campermom would private kinder be an option? At least here, it’s roughly the same price. Our daycare has private kindergarten that is in person (and also distance learning support for virtual school) and if we’re in this same boat next year, DS will do private.
I’m kind of surprised that they’re recording. Our district forbids it and a lot of people voiced privacy concerns like yours as a reason not to. It sounds like a lawsuit waiting to happen.
I wouldn’t bat an eye at a 5yo having off behavior in an online class. I would be relieved that my kids are normal and it happens to all of us. And I would feel empathy for you because I would assume you know and are trying/have tried everything to help.
I also heard of another mom quitting (she’s a very experienced teachers tour school) because it was too hard for her husband to wfh and help with distance learning. Her daughter went from LoVIng school and wanting to be a teacher to a puddle of tears daily and hating it. I feel like this is the expectation and it’s driving me crazy.
campermom, if anything, I think the fact that you have a kiddo with the issues you help others with proves up that you really get what the kids, parents, and teachers are going through. Plus, you have two other kids without these issues. So obviously it’s not about your parenting. You have a kid who struggles. That’s okay. I wouldn’t take leave. I would opt out of having him recorded and get his Dx/IEP.
Distance learning is going well for us. It might help that I had a shit fit or three with the administration before it all began. DS would likely be doing better in school, but that’s because DH keeps babying him and helping him with things he could and should do on his own bc DH wants him to hurry up and finish so DH can go walk around Target and drop the kids with his mom. He says it’s because DS “won’t do it.” But DS won’t do it because he knows DH will do it for him. Like he was supposed to rip up paper and glue the pieces to make his name. He isn’t good at ripping paper. So DH ripped the paper for him. Wtf, DH? Knock that shit off.
I wouldn’t bat an eye at a 5yo having off behavior in an online class. I would be relieved that my kids are normal and it happens to all of us. And I would feel empathy for you because I would assume you know and are trying/have tried everything to help.
I also heard of another mom quitting (she’s a very experienced teachers tour school) because it was too hard for her husband to wfh and help with distance learning. Her daughter went from LoVIng school and wanting to be a teacher to a puddle of tears daily and hating it. I feel like this is the expectation and it’s driving me crazy.
The expectation that kids will be a puddle of tears and hate e-learning, or that moms have to quit their jobs during a pandemic to be good mommies?
If the latter, I think quitting a stable job during the pandemic might be a terrible move given the economic uncertainly of the time.
The only people I know who quit their jobs over this have been teachers. I know 4. And they quit because schools were going back in person and they weren’t willing to risk their own health or that of their families. Two of them were retirement-eligible and didn’t have kids at home. Two have kids they are keeping home with them who could have returned to school.
I have a few friends who are going part time right now, from full time. So they aren't quitting their jobs per say, but are scaling back to deal with all of this e-learning stuff. We are online through at least Halloween, dependent on the number of cases. I also live in a college town, so we are expecting a spike in cases (class just started at the university this past week).
Post by sandandsea on Sept 4, 2020 11:22:03 GMT -5
waverly the expectation that a parent (moms generally) quit their job to support distance learning. I heard of 2 more this week in our general circle....a coworker of Dh and a teacher.
Post by librarychica on Sept 4, 2020 11:23:32 GMT -5
I know one person who quit during this situation. Her H is deployed, they don’t need the income, she had a long commute and they have three young kids. Otherwise I live in a huge tourist area so I know a ton of people who were laid off or furloughed but no one who has quit. Many of my coworkers took leave of some form or another, mostly people with infants when the centers were closed.
I think my oldest is actually learning more at home. She can focus and move at her own pace and there isn’t the classroom shenanigans to deal with, but we are enrolled in an asynchronous program so there is less meetings times to coordinate and a lot more parents-as-teachers. It’s taking both of us and two grandparents. My K is definitely missing the interaction and generally little-kid-atmosphere of school. My dad and I are not especially effusive people. My mom is closer but H probably cancels that out with his strict Little House in the Prairie style belief in memorization as an instruction tool. I had to talk to him yesterday about drilling her endlessly in skip counting. I think he got the point because he turned it into a hop scotch game instead.
Post by sandandsea on Sept 4, 2020 11:24:34 GMT -5
I replied with a very nice note that we will remind ds to mute himself and that we finally got a second hot spot yesterday afternoon so hopefully the connection gets better.
Post by librarychica on Sept 4, 2020 11:29:44 GMT -5
I have two randoms.
We were offered an in-person slot for K at a charter school we really wanted Dd2 in. We turned it down. I blame general stress and my period, but I cried for 45 minutes.
