July 4 TWERK

[librarychica]

Is it worth it? Let me TWERK it.

Cheers, happy Independence Day! Have a shot for every time someone says “it’s Independence Day, not the Fourth of July.” Yes, but it is also literally the fourth day in July, so chill. And TWERK.

[librarychica]

We’re just hanging out at home today and the girls and I spent the morning cleaning and pressure washing outside. My patio is clean and I was ready to sit on it and go swimming. So Florida says thunderstorm!

I bought the striped Amazon dress with pockets sandandsea recommended in the summer thread and I love it. Everyone should go buy one. Nice, medium-weight cotton, flattering, fits well (I feel like summer dresses are either too tight across my breasts or tent-like around my hips and this is neither), has pockets, perfect.

I continue to waffle on fix-or-replace on my car.

[waverly]

The car saga continues with him ordering a 2020 Subaru Ascent. Not here yet.

Camping trip booked. He wants to do 4 places, so setting up and taking down 4 times- kill me.

But my family is in the area so one of those days has to be a family day. Ugh so he is probably wanting to murder me. We ended up booking all places with showers but otherwise I was going to be like um we are coming to your place for showers. I guess we have a thunderstorm shelter...They are in a rental house.

Ya’ll my family has been texting me 18 million times about this trip, stressing me out sooo much. We had to book our trip to see what day we are available, so I can try to control the situation. Because if I don’t then they run rip shod all over us. DH has blamed me 10 times and I’m like no it’s my family they are crazy do you want to see the receipts i.e. 1500 texts?

Last year my mom drove me crazy about using her lake house. Nothing we do is good enough and my cousin left it a mess and I was blamed. This year we aren’t going, but now I’m getting the guilt trip. Cannot win.

[waverly]

Jul 4, 2019 15:41:34 GMT -5 librarychica said:

We’re just hanging out at home today and the girls and I spent the morning cleaning and pressure washing outside. My patio is clean and I was ready to sit on it and go swimming. So Florida says thunderstorm!

I bought the striped Amazon dress with pockets sandandsea recommended in the summer thread and I love it. Everyone should go buy one. Nice, medium-weight cotton, flattering, fits well (I feel like summer dresses are either too tight across my breasts or tent-like around my hips and this is neither), has pockets, perfect.

I continue to waffle on fix-or-replace on my car.

I got the dress too! I never got the land end keyhole one always recommended here. I am so pale- it would look better if I have a tan but otherwise cute.

[campermom]

Here's a new one. A poster on another board here posted about her tummy tuck. I've never considered this AT ALL before....but it got me thinking. And then I started spiraling on before/after pics. And looking at doctors. And downloading the Real Self app. And talking to people who have had one.

I believe I've mentioned here before that a lot of people ask me if I'm pregnant (when I'm not). In fact, I remember every single time because it's like....shame. I always throw whatever shirt or dress I was wearing away, and even though I ALWAYS tell myself that "next time I will make them feel embarrassed" when the time comes it's just so embarrassing that I try to lighten it up and end up trying to make everyone else feel better even though it devestates me.

It's happened 7 times total, and 5 have been during the last 3 years. Which is surprising bc the last 3 years is when I have been most active in my running and weight training and on the strictest of nutrition plans. Everything on my body feels toned except my midsection. I know it's 3 pregnancies, its just never going to go away. I want my body to reflect all the hard work and sacrifice that I put into it, and nothing will correct this except surgery.

So I discussed it with my H and I am shocked but happy to say that he is ok with this. I already brought my retirement plan contribution to 0 (temporarily) and am taking the same amount I used to put aside and I'm putting that in a savings account for a tummy tuck. I will still have to do a payment plan but I am hoping to schedule surgery in Feb/March. I have my first consult scheduled in December. Then I'll go back to my original plan.

Last year I gained 24 lbs due to anxiety meds, and since I made the decision to go off I am back down 14. I have 10 to go hopefully, that's why I'm scheduling the consult out that far. I'm not sure if they will recommend lipo, a mini tummy tuck or a complete.....but I'm almost positive it will be a complete. Most doctors I have researched do lipo along with the TT.

