@@ -- Let Grow Project

[redheadbaker]

Anybody heard about this? It sounds interesting. I downloaded the student handout with ideas.

letgrow.org/program/lgproject/

PROBLEM: Always helping our kids isn't always helping them. As kids' lives have become more adult-structured and supervised, their opportunities to solve problems and make their way have almost disappeared. The result? An increase in anxiety and depression. These social/emotional issues show up at home and in the classroom.

One way kids acquire the resilience and self-control they need to succeed is by doing some things, even negotiating some small risks, on their own. Most of us fondly remember playing outside, walking to school, and running errands. It felt great to be trusted and free!

But in our fearful culture, it is hard for today's parents to let go and...Let Grow. How can parents get brave enough to give their kids a crucial dose of independence?

SOLUTION: THE LET GROW PROJECT

The project is fast and straightforward: Teachers tell the students to go home and ask their parents if they can do one thing they feel ready to do that they haven’t done yet: Walk the dog, make dinner, get themselves to school…almost anything their parents did at their age. The kids can do this project alone or with another kid or kids.

[keyslover]

Looks interesting. I’m printing out the K-6 handout for my family.
I can see where my kids could benefit, we tend to be overly cautious sometimes.

[2curlydogs]

I am not the target audience for this. My 5 year old was helping me cut onions for rye rolls with an real knife this weekend.

I also have issues with (at least some of) their founders. Let's start with the fact that the Foundation for Individual Rights in Education is a right-wing org - "FIRE is a major proponent of the intellectual diversity movement which aims to dismantle the so-called liberal bias in higher academia." And I have issues with Lenore Skenazy as well.

[debatethis]

I can't believe we need a project to get five year olds to feed the dog.

[redheadbaker]

Jan 24, 2019 12:01:52 GMT -5 2curlydogs said:

I am not the target audience for this. My 5 year old was helping me cut onions for rye rolls with an real knife this weekend.

I also have issues with (at least some of) their founders. Let's start with the fact that the Foundation for Individual Rights in Education is a right-wing org - "FIRE is a major proponent of the intellectual diversity movement which aims to dismantle the so-called liberal bias in higher academia." And I have issues with Lenore Skenazy as well.

I didn't realize that -- thanks for sharing. 

[2curlydogs]

To come back to this, Lenore Skenazy loves to hide behind her cult of Free-Range parents, but she's basically a full-blown libertarian. Her theory of parenting focuses on parental rights, not children's rights. In addition to her more well-known efforts, she also routinely writes for Reason Magazine.

ETA: OOH! More fun on the founders page.

"Haidt is also founder of Heterodox Academy, an organization dedicated to ensuring viewpoint diversity to campus."

[waverly]

I don’t have a problem with kids doing more at home.

I was not raised free range and can never relate to those nostalgia articles about childhood back then. It just didn’t happen where I lived and I don’t have clinical levels of anxiety. I know just an anecdote but I am more inclined to think phone addiction and social media feed into the anxiety than lack of free range.

I read her and thought she was interesting but I didn’t realize that she as so far out there politically speaking. I should have because of the parents rights.

[mrsukyankee]

Jan 24, 2019 18:34:01 GMT -5 waverly said:

I don’t have a problem with kids doing more at home.

I was not raised free range and can never relate to those nostalgia articles about childhood back then. It just didn’t happen where I lived and I don’t have clinical levels of anxiety. I know just an anecdote but I am more inclined to think phone addiction and social media feed into the anxiety than lack of free range.

I read her and thought she was interesting but I didn’t realize that she as so far out there politically speaking. I should have because of the parents rights.

It's not so much the free range thing but more the ability to make mistakes and learn from them, to problem solve when appropriate. A lot of kids parents are wrapping them entirely in cotton and not allowing them to learn how to deal with things. You may have parents who were able to let you live and learn in other ways and so you didn't have that anxiety.

I agree that social media and expectations of kids (to do everything amazingly and the emphasis on always being good and happy) do play a role, but we also don't help kids learn to deal with it all either as we're trying to solve it for them.

[waverly]

Exactly. I was raised to make decisions and be self sufficient. Perhaps too much emphasis on safety but now I am a parent I get that. And was given responsibility at the appropriate ages.

I never roamed the neighborhood in my bike with a gang of kids and be home for dinner. That nostalgic view of free range just never happened. But I was raised to be independent and help out. Not told to wait here while mommy does everything for me.

[candreco]

Jan 25, 2019 8:26:28 GMT -5 mrsukyankee said:

Jan 24, 2019 18:34:01 GMT -5 waverly said:

I don’t have a problem with kids doing more at home.

I was not raised free range and can never relate to those nostalgia articles about childhood back then. It just didn’t happen where I lived and I don’t have clinical levels of anxiety. I know just an anecdote but I am more inclined to think phone addiction and social media feed into the anxiety than lack of free range.

I read her and thought she was interesting but I didn’t realize that she as so far out there politically speaking. I should have because of the parents rights.

It's not so much the free range thing but more the ability to make mistakes and learn from them, to problem solve when appropriate. A lot of kids parents are wrapping them entirely in cotton and not allowing them to learn how to deal with things. You may have parents who were able to let you live and learn in other ways and so you didn't have that anxiety.

I agree that social media and expectations of kids (to do everything amazingly and the emphasis on always being good and happy) do play a role, but we also don't help kids learn to deal with it all either as we're trying to solve it for them.

