Please, give me the lowdown. I have 6.5 month old twins. I never sleep trained my oldest 2 but I’m starting to feel desperate. I’m not open to extinction CIO at this time. I want to try something that’s more gradual, and TCB has come up a lot in my search.
This actually worked for us! I felt like I tried everything and I was exhausted. Full extinction did not work for us. My DS literally would cry for 3 hours at a time before I would give up and hold him until he fell asleep.
The gist of TCB is putting them down drowsy, if they cry, come back in 5 minutes, pat or soothe for 15-20 seconds. Then come back in 10 minutes, pat or soothe for 15-20 seconds, repeat at 15 min, 20 min, etc. Same for the middle of the night. Consistency is key. She gave a great analogy that stuck w me. She basically said the reason we gamble in Vegas is because although we lose time after time, occasionally we hit a win and that win keeps us at it. Same w babies, if you give in once and they win that one time, they’ll keep at it. That helped me stick to my guns when I wanted to go pick him up. It took about 3 nights before he got decent sleep and about 12 days before he was consistently sleeping through the night.
Good luck! The sleeping part of having an infant is so stinking hard!
Just saw you said you have twins! Same here...B/G! They’re 9 months now but I started TCB around 6.5 months too. That’s a looong time without consistent sleep!
Post by patches31709 on Jul 11, 2020 20:50:46 GMT -5
I did the method where you first sit by the crib for 3 nights until they fall asleep, then move halfway across the room for 3 nights, then by the door. I could not believe it worked - we did it at about 5.5 months. I had to start by getting her not to nurse herself to sleep, so first we switched to a small bottle for a few days, then holding her with no bottle for a few days. She was a great sleeper from birth, but the 4 month sleep regression hit us hard and she really needed the help. It has been amazing.
Post by dreamcrisp1 on Jul 12, 2020 0:23:56 GMT -5
TCB is the best thing I spent money on. I didn’t need the ABCs because I did the newborn class. But I have the best sleeper ever. From 8w old. Nothing impacts his sleep - traveling, moving, leaps, teeth, etc. He has been STTN since 6m old and only with 1 wake up since 2m old. I did purchase her abc class during a sale so I’d have it if I ever needed it. It’s a good class and she really walks you through everything. The best though is if you buy classes, you can email her team for questions at any time. I highly recommend TCB to all moms who struggle with sleep.
Another alternative that I also love is babysleepanswers. I follow her on IG and I really like her. Her programs are much more affordable.
I loved the Sleep Sense program with Dana Obelman. It worked great for both of my terrible sleepers to stop the waking every 45 minutes nonsense. We still kept multiple wake ups to nurse, but at least I could plop them back in the crib afterward.
TCB was the best investment we made in my child's first year of life. it saved my sanity and helped our marriage immensely. I can't recommend it enough. Yes, there is plenty of free reading you can do (and I did read that stuff). is TCB that different? No, but I think the analogies she uses in her videos and the bite size chunks of the ABCs really resonated for me. I needed an approach that was caring, full of love, and also consumable in bite size chunks as I am easily overwhelmed with too much info.
This actually worked for us! I felt like I tried everything and I was exhausted. Full extinction did not work for us. My DS literally would cry for 3 hours at a time before I would give up and hold him until he fell asleep.
The gist of TCB is putting them down drowsy, if they cry, come back in 5 minutes, pat or soothe for 15-20 seconds. Then come back in 10 minutes, pat or soothe for 15-20 seconds, repeat at 15 min, 20 min, etc. Same for the middle of the night. Consistency is key. She gave a great analogy that stuck w me. She basically said the reason we gamble in Vegas is because although we lose time after time, occasionally we hit a win and that win keeps us at it. Same w babies, if you give in once and they win that one time, they’ll keep at it. That helped me stick to my guns when I wanted to go pick him up. It took about 3 nights before he got decent sleep and about 12 days before he was consistently sleeping through the night.
Good luck! The sleeping part of having an infant is so stinking hard!
