Kindergarten Vent

[hermione]

C’s teacher is not returning after the December break. She got a new job closer to her home. I know she’s just as entitled as anyone else to look for new job any time she wants but I’m irrationally judging the shit out of her. AYFKM? Like kindergarten year isn’t already enough of an adjustment for these kids??? The petty in me wants to skip her Christmas gift now (note: I won’t so don’t bother flaming me). It just sucks all around.

[kath16]

I know this is a vent but this is... something.

[hermione]

Dec 9, 2018 21:50:44 GMT -5 kath16 said:

I know this is a vent but this is... something.

Ok.

[erbear]

Yeah, it happens. Sucks when it happens to your kid, but people change jobs all the time.

[cricketwife]

People, that’s why it’s a vent. Because it sucks when it happens to your kid.

[icedcoffee]

I get why you’re upset, but this is just one of those things you need to roll with. It happens. Teachers leave, they go on maternity leave, etc. It might be an adjustment or it might be fine. Teachers can’t really control when they get a new job just like we wouldn’t tell you not to take a new job just because you’re in your busy season at work.

C will be ok. I think the anticipation is the worst part.

[samanthamkm]

I would be upset too.

[lovetx]

Eh, as a Mom of a kindergartner I get it.

[hermione]

Considering she just got out of bed at 10pm to tell me how sad it makes her (again), which prompted this vent, I wouldn’t say she’s rolling with it. And I don’t think it’s at all like a maternity leave which the kids would have been prepped for all along.

But whatever, it’s a vent. Which I made clear in my OP. Obviously I know we’ll survive this.

[lo]

I would also be annoyed and wouldn’t feel bad skipping her gift... And I’m even a teacher! I would try to never switch jobs in the middle of the year, but never say never. You’re allowed to be annoyed when it’s your own kid.

[namasteak]

I wouldn't be annoyed that she is leaving because she has every right to find something that is a better fit but I would be annoyed she told the kids somewhat far in advance. They don't need to worry for weeks about her leaving.

[hermione]

Dec 9, 2018 22:18:54 GMT -5 lo said:

I would also be annoyed and wouldn’t feel bad skipping her gift... And I’m even a teacher! I would try to never switch jobs in the middle of the year, but never say never. You’re allowed to be annoyed when it’s your own kid.

LOL, I won’t skip her gift. I don’t have that in me plus we really like her - which is why this sucks so much!

[scribellesam]

DS1’s kindergarten teacher left a few weeks into the school year last year for another job (I assume higher pay but we weren’t given a reason). I’ll admit I was pissed. DS1 is on the spectrum so the transition was hard enough to begin with. He was sad and asked about Ms W for a few weeks but luckily his new teacher was great and it all turned out fine.

It’s hard to see our kids sad but don’t underestimate the resilience of little ones. I feel like most people who choose to teach kindergarten are already pretty special.

[lolo]

That's tough. Of course no one is blaming the teacher, but it can still be hard for the kids and even parents who have established a rapport with the teacher.

[dcn]

Oh man, that stinks! Of course she can and should do what’s best for her. But I’m sorry your dd is having a hard time.

I know it sucks now but I do think these things build resilience in kids.

We are approaching a move 1,500 miles away over Xmas break and my kindergartener is definitely working through it. We’ve written some notes to his teachers and friends and he has been drawing pictures a lot - of what he thinks our new house will be like, etc.

Maybe she could draw a picture for her teacher or write her a note? So far we’ve just been open to talking about it whenever he wants.

I hope the new teacher is a good fit and your daughter adjusts pretty quickly.

[minniemouse]

That stinks. I hope they find someone great to fill her position. Dd1’s first grade teacher came back from maternity leave right before spring break. She had been out all year and we loved the long term sub. It worked out fine. Some parents were really pissed off. How dare she not just take the whole school year off? Lol.

[abs]

I'm sorry. I totally get it and would be frustrated, too!! We had a similar situation in Kindergarten. DD started out the year with 2 teachers. Let's call them teacher A and teacher B. They job shared so each was there 2 or 3 days a week. I never loved the setup but it was fine and DD loved both teachers. Except teacher B was absent a lot. We had a sub for her a lot of them time. Then after Christmas break teacher B just abandoned her job. DD started hating school and would cry every morning because the sub after sub routine was getting to her. She had no idea what to expect and hated it. She still is this way...thank you anxiety. Once the school finally got confirmation that teacher B wasn't coming back teacher A was able to take over full time. For 2 months. Then a long term sub came in and we went back to a job share situation. Now luckily the long term sub was super amazing and DD loved her. She was prepared for first great and did great. It was really not a big deal in retrospect but was very stressful at the time.

Anyways. Chances are it will all work out just fine. It is okay to be annoyed though. A lot of kids--especially Kindergarteners--need that consistency. I know my DD would be super anxious about the situation. I hope the school is able to hire someone great right away and they will meet before Christmas break. That would help a lot!

