I'm generally not a fan of "pick one/worst ever" questions.
Me too. I just had to sit through 2 days of team building stuff with worst/best scenarios and I'm still salty.
So I pick the day I became disabled. Changed my life upside down. Almost died but something inside me said it wasn't time yet.
And then there's the day of my engagement party. My fiancé hurt my feelings so badly that day yet I was so naive and couldn't fathom that a supposedly "good" person would treat me with such contempt. I still went ahead and insisted on marrying him. And I'm spending my 30s regretting my naivete so much. I have my kids but still. It's been almost 10 years and I still feel so hurt.
I'll just pick my 30s as the worst decade of my life (so far).
Post by georgeharrison on Jul 10, 2019 18:13:49 GMT -5
I haven't had anyone super close to me die. My grandma died in September, but she was 91, so it was expected...still sad, but I wouldn't say it was traumatic.
I think for me, I would say it was the day we found out that my H had cancer (Feb 12, 2018), but really, I think it was a few days later when he was in the ICU. His body was so traumatized from the surgery and how sick he was that he was just getting worse and worse and I thought he was going to die.
TW (suicide mentioned) The day my sister’s (now ex-) husband called to say that she’d taken a lot of pills and it was on purpose and I needed to get there now. I was at a track meet with my students and I just left. I drove two hours sobbing and praying and not knowing what to do. My husband (a paramedic) had to talk to me about what I was going to see when I got to the hospital room, which was good bc I was completely unprepared for seeing her intubated and lifeless. It’s been a rough road but she is relatively ok now. I’m so sorry for everyone else who’s had a much worse “worst day”.
Each time I hear about 911 calls being released, my heart always breaks for the caller. I would never in a million years want to hear my call that day. Hands down the worst day of my life.
I recently listened to a great episode of the "This American Life" podcast that just hit me. They had interviewed a man whos sister died in the WTC on 9/11, he talked about going through the memorial museum prior to it being open, and as terrible as it was to do that, the saving grace was that he was doing it with other surviving family members and that it would have been terrible to go through on a normal day, with tourists and random people commenting on pieces that were basically the worst day of your life. He thought about how awful it would be for everyone if each person had a museum dedicated to the worst day of their life, and had to watch people go through it - maybe they cared, maybe they didn't, maybe they would be respectful, maybe the would be bored and tired and cranky. And in the end, they could walk through a gift shop and purchase something to "remember" your worst day.
Listening to that was just striking. I don't know. I had never really thought about it quite like that.
I’m so sorry for everyone else who’s had a much worse “worst day”.
I try very hard not to think of my worst day in comparison to others’. I have also had many many good days that by far outweigh the bad (if such a thing can be said). It’s part of the rich tapestry of life, and quite honestly is part of the human experience. Lows, highs, and everything in between.
Post by underwaterrhymes on Jul 10, 2019 18:37:23 GMT -5
I have a few that stand out as the worst.
My mom’s rock bottom.
The day my sister was diagnosed with cancer.
The days my aunt Barbara and aunt Denise died.
The day my grandmother was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s disease and the months leading up to her death when my grandfather was caring for her and losing his own ability to live in the process and we were so sad to be losing her but also praying for her to no longer be in this abject misery that affected so many people.
We were prepared for my stepdad’s death and I can’t say it was a worst day when he died because it was Christmas and my children and husband brought me joy that morning even though I knew he was actively dying and couldn’t be 100% present and also we were so relieved he was no longer in agony, but the few days leading up to it when I was in Florida with him, and my mom, and my sisters were terrible and so loving at the same time.
Actually all of these moments were horrible but also filled with love.
"Why would you ruin perfectly good peanuts by adding candy corn? That's like saying hey, I have these awesome nachos, guess I better add some dryer lint." - Nonny
-The day my grandmother died. -The days I was in inpatient treatment for suicide ideation/attempt. I carry a lot of guilt about this one because I know it's likely on my mom's and dh's list of worst days. I hate that I put them through that. -The day I found out I was going to lose my pregnancy.
-The days I was in inpatient treatment for suicide ideation/attempt. I carry a lot of guilt about this one because I know it's likely on my mom's and dh's list of worst days. I hate that I put them through that.
I obviously can’t speak for your family, but the day my second H was admitted to an inpatient unit for suicidal ideation is actually one of the “better” days of my life. It was a turning point for him in finally starting to get better.
I dont have a single worst day, but separate events that spanned time.
- my almost divorce - when my mom was admitted, repeatedly, for taking prescription pills over a two week period. It changed everything about our past relationship and everything going forward.
The day I lost my mom. I was at work when I found out and I just sunk to the ground wailing. My coworker was with my until my best friend came to pick me up because DH was skiing with the boys. I was numb until I wasn’t and then it was even more horrible. God I miss her.
Yes. Getting a call at work that my sister was in the ICU at 24 weeks pregnant. She had lost the baby and was intubated and on the verge of death. They had to for e the delivery while she was unconscious. Oh, and it was her birthday.
The day my two best couple friends were hit head on by a drunk driver and a spouse from each couple died. The phone call still replays in my head daily. It happened while they were on vacation so I jumped on a plane immediately. My best friend couldn’t fly for a week, the other surviving spouse was in ICU and it was the worst week of my life.
They were on their way to a restaurant I recommended and I fucking wish I never told them about it. So many what ifs.
-The days I was in inpatient treatment for suicide ideation/attempt. I carry a lot of guilt about this one because I know it's likely on my mom's and dh's list of worst days. I hate that I put them through that.
I obviously can’t speak for your family, but the day my second H was admitted to an inpatient unit for suicidal ideation is actually one of the “better” days of my life. It was a turning point for him in finally starting to get better.
Thank you for saying this. I've never actually asked either of them how it affected them. Dh has been an amazing support system from day 1 and was by my side the whole time. My mother was in another state and had no idea I was struggling. Dh had to call her and tell her what was happening. I should probably talk to both of them about it. Maybe that will help me let go of some of the guilt. It's been 15 years...
Yes, but it’s nothing compared to so many shared here. Big hugs to everyone in here.
As I’m reading these responses, I distinctly remember being here with/for so many of you on those worst days. ”They” can say whatever they want about online relationships/social media, but man...in the tough times, I’m so glad this place is here. There is so much strength in knowing that we are not alone, even if it’s just internet strangers.
The day my father was arrested, hands down. And the shit storm that followed. It ruined our family forever. Followed by the day he died (almost two years ago), due to so much unresolved bullshit. Follow that with three years ago when I ran an ECG on my husband and he was having a heart attack.
Post by starburst604 on Jul 10, 2019 20:35:19 GMT -5
I’ve had hard and terrible days but I don’t think the worst day has happened to me yet. The deaths I’ve experienced have been natural, expected deaths like grandparents and older relatives. I’ve been around people experiencing tragedy but none of it was directly mine. I’ve been lucky with my health and that of my close family. This is something I actually live in fear of - that the other shoe could drop at any moment. I fear this more now that I’m a parent. I think I could get through almost anything except that.