So, keep you posted!

[librarychica]

campermom, good for you!

[sandandsea]

Yea! I’m glad you like the dress too!

The tummy tuck post was so interesting. I told DH about it too. I couldn’t ever get plastic surgery myself but the results were pretty spectacular.

[rere]

#campermom good for you. If this is what you are feeling, then you go and get it! I think it is brave.

Still on vacation. Last day was amazing beautiful water, fireworks later. While vacation with older kids is a little better, mom doesn't really get vacation. I am still the organizer, sunscreen monitor, did you take your meds, do we have aloe person. At one point I had both hands full of shells and 3 pairs of sunglasses on my head. I looked like a weird bug. Ds got his meds and forgot the needles for his shots. So we had to stop 2 hrs into the trip. I let Ds and dd control sunscreen in the late afternoon on the first day. Ds literally put the spray screen a cm from his arm and has a strip. Dd missed her ear and on shoulder.

[sdlaura]

librarychica I’ve never heard anyone correct 4th of july to independence day! Everyone where I am says 4th of July.

rere, today was day 1 of our vacation with 3 kids 6 and under - so let me tell you it could be much much worse . The backpack leash has already earned its keep. DH is snoring beside me at 8:43 pm. We’ll see if I make it till 10 pm to watch the fireworks from our balcony.

[twinmomma]

I paid off half of my student loans today!
I honestly never thought I'd pay anything off early. I'm feeling pretty badass that I not only pulled it off, but did it while paying a mortgage and all the kid expenses. Apparently XH was some major financial dead weight.

[mae0111]

twinmomma - congratulations!! That’s amazing!!

campermom - I’m with you. Ive been seriously considering a CoolSculpting consultation. I could use a tummy tuck. Even when I was 10lbs lighter and working out all the time, 2 8.5lb babies with giant placentas that made the delivery room nurses say, “Woah. That’s huge,” just ruined my belly. But I’m unreasonably terrified of surgery, so I’m hoping CoolSculpting might work and be affordable.

rere - I just had this conversation with DH. We are leaving for a week at the beach tomorrow. I did not want to book it this year, but he’s been working so hard, so I said OK. After meticulously planning Disney alone, and prepping DD1 for 2 weeks at camp alone, DNW to plan another thing. He just complained about how much work this vacation will be for him and I gave him this look 😳

And then I unloaded.

It’s work for him while he’s loading and unloading the stuff. It’s work for me for weeks leading up, and the whole time we are there - activities, meals, beach packing, dishes, laundry, etc etc. it’s been like that for years. Perhaps he just thought all that stuff happened magically??

Another update: Things were not working out with DD’s therapist, so I’ve been trying to find someone else. After several rejections, I think I found someone. She seems warm, but no-nonsense, and will hold DD accountable for her actions and behavior. For the first time in a long time, I feel hopeful.

[rere]

Basically DH's responsibility is to drive there. Make sure there is ice in the cooler, drink beer on the beach, and fall asleep 8.

[campermom]

rere, I hear you. I feel this way about camping trips too. I do several tasks each day the whole week leading up to it. I've started making H do "thinking" tasks alongside me so he can see and appreciate it. Ex: he's about to lay down to relax for the night and I say, Oh, we still need to plan the meals so I can place the order. And we have a couple of lists-one for groceries, one for "bring this from home" and I make us both have our phones/tablets out so we can do them together.

Last week H was "in charge" of sunscreen when we went swimming. About 45 mins in I told DS (10) to reapply bc he looked like he was burning. He did, and then continued to look so bad that my dad asked if he could get a shirt from inside bc It was getting worse. Apparently, H let him apply it himself and didn't even check him. This is the part that pissed me off. I'm all for fostering independence but you need to monitor. And by that I mean not always me. We talked about it afterwards, all 3 of us. I made them admit that H should have watched him, and that DS should have listened when I said that really the adults need to help him. He complained of pain for a few days and I just kept reminding him that next time I ask him to do something (let us help him) he needs to listen. He agreed. But he's probably much more reflective on this experience than H was.