I am kind of disappointed in some of my friends. I tried to raise money for a charity close to my heart that sends kids home with prepacked food on weekends/breaks or ATM distributes boxes. Our area has had 15-20% unemployment these last few weeks. Entire hotels are closing, one company laid off almost 3k people in 3 days. A major portion of our social is unaffected (employed, kids in private school, taking vacations). I doubled our usual $50 a month donation and invited friends to donate via social media post. I literally have never asked for contributions for anything though we generally sponsor friends kids and donate to bday fundraisers, etc. Crickets. Nothing. This is a dead-last in wage metros area (thanks, theme parks!), lowest unemployment per week state in the country. I feel that everyone we know who regularly forks over $12 a cocktail at hotel bars and $30 for toys at Disney could come up with $10 for the kids of the people who scrub Disney’s toilets and work those hotel bars.
I take that back: I am very disappointed. I just, idk, hope none of them were on FB this week.
I replied with a very nice note that we will remind ds to mute himself and that we finally got a second hot spot yesterday afternoon so hopefully the connection gets better.
I hope it works! That situation would have me out of mind frustrated.
Also I can’t believe so many school systems are using WebEx. WebEx! The worse video conferencing system! Ew.
I guess I went from full time to part time. I didn’t actually change my status. I just work to get everything in 4 days and on my 5th day that I am with e-learning I don’t do a ton of work.
We are slow though because we aren’t allowed to have a ton of people in the building nor are we having in person programming unless it’s outside. And obviously our time frame for outside programs is only about 6 weeks max before it gets cold.
librarychica- synchronous with their teacher is way easier than asynchronous with me (while trying to WFH) was in the spring.
waverly there is no 5 and up classroom at daycare anymore, all school aged kids will be doing their virtual learning there. He turned 5 just 6 days before our cutoff. Which works well for us, because although he will be the youngest, I feel strongly that the structure of K (when we get there) is what he needs as opposed to daycare. Also, he is academically totally ready so I wouldn’t hold him back. This am on the way there he wanted to practice one digit addition, verbally.
OMG found out that there is only going to be 1 adult for 15 kids with all different schedules, grades, even schools. I don’t even know how my child will mute/unmute or even get her to help him in that setting.
I emailed his K teacher to let her know about his daycare situation and asked if any other kids will be in her class from a daycare setting. So far he only has 15 in his class.
k3am I’ve thought about private kindergarten as well but I really think we will begin hybrid mid October here. At this point, if worse come to worse I can tell daycare not to force it maybe? Put him back in the 4 year old room and I will work with him? He won’t lose too much time.
I can’t believe they are recording either but in response to my questions about opting out, we have been notified (today, less than one business days before kids begin attending) that there are ways for teachers to record without students appearing in the screen. Thank you sweet baby Jesus. Maybe that means they won’t be on the screen live? Who knows.
sandandsea and waverly I wouldn’t quit, I would take leave from FFCRA until they went back in person. But I do hear about women quitting, or moms working from home with the kids but dads aren’t able to handle it. Im definitely feeling the tipped scales over here for sure.
We simply can’t afford more unexpected childcare. Nanny, pod, a second daycare for my daughter. or otherwise.
Post by librarychica on Sept 4, 2020 12:29:28 GMT -5
waverly, we are only able to do it because we are working opposing shifts and my parents are helping. Honestly, we have focus-intense jobs and young, rambunctious kids. I don’t think I could stay employed and supervise any kind of serious learning while working from home. I can’t split my concentration like that. I admire people who can, but in the spring I was doing light work while the kids were awake and then doing any focused work from about 9-1am. My colleagues are or were doing much the same. If we couldn’t have set up opposing schedules and asked my parents for help I am not sure what we would have done.
Post by traveltheworld on Sept 4, 2020 12:44:56 GMT -5
librarychica, that is dissapointing. I was reading an article yesterday about the current economic climate has produced some "super savers" - basically people with high income who haven't been affected, but whose spending has been cut drastically because there are no vacations/extracurriculars; but the money they are "saving" on are precisely the type of spending that keeps lower-income people employed. I had realized that on some level, but somehow that really hit home.
campermom- my DS is a little older (8 and in 3rd grade), but we have the same issues with emotional dysregulation and ADHD. He’s on meds and also in therapy and we are doing parenting classes to try to help him. And I’m actually surprised that the teacher is able to handle the remote instruction really well. Our school is using Zoom Which allows the teacher to mute and unmute students from her end. My DS basically refuses to keep his camera on and unfortunately that is one thing that the teacher can’t force back on, but she can request that he turn it back on in Zoom. So I wouldn’t worry too much about the muting and such. And I will say that seeing the other 8 year olds they are all screwing around regularly and have lots of stuff going on in their videos so I wouldn’t worry terribly much about what he’s doing while in class. In this situation all the kids look about equal as far as their ability to regulate and engage and all that.
I was really worried about the other parents seeing my DS’s bad behaviors broadcast into their homes. It hasn’t worked out that way at all.
I emailed the teacher again. Hopefully we get a response over the next several days... it's Friday and a holiday weekend, so I'm not expecting anything soon. Fingers crossed.
