My daughter had a sesame seed which was a pain in the ass. Luckily she outgrew all of her allergies (peanut, egg, tree nuts and sesame seed). Out of all the allergies to worry about the seed one was the worst. It doesn’t have to be labeled and was in EVERYTHING.
We discovered her seed allergy when she was 1 and eating hummus and broke out in hives.
For a toddler room I would be SO thankful for that list to avoid because so many times they wander and grab food that isn’t theirs. Or touch toys before hands are washed, etc.
By the time she was in pre k, she took control of her allergies and knew never to touch other foods. She also outgrew some of her allergies and was only left with eggs and peanuts.
We've been dealing with a sesame allergy since DS was a baby. Hummus was also what confirmed this for us, prior to testing. But for as long as we've been dealing with it (4+ yrs) it's been a top 10 allergen. They must break it down and list it separately on food labels.
OP - I would shoot the daycare an email and ask if they can circulate a list with meal suggestions. A few months ago DS's school went sesame free. I think there are 4-5 kids with sesame allergies, and there are only 5 classrooms in the entire preschool. So that's a pretty high rate. DS has a sesame allergy and I was surprised when preschool changed their sesame policy.
For DS's classroom, I provided each parent with a list of foods which commonly contain sesame, and how to identify it on labels. He's also 1 of 2 kids in his class with an anaphylactic gelatin allergy. So we've also versed the class on what products to avoid when it comes to classroom celebrations.
When the school went sesame-free, they circulated another list of items which commonly contain sesame, and gave some alternatives. (A few alternative pre-packaged hummus options, and a recipe on how to make your own.)
As an allergy mom I hear you. It's hard to switch up diets. Especially with toddlers, when they are set in their ways and picky. So while I don't think the daycare's request is extreme - I get it. I would try and load up on protein at home. Check potato breads, bagels, and Hawaiian rolls. They are very protein dense.SaveSaveSaveSave
I think this is extreme. One thing I love about our new daycare is that they allow the allergen foods. The break the kids out at different tables for lunch and the kids with allergies sit together at a “safe” table without limiting what the other kids can eat.
You never EVER had a call from daycare claiming they can't find her epipen and to get there ASAP.
Our previous daycare allowed her allergen (oat in all forms) in the room, 3 "accidental" exposures within 6 months. One because the director said our note was a year old so she said to give a nutrigrain bar, yeah her face, hands were so swollen when I picked her up that I raised holy hell for not even giving her benadryl. We spent a night in the ER for observation. 2nd time was putting on sunscreen but they didn't change the gloves from someone that used Aveeno sunscreen, thankfully that jyst caused hives for two days. Third, the teacher gave her an oatmeal cookie because she was new and didn't read her tag, the allergen sheet, the food cart with the substitute that stated not to give it to her. Her face was swollen, she was labored breathing. That was another night spent in the ER. Within the next week, the director "was transferred", dd was moved to a new room where they just moved her to a special table but her allergen was still there and 3 year olds are messy AF and still unacceptable. We switched daycares because they didn't take her allergies seriously. They didn't allow her allergen in her room or surrounding rooms and no accidental exposures. She's been at new daycare just as long as the first one.
Plus the parents weren't understanding at the first one, one parent yelled at me because I gave "reindeer food" that was in her cubby to the teacher, "she isn't suppose to eat it", yeah that doesn't mean much when she reacts to touch. The parents also got mad because I bought cereal (cinnamon toast crunch) for my daughter and it wasn't fair because her precious wanted it. I mean this was a nut free daycare but dumb parents kept giving pb cups, pb eggs at whatever holiday in cubbies. One mom had a fit because almond milk is so much healthier than cow's milk that she didn't understand that it isn't allowed due to the no nut policy, "but it isn't a nut".
So no, I don't trust other parents to understand food allergies.
Thanks guys. I needed the reality check and recognize that I'm in a lucky spot since my kid doesn't have such limiting allergies. I'm sorry for all those on the other side, that's gotta be difficult and anxiety-inducing. As a PP suggested, I will become a part of this child's village and do my best to make sure he/she is in a safe environment.
I had no idea that sesame was such a common ingredient, that's good to know. I will reach to the director; I think circulating a list of common foods containing these allergies is a good idea.
Shady Brook Farms includes sesame in their Italian Style Turkey Meatballs. Like - WHY? It's almost as if they're going out of their way to include it unnecessarily.
Post by sandandsea on Mar 17, 2018 11:25:38 GMT -5
I do get it as our old daycare was very sensitive and my boys are both on dairy limited diets due to anemia. However the old DC was also lazier about keeping kids out of each other’s food and letting kids get up and touch things during meals and had all the kids sit together. The new place does a much better on of supervision during meals so the separate tables (broken out by allergy) work. I obviously would comply with the request but it is a lot to remember daily when it’s not your restriction. And I send leftovers too and would never think to check a meatball label to know I couldn’t send it.
