after you finally cave and give him a chance, and you're sitting here thinking "I didn't really like you ANYWAY, jerk!"

Ugh.

[achase123]

Sept 17, 2012 11:37:01 GMT -5 wrathofkuus said:

I HATE it when that happens. Some guy friend who was pursuing you like crazy gives you a kind of half-assed brushoff after you finally cave and give him a chance, and you're sitting here thinking "I didn't really like you ANYWAY, jerk!"

Ugh.

Haha, exactly! I keep reminding myself "I never really even liked him that way". It's fine, it just confirms that we're best off as friends and nothing more.

[stephbfan]

Sept 17, 2012 11:06:40 GMT -5 dynamoo said:

You are a hottie with a good heart and SO much to offer - hell, you're a CFP now! ;D Don't settle, ever.

This!
You dodged a bullet but I'm not sure why do you still want to be friends with him. I find him to be rather douchey.

[wrathofkuus]

Sept 17, 2012 11:40:06 GMT -5 stephbfan said:

Sept 17, 2012 11:06:40 GMT -5 dynamoo said:

You are a hottie with a good heart and SO much to offer - hell, you're a CFP now! ;D Don't settle, ever.

This!
You dodged a bullet but I'm not sure why do you still want to be friends with him. I find him to be rather douchey.

Yeah, I was too annoyed to be friends with the guy after this happened to me.