Not kid related: help me not kill my H

[pooh8402]

He's quitting dipping tobacco (I know I know, it's disgusting). He's successfully quit several times before but always comes back. However he has always used like a gum or fake tobacco that has nicotine to help take the edge off.

This time, he's quitting nicotine altogether because it was shooting his blood pressure sky high. And he refused Chantix when the doctor offered.

So today is day 2 with no nicotine. I wanted to stab him 3 times before 7 am. I'm trying not to take his outbursts personal because I know he feels awful but I have already cried today and last night.

I did ask him this morning how he is feeling and he said he was edgy. He accepted my offer for some gum. I also told him that him feeling awful does not give him the right to treat me badly so if he could resist the urge to act like a dick I would appreciate it.

Edited for typo

[dock]

Solidarity. SO dips, and we’ve unsuccessfully gone down the quitting road in the past. I wish I could just wave a magic wand to get through it. I quit cigarettes cold turkey, and that colors my view of the whole thing (and his, frankly - he doesn’t understand how I could do it and he can’t).

I want so desperately for him to quit, but I dread going through what you are again.

[cactuscookie]

DH quit smoking when I first met him, and even though we were still all new and fresh, I distinctly remember it being rough.

He gave up alcohol last summer and gave up caffeine about a month ago, and it is also not fun.

[puppylove64]

Sorry. I’ve been there and it sucks. Keep him supplied with gum. Dh chews that shit like his life depends on it and I want to smack him for chewing like a damn cow, but I guess it is better than starting nicotine again.

[lindyanne]

Put the money he’s saving away in a jar and watch it add up and then go get yourself a massage with it

[pooh8402]

Dec 5, 2019 7:37:26 GMT -5 lindyanne said:

Put the money he’s saving away in a jar and watch it add up and then go get yourself a massage with it

I like this one!


I had a CTJ talk with him Tuesday morning and he's been better ever since.

[pooh8402]

Dec 4, 2019 23:22:10 GMT -5 cactuscookie said:

DH quit smoking when I first met him, and even though we were still all new and fresh, I distinctly remember it being rough.

He gave up alcohol last summer and gave up caffeine about a month ago, and it is also not fun.

I couldn't imagine giving up caffeine. I couldn't even do it for IF or pregnancy. I went half caff then.

[Mrs.flang]

That sounds terrible. DH hasn't been able to kick his smoking habit and it's so hard for me to have sympathy for it, so it sounds like you are handling it well IMO! I'd probably do everything I could to avoid him and let him have his own space.

I have a friend that quit successfully with Chantix, so that part sounds crazy that he won't try it! I think it has side effects with one of DHs other meds so he's not able to go on it.

[pooh8402]

Dec 5, 2019 9:01:17 GMT -5 Mrs.flang said:

That sounds terrible. DH hasn't been able to kick his smoking habit and it's so hard for me to have sympathy for it, so it sounds like you are handling it well IMO! I'd probably do everything I could to avoid him and let him have his own space.

I have a friend that quit successfully with Chantix, so that part sounds crazy that he won't try it! I think it has side effects with one of DHs other meds so he's not able to go on it.

It does have side effects that DH doesn't like, bad dreams, mental issues. He's tried Chantix at least twice before. It did help him quit, but of course, he came back each time. He's also tried Wellbutrin, didn't help.

I'm hoping this time it's for good. The longest he's gone without is like 8 months I think.

[pooh8402]

Dec 5, 2019 15:26:32 GMT -5 spearmintleaf said:

Cold turkey nicotine cessation is just not a good idea. NRT is way more successful and way less painful. Can you put a patch on his back in the night?

Kidding. Good luck, man. It takes a month to withdraw from nicotine and withdrawal doesn’t peak until 2 weeks in. Tell him to buckle up and just be quiet, I guess.

Girl. If it wasn't for his blood pressure issue, I would be okay with a gentler weaning, since he has done so in the past. However, it was high enough that I was concerned, and his doctor was concerned, and a NP friend of mine was concerned. It met the criteria for stage 1 hypertension and his bottom number average was like 3 points away from meeting criteria for stage 2 hypertension. Being that his aunt died last month of a hypertension related stroke, I'm glad this was the kick in the pants he needed to do a complete cold turkey quit.

ETA: my mom quit smoking cold turkey (I think she was half a pack a day) almost 13 years ago and she did well. She said the first 2 weeks were rough but she has not had a smoke since. She's been a good source of support.