My BFF's DD is allergic to eggs and dairy. She and my DS are the same age and BFF watches my DS 1x/week while I work. On those days I send no dairy or egg foods because they're toddlers (will be 2 next month), and love to share food. It definitely takes a village to raise kids and as part of her village I do my part to help keep her healthy and safe.
And, at my BFF's house DS eats stuff he won't even try at our house so think of this as a good opportunity to try new things with your DS scm1011 . :-)
Post by sporklemotion on Mar 17, 2018 13:48:07 GMT -5
Ours has a similar number, but different specifics. I’m fine with it, though I do wonder if some of the restrictions could be lifted due to kids aging out (at the risk of being flamed, I’m not sure how common some of them are and DD1, who has been there for for years, has had these restrictions the entire time, even though most of the kids from that time have moved on). If the allergic kids are still there or if these allergies are more common than I realize, then I think it’s fine to leave them in. We try to provide more protein for breakfast and lunch, and mainly focus on vegetables (peer pressure effect at day care) and pasta with cheese, yogurt, or tofu. It’s inconvenient, but inconvenience is less important than someone else’s health.
it’s an inconvenience, for sure, but it’s not unreasonable.
My child has a wheat allergy. It is not an anaphylactic response, luckily, but it’s enough that his preschool has to make some accommodations. I promise you, being the parent of the child with the allergy isn’t fun either. It’s something I have to think about every day in every situation. It sucks that my child can’t have the fun things that other kids do. It is expensive and thought-consuming for me. And I am constantly worried that the other parents at school are talking about how awful it is to have to make adjustments for him sometimes.
This issue seems to come up here every few months, and I just don’t understand how the preferences of one person should ever be more important than the safety of another - especially small children who can’t manage it on their own.
Honestly I'm kind of jealous that your daycare is making the room allergen free. I have had so much anxiety over my son's allergies and it being out of my hands while he's in daycare. Now at 3, he is very good about not eating anything that isn't approved by me. He also jealously guards his food and doesn't eat other kids' food.
My son's daycare is "just" peanut free, yet the other parents can't even seem to keep that straight. We got a valentine with Reese's Pieces (in an unmarked envelope, too, ugh). They've also had people send in granola bars etc with peanuts. It's really scary because although my son wouldn't eat it without explicit approval, his peanut allergy is strong and any exposure due to cross contamination or whatever could put him in the hospital or worse.
I am glad you're open to accommodating the request. Believe me, I know it's a pain and I hope you get in a groove with some good alternatives.
I don't think it's "unreasonable" given the consequence of allergy exposure, but yes it would be very limiting for me and my child, who is a vegetarian. She would basically be limited to dairy for protein, and without protein she has her own set of health and behavior issues, so I would struggle at least at first, but I'm sure if I discussed it with the teachers we would find some alternatives.
I would feel stressed out and burdened by a list this long, especially since that's not necessarily what I signed up for when I started the program. But if I otherwise liked the program, I'd probably try to talk to parents who are similarly situated (does your daycare have a FB page?) to brainstorm and crowdsource safe ideas and work through it. I don't think it's at all unreasonable to ban allergens from the whole classroom at the toddler level, and I imagine (hope) you'd respond more empathetically if the list were not so long.
In your shoes I would have really appreciated it if the notice about the change included some suggestions of safe foods to send so every family in the classroom doesn't have to reinvent the wheel. It would probably also help avoid some truly inadvertent mistakes from people not thinking/not being used to it/lacking some knowledge about ingredients in various foods.
I don't have a ton of suggestions though because I don't have to send food for daycare meals. Our daycare provides breakfast, lunch, and snack. We are nut-free, but allowed to send sun butter. I do send whole milk yogurt pouches every day for extra protein.
I don't think it's "unreasonable" given the consequence of allergy exposure, but yes it would be very limiting for me and my child, who is a vegetarian. She would basically be limited to dairy for protein, and without protein she has her own set of health and behavior issues, so I would struggle at least at first, but I'm sure if I discussed it with the teachers we would find some alternatives.
This is kind of where I’m coming from. He’s not vegetarian, but I limit his meat intake to a minimal amount.
I hear everyone loud and clear. I’m sorry if my knee jerk reaction to this triggered folks who have kids with allergies. I never said I wasn’t going to comply. Giving my kid a healthy diet is very important to me, and giving me a list of banned foods that contains essentially everything healthy he eats was jarring. Obviously a serious allergy supersedes that, and I’ll work out alternatives.