Uggghhh this reminds me that summer break is out on hold next week while the big kids go to camp, little one goes to daycare and I go to work for the week....and we leave Saturday for a weeklong camping trip. Ugh!

[soccermama]

Jul 4, 2019 15:41:34 GMT -5 librarychica said:

We’re just hanging out at home today and the girls and I spent the morning cleaning and pressure washing outside. My patio is clean and I was ready to sit on it and go swimming. So Florida says thunderstorm!

I bought the striped Amazon dress with pockets sandandsea recommended in the summer thread and I love it. Everyone should go buy one. Nice, medium-weight cotton, flattering, fits well (I feel like summer dresses are either too tight across my breasts or tent-like around my hips and this is neither), has pockets, perfect.

I continue to waffle on fix-or-replace on my car.

I really want to order that dress, but I'm not sure whether I should get the L or XL?!  Any input on sizing ladies???  FWIW, I am about 5'2 and would probably normally wear a Large (i.e. 12-14)

And which color did you all order?  I think I like the black or navy.....

[supertrooper1]

campermom , I can't wait to hear how it goes. It's something that I have considered too. mae0111 , I have also considered CoolSculpting, but I read reviews where people were in excruciating pain for a few days and it scared me.

I had a phone conference with my attorney. Apparently STBXH misreported his income to his attorney by $30K less and stated that was the reason why he was requesting spousal support. Not sure why he would lie about that when it's easy to prove with W2s and paystubs. He also thought I was spending savings behind his back when I closed out a CD. I was using it to pay the mortgage on the house that we both own that he was refusing to pay on. Good news is he is willing to release some of the escrow money from the sale of our land before we come up with a final agreement. It will ease my money concerns paying for rent and mortgage at the same time. I'm hoping my house sale will close on the 15th, but the buyer is being very picky with everything.

I had my 3rd date with the new contractor guy. He's pretty awesome. It's scary that in the 3 weeks we've been texting and after 3 dates, I can't find any red flags or anything wrong with him.   

I had a pretty good 4th of July. STBXH was ok with me sitting with him and DS at our town's parade. Then I drove to my hometown for their parade, throwing candy while my mom drove their 54 Chevy truck and my dad and nephew drove one of their antique tractors. I went home and walked a couple blocks to the water and watched my town's fireworks. Back to work today.

[waverly]

Jul 5, 2019 9:47:49 GMT -5 soccermama said:

Jul 4, 2019 15:41:34 GMT -5 librarychica said:

We’re just hanging out at home today and the girls and I spent the morning cleaning and pressure washing outside. My patio is clean and I was ready to sit on it and go swimming. So Florida says thunderstorm!

I bought the striped Amazon dress with pockets sandandsea recommended in the summer thread and I love it. Everyone should go buy one. Nice, medium-weight cotton, flattering, fits well (I feel like summer dresses are either too tight across my breasts or tent-like around my hips and this is neither), has pockets, perfect.

I continue to waffle on fix-or-replace on my car.

I really want to order that dress, but I'm not sure whether I should get the L or XL?!  Any input on sizing ladies???  FWIW, I am about 5'2 and would probably normally wear a Large (i.e. 12-14)

And which color did you all order?  I think I like the black or navy.....

I got the orange. I am a 6 and ordered the medium. I don’t know if the small would fit me but the medium is slightly big but still fits. I typically wear mediums though because I prefer my clothes slightly big as opposed to showing off my love handles. Could you get one of each size and try them both on and return one?

[librarychica]

Jul 5, 2019 9:47:49 GMT -5 soccermama said:

Jul 4, 2019 15:41:34 GMT -5 librarychica said:

We’re just hanging out at home today and the girls and I spent the morning cleaning and pressure washing outside. My patio is clean and I was ready to sit on it and go swimming. So Florida says thunderstorm!