In amusing randoms.. DH currently has a handful of coworkers/neighbors over for pizza in the back yard. Apparently when they first went remote at the beginning of March (before SIP), it was cold and lots of walks were taken wearing work swag, and they all met that way. "Hey, is that a XYZ sweater I see!" and now they're all friends and do "stand ups" in the driveway with whiskey. These guys really miss their free food.
Post by mustardseed2007 on Sept 5, 2020 8:29:17 GMT -5
k3am, that sounds really fun actually. I can't even fathom DH meeting a cohort of guys by taking walks, that's so funny and cool at the same time.
We had meet the teacher this week and then two online days consisting of an hour of "tech camp" and an hour of "fun day friday" where they played ice breakers on zoom.
During meet the teacher in DD's kinder class it was carefully explained to us that (at least in kinder) the computer screen will not show other kids in the class for privacy reasons. Specifically so that other parents can't see what other kids do. However, they ha previously said for DS' class (third grade) that in person kids would get to do group stuff with virtual kids. So maybe they are being treated differently?
rere, if you saw friends last Thursday so 8 days ago, and they were sick 5 days ago (kid) and 3 days ago (mom) what would you do? At this point they have not been tested and don’t know if they have Covid.
I guess I was wondering if we could be asymptomatic carriers? But I don’t know if they saw other people after us. I know contact tracing would say 48 hours prior to their symptoms.
If I get tested I have to quarantine until I get results, so I’m not sure it’s worth it unless I have a known exposure, which I don’t. I don’t know if they have Covid at this point and they don’t know either. All I know is they are sick. Is there a polite way to ask for more info? Or should I just say hope you are feeling better?
You are outside of the window. I think I would ask if they are Covid positive to please let you know. Out of an abundance of caution, if they are positive, I would go ahead and test, especially if you have any contact with high risk groups. Do they have a known exposure? They really need to test with any symptoms.
Do you have access to rapid testing? Those take 15 minutes. Some of our other test are usually back in 1 to 2 days here. What is the mandate to quarantine if tested?. Here if you are symptomatic you have to quarantine until results are back. If you have a known exposure, you quarantine regardless. If you test just to be tested or to be cautious, we do not quarantine. waverly
To add, most people develop symptoms between 5 to 11 days with the average 7. I think it is unlikely that if your entire family was exposed that no one would have slight symptoms. You need to monitor everyone for any symptoms for 6 more days if no test are had.
Post by librarychica on Sept 5, 2020 10:03:26 GMT -5
@orangebird2020, I posted it through an app. I’ll bump it in a week or so when the campaign has been going on a bit. Thank you for the thought.
I don’t usually take this sort of thing personally! People have their own giving arrangements. Etc. Idk what got into me. It’s been a very emotional week.
Good luck with your work decisions. The same work/less pay is common and you’re smart to be aware of it. There were times when I was at 60% time that it was definitely the case!
Post by sandandsea on Sept 5, 2020 10:06:07 GMT -5
I agree with rere. Here you can do a test and get results the next day so I would err on the side of testing to be cautious. Also so many people all over have it now that I kind of expect to be exposed any time I go to get takeout or the grocery store. So we try to limit our exposure outside of necessary risks still.
rere, thanks! I knew you would be a wealth of knowledge. I think some of the rapid tests have been in short supply. It might be my work that wants people to quarantine if testing not public health.
I was thinking that too that someone out of my 4 person family would have symptoms. So far nothing outside our normal allergy symptoms that have been exactly the same since lockdown in March (I.e. non clinical level not even needing allergy meds). I will continue to monitor symptoms and our friend’s situation. And I’ll see if the rapid tests are back in stock.
Update: She was tested and was negative. Her doctor is very proactive and tests at any symptom. Assuming it was a stomach virus, but how did they get one when they were social distancing? Geez Louise, is my latest saying.
waverly- I wondered that when I was sick. One hypothesis is it’s something mosquito-borne, like bird flu or West Nile virus.
Interesting because the health department did say we have mosquitos that tested positive for West Nile. Is West Nile transmitted person to person or would all 3 family members have to be bit? They all had it starting with dad and daughter around the same time and then mom.
I think you can get the stomach virus from someone sick preparing food. So if they got, say, a takeout salad and someone handling the food was sick, it could be passed on.
Yesterday I came down with my annual Labor Day head cold, which is always post-nasal drip and overall feelings of stuffy/congested head and sinuses. No fever or coughing. I texted the nurse at my school asking what I should do in order to be able to return to work on Tuesday. I hope I don’t have to scramble to find a COVID test today or tomorrow. 🤦🏼♀️🤦🏼♀️
Nurse just texted back that I’m fine to come to work as long as I don’t have fever, cough, shortness of breath, or loss of taste/smell. So I’ll be sniffing all the things today to make sure I can smell them.