I don’t think it’s “unreasonable” but it would definitely take a lot of adjustment. Right now C’s daycare provides food, but if we had to send food, we would definitely have to brainstorm to come up with safe alternatives.
I feel bad for that family though, knowing that they have to make requests that are likely to inconvenience, or even anger others, when really they should just be allowed to focus on keeping their child safe.
I know you “get it.” This would be a good time to model empathy to your kiddo.
My DD isn't picky but doesn't eat a lot of meat either and dislikes most deli meats, so I would find this a challenge for protein too. She also gets bored really easily and prefers to have lots of different options. Cottage cheese? I hate the stuff, but my DD seems to like it and it's not as sugary as fruit-flavoured yoghurt. Tzatziki and pita? Tuna pasta? Will your kid eat meatballs (so long as the pre-made ones don't have any of the allergens of course)? Spanikopita? Quinoa with other veggies thrown in?
I do get it as our old daycare was very sensitive and my boys are both on dairy limited diets due to anemia. However the old DC was also lazier about keeping kids out of each other’s food and letting kids get up and touch things during meals and had all the kids sit together. The new place does a much better on of supervision during meals so the separate tables (broken out by allergy) work. I obviously would comply with the request but it is a lot to remember daily when it’s not your restriction. And I send leftovers too and would never think to check a meatball label to know I couldn’t send it.
Sorry, you don't get it. Your children won't die from exposure to dairy. You avoid it voluntary, not due to a life threatening allergy. There's a huge difference.
I do get it as our old daycare was very sensitive and my boys are both on dairy limited diets due to anemia. However the old DC was also lazier about keeping kids out of each other’s food and letting kids get up and touch things during meals and had all the kids sit together. The new place does a much better on of supervision during meals so the separate tables (broken out by allergy) work. I obviously would comply with the request but it is a lot to remember daily when it’s not your restriction. And I send leftovers too and would never think to check a meatball label to know I couldn’t send it.
Sorry, you don't get it. Your children won't die from exposure to dairy. You avoid it voluntary, not due to a life threatening allergy. There's a huge difference.
Agreed. If you haven't worried about how long it would take you to drive an extra EpiPen to daycare in the event of anaphylaxis, then you don't get it. Lucky for us, we are in a peanut free daycare. Despite that, parents have given my son peanut items for holidays more times than I can count. And several times we have asked teachers where his EpiPen is and they didn't know.
I get that it's inconvenient, but I promise this list is nothing compared to being an allergy mom.
I honestly don’t even understand what is so restrictive about the list. You can still pack a sandwich. A cheese stick. Some ham. Yogurt. I have a picky kid, so I get being concerned about ‘what will he eat,’ but I’m surprised so many people are handwringy about this.
I think it’s maybe because you’re looking at this this from a meat eating perspective. It’s a challenge to get protein without the food on this list if meat isn’t a part of your diet.
I honestly don’t even understand what is so restrictive about the list. You can still pack a sandwich. A cheese stick. Some ham. Yogurt. I have a picky kid, so I get being concerned about ‘what will he eat,’ but I’m surprised so many people are handwringy about this.
I think it’s maybe because you’re looking at this this from a meat eating perspective. It’s a challenge to get protein without the food on this list if meat isn’t a part of your diet.
Do you really think that many toddlers are eating meat at lunch on a regular basis? It sounds more like an excuse to me.
I think it’s maybe because you’re looking at this this from a meat eating perspective. It’s a challenge to get protein without the food on this list if meat isn’t a part of your diet.
Do you really think that many toddlers are eating meat at lunch on a regular basis? It sounds more like an excuse to me.
People are suggesting deli meat roll ups, sandwiches, and ham. So yes.
This is not directed at the OP, just a general statment for those who very clearly do not get it. Consider what it's like to have your child's well being out of your control for 8+ hours a day, knowing that one stupid mistake could kill them, and the absolutely crippling anxiety that can come along with that. I'm not being an asshole, I'm just trying to offer some perspective. Does it suck that other people have to make some dietary changes to help keep this child safe? Sure, but use this as an opportunity to have some compassion and honestly, some gratitude, that you're not the ones having to feel the shade on a daily basis from the parents that you're inconveniencing so that your child can be safe.
Post by JayhawkGirl on Mar 17, 2018 21:00:26 GMT -5
Dear friends of ours have a similarly long list of food allergies. I cooked for them often by focusing on Whole Foods - a meat, veggie, fruit, cheese (when they could have diary), and infused waters for fun drinks.
For main courses - hamburger cut up, deli meat (boars Head was usually safe), grilled chicken, taco meat, pot roast
Sides - rice, potatoes, veggies etc. some graham crackers (Annie’s brand)
Dessert - often fruit
Snack- lays chips were ok. Popcorn. Veggie straws. Pirates booty.