[ssmjlm]

I'm sorry and as a fellow kindy mom, I get it.

We found out 2 days before school started that they had not hired enough teachers and the classes would be overcrowded. Right before Halloween they hired the 5th teacher, so kids got moved around. E didn't move, but some friends did and I know it was a transition for them after just a few weeks. I can't imagine after half a year. Especially since this was a choice, I think it's a bit different when you're moving because of work, such as military type moves.

[VillainV]

Dec 10, 2018 8:02:09 GMT -5 ssmjlm said:

I'm sorry and as a fellow kindy mom, I get it.

We found out 2 days before school started that they had not hired enough teachers and the classes would be overcrowded. Right before Halloween they hired the 5th teacher, so kids got moved around. E didn't move, but some friends did and I know it was a transition for them after just a few weeks. I can't imagine after half a year. Especially since this was a choice, I think it's a bit different when you're moving because of work, such as military type moves.

I think it’s important to remember that teachers, in many parts of our country, and paid and treated like crap. Our district was unable to hire enough teachers because they weren’t able to offer compensation packages that actually made it possible for people to earn a decent wage in our district. There are a handful of teachers who quit mid-year because they just can’t justify that much work for that little pay, or because the district doesn’t offer teachers enough support to do what they were hired to do — teach kids! I know we all know this, but it’s really easy to forget how bad it is in some areas. The key to fixing this problem is properly funding public schools, paying teachers and paraprofessional a decent wage, and focusing on instruction and enriching activities.

[ssmjlm]

VillainV, I get that, but in our case, they told us they underestimated enrollment and didn't have enough teachers. Per the PTA rumor mill, they didn't even know until a couple weeks before school started what the numbers were and didn't even start looking until a couple weeks before school started. So basically because they wouldn't let you register until summer, they had no idea what they were working with enrollment wise.

[redheadk]

Dec 10, 2018 8:37:54 GMT -5 ssmjlm said:

VillainV, I get that, but in our case, they told us they underestimated enrollment and didn't have enough teachers. Per the PTA rumor mill, they didn't even know until a couple weeks before school started what the numbers were and didn't even start looking until a couple weeks before school started. So basically because they wouldn't let you register until summer, they had no idea what they were working with enrollment wise.

It likely wouldn’t have mattered if they allowed registration earlier. This is how it works in many places.

Op, I totally understand why you are frustrated. My dd was in private K last year and her teacher left after the first week to go to a public school. Her dh lost his job and they needed the higher pay and cheaper benefits. Completely understandable but still a stressful situation! Especially given that our town had just been through a catastrophic flood in what should have been the first day of school and over 1/3 of the kids in the class were displaced from their homes. Luckily, the new teacher was even better and everything was fine. Dd had a great year.

As a parent, I would email the principal and ask what the plan is for a replacement teacher and how they expect to maintain a stable learning environment in the interim. I would continue to politely but firmly push until a teacher of record is established in the classroom. I have seen classes languish without a TOR for several months and it is not a good situation.

One more thing: I went to a graduation party Saturday for someone who will be starting her first teaching job in January after the break, taking over from a teacher unexpectedly retiring. She is SO excited. She is young, fresh, enthusiastic, and can’t wait to get her room in order and get to know her kids. It was pretty fun to remember what that was like and it’s a good new energy for those kids to have. So hopefully your dd will experience the same good experience these kids will probably have.

[pugz]

I'm sorry, I would have a lot of worries about this situation too! Kindergarten is a very emotional transition year for parents and kids.

[brooklyn]

I’m sorry. As another Kindergarten mom, I’d be frustrated too. I know my kid would struggle with that transition. It’s too bad she couldn’t wait out the year and start at the new place in the fall.

[outnumbered]

I understand your frustration. My daughter was a very anxious 5 year old and this would have given her a stomach ache. Usually the students adjust much more quickly than the parents. The students will happily adjust after the first couple of days and the parents will still be anxious.  

ETA: As for waiting out the rest of the year...that is not feasible.  Why should she wait?  That position she is taking would be filled.

[babybuffalo]

Dec 10, 2018 8:02:09 GMT -5 ssmjlm said:

I'm sorry and as a fellow kindy mom, I get it.

We found out 2 days before school started that they had not hired enough teachers and the classes would be overcrowded. Right before Halloween they hired the 5th teacher, so kids got moved around. E didn't move, but some friends did and I know it was a transition for them after just a few weeks. I can't imagine after half a year. Especially since this was a choice, I think it's a bit different when you're moving because of work, such as military type moves.

The vast majority of teacher hiring happens right before the school year starts. It’s a domino effect—a teacher leaves a position, leaving an opening at that school, which pulls someone from another school, etc. It can also be really difficult to put together a hiring committee during the middle of summer when many principals are off, all teachers are off, and so on. It’s just the nature of the profession.