Post by supertrooper1 on Jul 10, 2020 11:46:41 GMT -5
It's beau's birthday this weekend. He says he doesn't want to do anything special for it but he's already talked about getting a small group together to go dirt bike riding and maybe out to dinner with his mom, brother and son. I'm not sure how going out to dinner will work since we're still limited to 5 people in a restaurant. Maybe 2 tables. I went small for a gift, buying him a Garth Brooks hat and t-shirt that he had mentioned a while back. I'm still a little bitter about him not doing anything for Valentine's day or my birthday.
We’re getting together with the one other family we’ve been seeing. They’re coming here for pool and lunch tomorrow and then we’re planning to go to the beach Sunday together. Sunday may fall through though because they went to their fave beach this week and said it was too crowded for comfort. I suggested we just go to a different beach but I don’t want them to be uncomfortable, so maybe Sunday will just be our pool again.
DH is working on a project for DD’s new room (who knows when we’ll stop needing that room as a home office/when she might actually be able to move). He’s building a shelving unit to go under the ikea kura bed. He borrowed a table saw from our neighbor and I expect him to try to work on that a lot this weekend.
Headed back from vacation. We had a great trip. Kids spent a lot of time with their cousins. We rafted, hiked, explored, ate and drank. Our hotel was off the beaten path which was nice. We avoided town which was crowded. Mom was all about where to eat, but we mostly ordered pizza and grilled and had picnics in the park. We did find a nice lunch place outside by the creek.
Probably going low key this weekend. Dh goes in Sunday, so he talked about smoking ribs or something Saturday.
It looks like the cases spiked while I was gone and everyone is overwhelmed, so I am not looking forward to going back.
supertrooper1, Nothing for Valentine's or your birthday? lame! Your gift sounds totally fine to me, regardless, FWIW.
In between dealing with the restaurant opening, beau and I are celebrating our anniversary! I'm not entirely sure what that means - he told me he'd plan #1 and I can plan #2. So, we'll see what ends up happening between today and Monday.
Post by supertrooper1 on Jul 10, 2020 12:25:47 GMT -5
twinmomma , congrats on your anniversary! I do have to give him a pass on my birthday because it was close to the loss of his son. But his other son's birthday was a few days after mine and he made a big deal of it. I know it was partly to help with grieving. But there was no excuse for Valentine's day. He told me later that he took flowers to his late wife's grave on Valentine's day and not even a card for me. It's very petty of me and I know I need to learn how to deal.
FRIDAY! Yay! I had planned on today being slow, but of my 4 person team, 1 isn't working today, one can't log into the network due to moving related issues, and the other has cancer and is doing really poorly. Luckily the person missing and sick coworker are each other's backups and I don't have the set up to do their jobs so.. I will make it work and they'll come back to a mess on Monday.
DH and I are planning to go to happy hour at the new restaurant that opened by our house. They have a fabulous patio that we've enjoyed many times with the old restaurant that was there, and I'm glad to support a new/local business.
We don't have any official plans for the weekend yet, but it's supposed to be hot, so I'm hoping for plenty of pool time.
We are currently in planning stages.. we were supposed to be in Nuevo Vallarta the beginning of August, which we cancelled months ago. At this point, we could really use the vacation, so we're hoping to find a vacation house in driving distance. My only criteria are that the kids have a separate sleeping space and that we have immediately accessible water - beach, pool, lake, whatever. As long as I can be in it within 2 minutes, I'll be happy. DH's wish list is a little longer.
I always laugh at DD because she sees the neighbor kids EVERY DAY.. and then goes home and calls them on messenger kids. And now I'm laughing at us, because DH is currently looking for houses big enough to bring the neighbors with us on vacation..
Post by mustardseed2007 on Jul 10, 2020 13:01:54 GMT -5
We don't have plans for the weekend but we do have plans for next week. A friend is letting us use their lakehouse (they will not be there - it will be our family, my sister and my ILs).
There is wifi and I plan to work from the lakehouse so I'm not sure how much of a vacation this will be. When we rented a beach house it was easier because it included a weekend. In this case we're coming back on Thursday.
Anyway hopefully the kids have lots of fun and my sister and ILs can help us. That's why we're going.
Post by sandandsea on Jul 10, 2020 13:14:44 GMT -5
We are at a race this weekend and drove past a beach to get here and I wished we were going to the beach instead. It is so time and effort consuming, it’s exhausting. I feel super guilty because he had a race last weekend and ds2 and I weren’t allowed to go due to Covid restrictions and it was nice to have a quiet weekend at home. I also hate missing the races and worry about him the whole day if I’m not there so there is no good answer. Feelings are complicated.
Post by librarychica on Jul 10, 2020 14:07:03 GMT -5
My friends and I are brainstorming our school options. Our area schools probably should not be opening but they are anyway at the beginning of August and we all will have to be making decisions soon! My friends and I are looking at our own little home/virtual schooling co-op to keep our kids from dying from lack of social interaction.
That’s what our weekend looks like.
Otherwise it’s supposed to rain. My girls and I are doing a “spa and movie at home” evening. Cleaning/chores Saturday, maybe some work and family board games and then Sunday a friend is coming over so the kids can swim if it isn’t raining.
campermom, please make sure you tell friends IRL you’re about to have the conversation and that you’ll let them know when it’s done. Not to be alarmist, but he seems to be spiraling further out of control. It’s concerning.
Tomorrow DD turns 8. I’m delivering cupcakes and painting kits to 6 families and we are doing a Zoom party. Then Sunday we are having one family over to swim and be socially distanced for an hour or so. It’s supposed to be ungodly hot here so we are keeping it short.
We are headed back to reality tomorrow and Sunday. One of the best parts of the vacation is no internet. We feel the urge but we have to go to the lake like literally within 3 feet to have a signal, so it’s not often. The news is still terrible, but I was able to avoid for most of the week. Reality sucks. I want to live in a bubble forever but even here there is reality.
campermom- my advice is to get all your ducks in a row and tell people in person before saying anything to him. If he thinks this is it- it might get bad quickly and you need a plan first actually multiple plans. Sorry I’m a planner.
Saturday DD is having a grandma baking day which ends with me getting homemade pizza that DD will have made. We are having issues with our work bank and finally got an appointment tomorrow so have to deal with that at 11. DH is pissed off by this which I expected and why I waited until just now to tell him. I think I will spend the afternoon off by myself for a little me time. No idea on Sunday yet but guessing just hanging out at home.
We are having DS's birthday party tomorrow - it'll be the with same 2 families we've been hanging out with this whole time. The weather is supposed to be nice and hot, so I think I'll let the kids have a waterballon fight.
Can you do an in home separation? Separate bedrooms, no contact, don't make meals for him, run errands for him or any housework for him (laundry washing his dishes etc)
Schedule a time once a week to coordinate schedules and then whatever marriage counseling you are working with?
Not perfect, but a start? If he isn't willing to do anything to fix the relationship you need to be prepared to file for divorce. If that means moving you and the kids out because he is not going to leave then start lining up that option. Do not leave the household without your kids.
"Hello babies. Welcome to Earth. It's hot in the summer and cold in the winter. It's round and wet and crowded. On the outside, babies, you've got a hundred years here. There's only one rule that I know of, babies-"God damn it, you've got to be kind.”