This sounds almost exactly like the Ferber Method which is what we used.
Consistency is key. Once we started, we used it for all sleep times (naps and nighttime and after overnight feeds).
Thanks to all who shared about TCB newborn/3-4 month classes! I am terrified about the lack of sleep with baby #2 on the way so I've been considering getting the bundle for the new baby and I think this solidified it for me! DD was just okay as a sleeper and didn't get great until we sleep trained at 10 months - I do not want to wait 10 months to sleep well again!
I've got an almost 2 week old and am in HARD for Cara.
It's still early days for us (so just practicing and adjusting) but we're laying a good foundation and avoiding developing bad habits right from the start.
I've had 2 friends highly recommend her so the additional raves here give me hope for sleep in my future!
I've got an almost 2 week old and am in HARD for Cara.
It's still early days for us (so just practicing and adjusting) but we're laying a good foundation and avoiding developing bad habits right from the start.
I've had 2 friends highly recommend her so the additional raves here give me hope for sleep in my future!
It will absolutely pay off. We started at 2 weeks as well for nights and 7 weeks for naps. He is such an incredible sleeper. I haven’t felt sleep deprived at all since he was under 2 months old.
I went a little OCD with baby sleep stuff and read EVERYTHING - Weissbluth (extinction CIO), Ferber book, the Precious Little Sleep blog/book, and TCB's blogs.
We ended up doing Ferber method (sleep training with graduated checks), and I've heard that TCB's "the ABCs of sleep" is basically the same thing. You can read all about the Ferber method for free online (and probably buy the book for cheaper than the TCB class).
This. ABC is basically Ferber. I liked having someone 'telling' me to suck it up and do it but I won't lie, I hated it since I really didn't want to do CIO (but ultimately needed to)
I've got an almost 2 week old and am in HARD for Cara.
It's still early days for us (so just practicing and adjusting) but we're laying a good foundation and avoiding developing bad habits right from the start.
I've had 2 friends highly recommend her so the additional raves here give me hope for sleep in my future!
It will absolutely pay off. We started at 2 weeks as well for nights and 7 weeks for naps. He is such an incredible sleeper. I haven’t felt sleep deprived at all since he was under 2 months old.
Can you tell me what you start doing at 2weeks old? I’m due with my second soon....
Congrats on the twins from another twin mom! My boys just hit 16 months. Big sis is 3. While I didn't do TCB, I started with just the Moms on Call app. Followed their schedule in the app for feeding and naps, and all 3 were sleeping really well pretty soon after. Of course, now we have teething twins and a threenager experiencing anxiety and nightmares since the stay at home order. (MOC does state that to completely follow their program you shut the door and stay out til 7 am. This was not something I have ever done. Except with the daughter when she was 2 and went through where she thought it was a game to come to poke us awake then run laughing. Super nanny return to bed did not work on this girl, but closing the door for two days did.)
Ugh, hold me, lol. I just did did CIO for the first time with my twins (6.5 months). I did it during nap since my schedule of stroller nap, car nap, followed by on mom nap, was getting ridiculous and they were only sleep like 30-40 mins at a time.
One twin cried for 10 mins and rolled over and fell asleep, the other cried then screamed and I went in at 20 mins and patted and shushed her for a few seconds and left. She screamed for like 2 mins, then cried for a few more and fell asleep. It’s been like 10 mins, so I’m hopeful they take a good nap...
Post by FishChicks on Jul 23, 2020 15:31:25 GMT -5
I'm also a twin mom and all I can say is that you're really smart to be doing this at this age. My DH refused any sleep training until I insisted at 12+ months. It took three hellish weeks, but once we were through it both kids were getting over an hour more sleep a day than before ST. It caused a night and day shift in my daughter, making her so much happier and more enjoyable to be around. I deeply regret waiting so long.
I recently heard of an app called huckleberry that tells you when your baby should be sleeping based on when they woke up and age and all. I haven’t used it personally, but all the sleep pages I follow always talk about the importance of wake windows for getting good naps so it might be helpful! Naps were def the hardest part of sleep for me.