HTH. I hope the child is able to have fun and be safe from their allergens.
Post by icedcoffee on Mar 17, 2018 21:22:03 GMT -5
Broccoli, potatoes, tofu, and mushrooms are all vegan foods that are high in protein that you can play around with according to a friend of mine. Just something to think about...
Packing daycare lunch is the worst. I wish ours provided it!
Do you really think that many toddlers are eating meat at lunch on a regular basis? It sounds more like an excuse to me.
People are suggesting deli meat roll ups, sandwiches, and ham. So yes.
You specifically stated that he is not vegetarian, so yes, people are trying to help you out with ideas. You have had vastly more non-meat protein ideas than meat (yogurt, cheese, cheese sandwich, bagels, tuna pasta, quesadillas, quinoa, ravioli, etc.) At this point, acting like it's impossible to follow an allergy diet for one meal 5 days a week is not helping. Either use people's ideas or don't but don't act like they are the ones who don't get it.
I'm obviously an over-invested allergy mom so I'll step out now.
We do a ton of cream cheese and jelly sandwiches on whole wheat bread, naan, bagels, and whole wheat potato bread. (Chewy bread is higher in gluten, and thus higher in protein.) I don't use whipped cream cheese as it's not as dense and has some additives. I use the bars - and every week toss a new one into a pyrex dish so it's easy to get into and seals well. I use a tiny bit of jelly to limit the sugar.
Pita chips are also high in protein. The Trader Joe's brand, specifically. Their Hawaiian rolls have something like 5 grams of protein and no more calories than a traditional slice of bread.
DS goes in phases with meat. Sometimes he's practically a vegetarian, and others he'll eat a little bit of steak, meatballs, or hot dogs. Right now is not one of those times. We're pushing a lot of smoothies, trying cheese, and reaching for protein heavy carbs rounded out with a ton of produce.
He won't touch deli meat or anything that resembles it.
Sometimes I send cold pasta salads. For him, that consists of cooked pasta, cooked frozen corn, and topped with a handful of shredded cheese. If I'm lucky and he's in a meat eating phases, I'll dice a frozen (cooked) meatball in there, too.
Thanks for the perspective. I assure you I’m not going to be the asshole who sends these foods anyway, it was just overwhelming to essentially be told that I need to revamp my kid’s diet by Monday.
I guess this list doesn’t seem to be a big deal to some, but avocado and legumes are the only veggie/veggie-adjacent foods my kid consumes, and he gets the vast majority of his daily diet at daycare. I sympathize with this kids parents, truly, but I do wonder how they’ll function in public school, etc when these accommodations won’t be made.
I appreciate the food suggestions. I’ll do some further brainstorming this weekend.
This child's parents will be terrified every single day. They will work with their child and make sure he understands that he can never, ever, under any circumstances accept any food that was not specifically packed for him at home. They will make sure he has an epi pen with him at all times. They will make sure the nurse has an epi pen. And then they will still worry.
Honestly, reactions like this piss me off. I get that it's stressful to have to revamp what you send to school with your kid, but you may never know the fear that is a parent who has a child with life threatening allergies. I probably won't either. We are incredibly lucky. For now, his parents are doing what they can to make sure that he stays safe while he's too young to advocate for himself.
Protein is an issue in our family as well. DS1 will eat deli turkey, but pretty much no other meat. Ideas that don't involve meat:
Edamame Edamame "hummus" Fish sticks (not sure if you eat fish) Tofu Soy butter (could do this with jelly for a sandwich or use cream cheese/jelly) Cottage cheese Greek yogurt Cheese quesadillas
I don’t think it’s “unreasonable” but it would definitely take a lot of adjustment. Right now C’s daycare provides food, but if we had to send food, we would definitely have to brainstorm to come up with safe alternatives.
I feel bad for that family though, knowing that they have to make requests that are likely to inconvenience, or even anger others, when really they should just be allowed to focus on keeping their child safe.
I know you “get it.” This would be a good time to model empathy to your kiddo.
I was thinking, this is a good way to roll into a lesson about kindness/empathy (corny as it may sound). I’ve become friendly with the moms of a bunch of DD’s classmates. One of them told me that when she learned of DD’s allergies, she stopped letting her son have the peanut butter cereal bar he usually ate on the ride to school, so he wouldn’t touch her with that on his hands. When he protested she explained why, and he was so concerned. He wouldn’t eat them at all anymore, because he was scared that Lucy would get sick. That really melted my heart. Toddlers can be such caring and empathetic little people.
I apologize for being insensitive to the struggles of allergy moms. I appreciate the perspectives, and I’m sorry this is something you and your kiddos have to deal with daily.
The food ideas shared here are so so helpful, thank you!