twinmomma, I really hope you are documenting this and the fact that he isn't do school work with them during his time. He should be in constant communication with you about this. With details. I mean how hard is it to say her fever is at 100 without medicine, but when I give her Tylenol it goes away. I mean really or I can only get her fever down to 100 with Tylenol or Motrin.
I mean he can whine and complain to you all day about being so busy working with them at the house. Why not this.
xctsclrx, It's all through text message, so the time stamps are there to show he's not responding. It sounds like if he gives her medicine, it goes down to 100. No medicine, it spikes up to around 103. Beau is really, really upset for me that I'm not getting responses and have no real idea what's going on. It's his first real insight into what an ass ExH is so I think it's bothering him more than it's bothering me. He hasn't seen the behavior play out in person before now. I'm obviously used to this behavior after 15 years, so it doesn't really come as a shock to me that this is how he's handling it. Just thought/hoped that a global pandemic might slightly change his behavior. No luck.
twinmomma, Speaking as the spouse who watches my H's ex wife pull stunts very similar, It is really hard for us to standby and watch someone we love get hurt. I have learned that I can't engage with H when he is in vent mode because it makes us both mad and we don't want her influencing our relationship. Now I vent to my friends and my mom about her and am just the ear for H. Only 3 more years of active co parenting with her yay.
xctsclrx, Ya, I know he's just trying to help and offer up suggestions because he can't wrap his head around the behavior. He was asking if I could go around ExH to my ExMIL to get info and stuff like that, but it's not that ExH is withholding info directly from me, he's just a selfish jerk who can't be bothered to update anyone unless he feels like it. ExMIL isn't going to have any details either. So far we've kept the ex spouses out of our relationship for the most part and were both actively trying to not complain about them to each other, but it's obviously ramping up and becoming more of an issue with all that's going on now. We kind of ripped that band aid off and have been venting because it's helping our sanity.
Post by erinshelley21 on Apr 8, 2020 9:47:31 GMT -5
twinmomma I don't like to rely on technology a whole lot. Are you taking screenshots of the text convos? I'd do that and dump them in a google drive folder.
I agree with erinshelley21 to an extent. Mainly because searching through texts is a bitch. I'd at least keep a log so I'd be able to narrow down into a date if necessary.
twinmomma I don't like to rely on technology a whole lot. Are you taking screenshots of the text convos? I'd do that and dump them in a google drive folder.
twinmomma, you may have told me about Talking Parents, I can't remember. But it may be worth paying for the Talking Parents app since it records everything sent through there. It will now even record phone calls. And they can't be deleted.
I'm so sorry you're going through this. It might be worth going to his house since his communication is lacking on this.