I'm also a twin mom and all I can say is that you're really smart to be doing this at this age. My DH refused any sleep training until I insisted at 12+ months. It took three hellish weeks, but once we were through it both kids were getting over an hour more sleep a day than before ST. It caused a night and day shift in my daughter, making her so much happier and more enjoyable to be around. I deeply regret waiting so long.
I’m seriously amazed and so thankful it’s working for us! They’ve been sleeping 2 hours for their mid day naps and crying for less than 5 mins. Before this their norm was like 30-40 min naps and taking at least 2 hours to get down at night. I just put them down now and one didn’t cry at all and the other cried for like 30 seconds. The longest they’ve cried has been 20 mins, and even that was off and on. I’m too scared to believe that it was this easy, lol... l have to say that I don’t think this method would have worked or worked easily for DD2. She was a total beast. But what do I know!!!
I'm also a twin mom and all I can say is that you're really smart to be doing this at this age. My DH refused any sleep training until I insisted at 12+ months. It took three hellish weeks, but once we were through it both kids were getting over an hour more sleep a day than before ST. It caused a night and day shift in my daughter, making her so much happier and more enjoyable to be around. I deeply regret waiting so long.
I’m seriously amazed and so thankful it’s working for us! They’ve been sleeping 2 hours for their mid day naps and crying for less than 5 mins. Before this their norm was like 30-40 min naps and taking at least 2 hours to get down at night. I just put them down now and one didn’t cry at all and the other cried for like 30 seconds. The longest they’ve cried has been 20 mins, and even that was off and on. I’m too scared to believe that it was this easy, lol... l have to say that I don’t think this method would have worked or worked easily for DD2. She was a total beast. But what do I know!!!
That's fantastic progress! Even if they regress a bit in the future, you now know that they can fall asleep independently and stay asleep longer. I'm pretty sure that just knowing that's possible is half the battle!
I currently have an almost 5 months old and bought the newborn classes and 3-4 months classes. It worked for us. I like that this is adaptable to every kid and situation. She also answers a lot of the questions I had in her classes. For example, my baby hated to be swaddled as a newborn. After getting her classes, we went back to swaddling and my baby didn't care at all. Her advice really makes sense. We've been struggling with naps and she kept saying that it was OK if the baby only took short naps during the day as they aren't really able to nap well until they reach 5 months old. This lifted a huge weight off my chest. My baby would NOT nap unless she was on me.
I've got an almost 2 week old and am in HARD for Cara.
It's still early days for us (so just practicing and adjusting) but we're laying a good foundation and avoiding developing bad habits right from the start.
I've had 2 friends highly recommend her so the additional raves here give me hope for sleep in my future!
It will absolutely pay off. We started at 2 weeks as well for nights and 7 weeks for naps. He is such an incredible sleeper. I haven’t felt sleep deprived at all since he was under 2 months old.
Question: what did you do for day naps vs. nights?
DD is almost 6 weeks and we're in a decent night rhythm so I'm wondering what to strive for with days.
It will absolutely pay off. We started at 2 weeks as well for nights and 7 weeks for naps. He is such an incredible sleeper. I haven’t felt sleep deprived at all since he was under 2 months old.
Question: what did you do for day naps vs. nights?
DD is almost 6 weeks and we're in a decent night rhythm so I'm wondering what to strive for with days.
I think around 7-8 weeks, I started implementing it for naps. Until then, he napped on me for nap 2 & 3. Nap 1 in bassinet and nap 4 in bassinet. Around 7-8 weeks, I started to put him in the bassinet and worked on getting him to put himself to sleep. I also switched to EASY then.
Post by aliciabella on Aug 13, 2020 11:10:16 GMT -5
Not much to offer but commiseration. My twins are 6 and my dd 9 and I remember that first year which sucked. I don't know if this is an option but the best thing we ever did was to split them up at night. I took 1 and my dh took the other. They were always waking each other up but when separated slept much, much better. Good luck!