I know in our house some of it is just TIME.  It's a lot of small moments like when we're trying to get out the door in the mornings, it's faster to just put the shoes on DS rather than letting him do it himself at his own perfectly normal 5yo pace, or DD wants to help with dinner but it needs to be cooked fast and she still has hw to finish.  But enough of those little moments add up to a kid that has no sense of responsibility because everything is done for him.  It's something DH and I really have to mind ourselves about, and make ourselves take the time to let them do tasks at their own pace.

[mouse]

Huh. I was a free-range kid. Starting in 4th grade we all had bikes and rode them around until dinner or dark. During summer days starting in 5th grade, we'd go out trails by the Sacramento and scramble around in the undeveloped areas. Sometimes when no parents were home (usual state) we'd get together and make up our own recipes for cookies or whatever - generally did not turn out great, but we ate them anyway because if our moms found out we were wasting ingredients they'd be pissed.

But I still suffered from crippling, near nervous-breakdown depression in high school. Because my stepdad was an abusive alcoholic and my mom's coping mechanism was to ignore it all, including me. Because depression has a lot more to do with circumstances and genetic predisposition than whether or not you get to ride around until dark.

I'm sorry, I understand your intent, but the assumptions behind this claim are pretty insulting.

[2curlydogs]

I'm beginning to believe the "free-range nostalgia" is almost entirely white suburban bullshit.

[waverly]

Jan 25, 2019 11:56:23 GMT -5 2curlydogs said:

I'm beginning to believe the "free-range nostalgia" is almost entirely white suburban bullshit.

I agree. It’s like nothing bad ever happened.

I’m sure lots of kids had great childhoods being free range and that’s great and lots of kids had crappy childhoods and were free range. I just don’t see it as being super coralating. I think there is more research based studies that say the type of parenting (permissive, authoratative, authoritarian) and protection against childhood traumas have much more evidence based outcomes.

Is it good to teach your child to be more independent yes in an age appropriate and parent appropriate way.

[hopecounts]

Jan 25, 2019 11:56:23 GMT -5 2curlydogs said:

I'm beginning to believe the "free-range nostalgia" is almost entirely white suburban bullshit.

Anecdotal but I was free range.
My brothers and I would hang out in the woods behind our house a lot of the time after school and on weekends, we built a fort and everything.
Summers we’d go hang there most of the day it was my favorite reading spot.

Mom had a school bell on a pole she’d ring to tell us to come eat.

I don’t think it had any impact on our mental health but it was fun.

[2curlydogs]

Jan 25, 2019 16:31:50 GMT -5 hopecounts said:

Jan 25, 2019 11:56:23 GMT -5 2curlydogs said:

I'm beginning to believe the "free-range nostalgia" is almost entirely white suburban bullshit.

Anecdotal but I was free range.
My brothers and I would hang out in the woods behind our house a lot of the time after school and on weekends, we built a fort and everything.
Summers we’d go hang there most of the day it was my favorite reading spot.

Mom had a school bell on a pole she’d ring to tell us to come eat.

I don’t think it had any impact on our mental health but it was fun.

I was too. So were my siblings. And I consider it a miracle that all 7 of us are still alive and came home most days not-too-seriously injured.

But there was the time my brother broke his leg sliding into a piece of rebar playing soccer or baseball in a field out behind a neighbor's house.

And the time my sister got stuck in a tree trunk that she didn't realize was hollow when she was out rambling by herself.

And the time my brothers derailed a train.

And the time my two oldest siblings accidentally hung another sibling.

And the time the local farmers shot at my brothers and their friends for trespassing.

And the time my little sister ate the small little red berries off the yew bush.

And the time my brother accidentally hit me in the face with a 2x4.


I mean, we joke about this shit now as a family. But a different twist of fate on any one of those things could have been truly tragic.

[glw]

I was as well, and I'm a millenial. It was normal for my fellow rural/farm kids.
I don't know that it had an effect on my mental health, but I do think I was much more prepared for "adulting" than my peers in college.

[erbear]

Jan 25, 2019 8:26:28 GMT -5 mrsukyankee said:

Jan 24, 2019 18:34:01 GMT -5 waverly said:

I don’t have a problem with kids doing more at home.

I was not raised free range and can never relate to those nostalgia articles about childhood back then. It just didn’t happen where I lived and I don’t have clinical levels of anxiety. I know just an anecdote but I am more inclined to think phone addiction and social media feed into the anxiety than lack of free range.

I read her and thought she was interesting but I didn’t realize that she as so far out there politically speaking. I should have because of the parents rights.

It's not so much the free range thing but more the ability to make mistakes and learn from them, to problem solve when appropriate. A lot of kids parents are wrapping them entirely in cotton and not allowing them to learn how to deal with things. You may have parents who were able to let you live and learn in other ways and so you didn't have that anxiety.

I agree that social media and expectations of kids (to do everything amazingly and the emphasis on always being good and happy) do play a role, but we also don't help kids learn to deal with it all either as we're trying to solve it for them.

So much this. I teach middle school and have for 19 years. I cannot believe the difference in the parenting (and therefore in the kids) over even the last 10 years. It's insane. I have to have some version of "DO NOT DO THIS. YOUR KID NEEDS TO LEARN THAT (whatever happened, which is usually a poor quiz score, a friend was mean, or something equally minor) IS NOT THE END OF THE WORLD AND HE/SHE CAN MANAGE THIS" about 150 times a year.

[erbear]

Duplicate post, sorry!