I bought the striped Amazon dress with pockets sandandsea recommended in the summer thread and I love it. Everyone should go buy one. Nice, medium-weight cotton, flattering, fits well (I feel like summer dresses are either too tight across my breasts or tent-like around my hips and this is neither), has pockets, perfect.

I continue to waffle on fix-or-replace on my car.

I really want to order that dress, but I'm not sure whether I should get the L or XL?!  Any input on sizing ladies???  FWIW, I am about 5'2 and would probably normally wear a Large (i.e. 12-14)

And which color did you all order?  I think I like the black or navy.....

I would not size up. I read some of the reviews that made me think maybe I should but I ordered my usual size and it’s fine, even the slightest tad loose. Not so much that I’d go down a size but enough that I think going up would have been a mistake. I also got orange but may order the navy as well.

[waverly]

DH drives me crazy and also bad with sunscreen but he sets up and takes down way better and more than me with camping, menu plans, cooks, and does dishes or assists the kids doing dishes. If he just sat there and drank beer I am pretty sure I would have a screaming lunatic meltdown daily.

I did when the kids were little and I was the only one getting them ready every morning. That plus not bring a morning person. Luckily they dress themselves now. Dressing a toddler is ... not easy...

[sandandsea]

Jul 5, 2019 9:47:49 GMT -5 soccermama said:

Jul 4, 2019 15:41:34 GMT -5 librarychica said:

We’re just hanging out at home today and the girls and I spent the morning cleaning and pressure washing outside. My patio is clean and I was ready to sit on it and go swimming. So Florida says thunderstorm!

I bought the striped Amazon dress with pockets sandandsea recommended in the summer thread and I love it. Everyone should go buy one. Nice, medium-weight cotton, flattering, fits well (I feel like summer dresses are either too tight across my breasts or tent-like around my hips and this is neither), has pockets, perfect.

I continue to waffle on fix-or-replace on my car.

I really want to order that dress, but I'm not sure whether I should get the L or XL?!  Any input on sizing ladies???  FWIW, I am about 5'2 and would probably normally wear a Large (i.e. 12-14)

And which color did you all order?  I think I like the black or navy.....

I got an xl in orange. I’m 5’3” and normally a 12 on bottom and 12-14 on top with broad shoulders. It fits nicely. Looser fitted style so flattering.

[librarychica]

There are two things in our current life H is tasked with taking care of specifically, horse camp (bc he wanted DD1 to go and I told him at the beginning I didn’t have the time to drive her to the end of nowhere twice a day for 5 days) and his vasectomy (cause it’s his penis.) In the last twenty minutes he has texted me twice, once to ask a series of horse camp questions and the other to ask the name of the urologist he got a consult from 500 years ago.

......

Dude.

[mustardseed2007]

It's Friday, and I'm over the bickering. DH is normally in the middle of it. Over. Everyone.

[2chatter]

I just have to yeah that to the whole husband vacation is a vacation and vacation is not so much a vacation for me.

Actual convo with DH:
DH: I hope the food isn’t bad at this camp
Me: it will be awesome because I am not cooking it
DH: I just want to be able to do what I want to do and not be on their schedule
Me: I just am excited about a vacation where I don’t have to be cruise director, chef, provisioner, etc
DH: what do you mean?

He is clueless. He was annoyed yesterday at home as I asked him to make quesadillas for lunch. I asked when the last time he made a meal was and he could not remember the last time. I connected that back to vaca and he was like “but aren’t you used to all this?”

Ummm yes, I do eleventy billion things but that doesn’t mean I want to alllll the time. Hence, vaca. An actual no-cooking vaca.

[186momx]

I'm 99% sure I won't be enrolling DD in online school for 3rd grade. After lots of reading and talking with a few teacher friends over the weekend it is more of a homeschool with me being with her and helping with school 100% and just being told what and when to do things from the school. Not at all like the lady who I've been talking with who said I just needed to be present incase DD had a question and to check her in for her classes. DD is really upset with me because she liked the idea of doing school when she wanted but there is no way I can quit work to deal with schooling her.