WWYD? Saw something worrisome

[felicity]

PDQ

DH and I went on a walk through a local park this afternoon. We walked by a guy and a girl sitting on a bench. The girl looked young, maybe around 16, and kind of awkward and shy. I heard her giggle and laugh and say something like "my mom wouldn't like that I'm doing this because I'm not wearing a mask." That's all I heard because we kept walking. The guy looked much older, I'd guess at least mid 20's and he could easily pass for 30. He was drinking something out of a tall can, but I didn't get a good look. It looked like a beer but could have been something else. 

The way she talked and her mannerisms sounded slightly special needs, but it could have also just been the moment I heard her sounded that way. It wasn't anything super specific, just the inflection in her speaking and a slight hunched, rocking sort of body language. At a minimum she was very immature sounding.  

My mom radar was going off when I saw them and heard her speak. I got a predatory sense from watching him with her. DH agreed that it seemed really off and concerning. We didn't know what to do, but we went back and got a couple of far away pictures where they couldn't see us. Then we left. We were scared to approach them and say anything. 

Is there anything you think I can or should do? Would you have said anything? Is this something worth calling the non-emergency line over? I'm second guessing myself, because for all I know I just heard an awkward moment, and she's older than she looks and sounds, or he's younger than he looks, and she just really cares about her mom's opinion. I don't have a lot to go on since it was such a quick moment, but I can't stop thinking about her.

[felicity]

Apr 4, 2021 14:54:43 GMT -5 mofongo said:

I can’t imagine what you could do now. Are they even identifiable in the pics?

Yeah they are identifiable. 

[sadlebred]

I don't think there is much you can do now. If your radar is going off in a situation like this, I'd probably call 911. At the very least, they can check it out. Sometimes when you feel something is wrong, it is.

In some states the age of consent is 16, so it may not be "illegal" even if it's not right. (The age of consent is 16-18 in the majority of states.)

[Deleted]

I don't think you have anything to go on really and even with a picture, have no info to give to the police i.e. name and address or even car info I assume?

[sadlebred]

Apr 4, 2021 15:02:23 GMT -5 mofongo said:

Unless he’s a know person to the police I don’t think there would be anything they could do based on a funny feeling you got. Maybe I’m wrong, though.

If she's under age/under the age of consent, they can call her parents to come get her or take her home. I'm not sure what they could "do" to the male based on this situation since they were just sitting on a bench other than tell him he shouldn't be hanging out with young females. This assumes they were just sitting on a bench talking and not doing anything else.

(It may be an entirely different situation if the young female is special needs.)

[Deleted]

If you're seriously concerned you could see if there's some missing or runaway teen that matches her description

[waverly]

Gosh, I don’t know. If you knew the person and knew they were a minor you could talk to the parents.

If you weren’t interested in approaching them I’m not sure what calling the police would do- presuming they have left the park by now, and the police would not know who they are or be able to find them.

If they were there now, you could ask to talk to her privately and see how she is doing and who she is. Or introduce yourself to the couple as sort of an over friendly neighbor and scope it out.

[isabel]

I think it would have been smart to approach them, especially since you were with your H, and ask her directly if she was ok. I don’t know that I’d have questioned beyond that though.

I would call the non emergency line and give them photos. Maybe it’s nothing and not a big deal, but if she’s a missing person or something happens, the photos could help.

[af1212]

Apr 4, 2021 15:02:23 GMT -5 mofongo said:

Unless he’s a know person to the police I don’t think there would be anything they could do based on a funny feeling you got. Maybe I’m wrong, though.

When I was about 20 I was making out with a guy (he was prob 25) in a car in a parking lot. A police officer came and knocked on the window and had us both get out (EMBARRASSING). He pulled me aside so the guy couldn’t hear and asked me if I was ok, if I needed any help, if I felt safe with this guy.

At the time I was completely humiliated but as an adult and especially the mom of three girls I am so grateful for it looking back. I hope they still do things like this.

[af1212]

Apr 4, 2021 16:46:54 GMT -5 mofongo said:

Apr 4, 2021 16:37:00 GMT -5 af1212 said:

When I was about 20 I was making out with a guy (he was prob 25) in a car in a parking lot. A police officer came and knocked on the window and had us both get out (EMBARRASSING). He pulled me aside so the guy couldn’t hear and asked me if I was ok, if I needed any help, if I felt safe with this guy.

At the time I was completely humiliated but as an adult and especially the mom of three girls I am so grateful for it looking back. I hope they still do things like this.

That makes sense, but I don’t see how that would help at this point and time with this story.

I may have misquoted. I was speaking to what could (possible/hopefully) happen if they had called the police while at the park.

I agree now that they have left and have a pic of two people sitting on a bench from far away, there isn’t really anything that anyone can do.

[purplepenguin7]

It sounds like you have good intentions, but it feels like you are making a lot of assumptions around a quick moment. But, if you really feel like she was in danger, you could call the non-emergency Police line and tell them your story and send them the images. Maybe it was nothing, but if other people reported similar stories in the future (or past) maybe they could tied them together.

[mcmel]

What would I do? Nothing.

[sapphireblue]

I think in the moment I might have approached them and asked them something...do they know where the closest gas station is? How do you get to the highway? Just something a stranger might ask someone, just to see more interaction to gain more information.

At this point, I would keep my antenna up more than usual about any local cases but move on.

[VillainV]

Could have been nothing, could have been something. At this point I don’t know that there’s much you could do except keep your eyes/ears open for missing persons reports/runaway teen reports on Facebook.

In hindsight? I’d maybe have gone up and tried to ask a few simple questions like PP suggested above to see if I could assess the situation better. I don’t know that I would have thought about that in the moment though.

[icedcoffee]

I’d probably have done nothing, but this is how those missing person crimes always get solved so props to you for being alert.

At this point I’d probably just keep an ear open for local stories. Maybe send them to the non emergency line like someone else suggested.

[mustardseed2007]

It's hard in the moment to know what to do and now that the moment has passed I don't know if there is anything you can do. But, where I live I could call the constable. In our area that seems to be who all the moms call when there's something going on but they aren't sure what it is. Their dispatch is not 911 but the constable has patrol contracts with the neighborhoods and so they respond very quickly.

Actually at this point if you wanted to you could call the constable and give them the picture and tell them. They would listen to you and if he was known to them it may be helpful to them. Even if they didn't do anything you tried.

Again, though, this might really be a local resource that doesn't work like that other places.

[RoxMonster]

I think at this time, there's really nothing to do except keep an eye out for local missing person stories where they might match her description.

In the moment, if it should ever happen again, if you feel comfortable doing so, I would maybe approach them and ask something basic like pretend you are not from there and need directions or whatever. If you still get an off feeling, then move away and call the police.

Walking back to our hotel at 3 AM In Vegas once, we came upon an older man and a much younger looking woman who was basically almost unconscious. He was like propping her up and basically dragging her toward our same hotel. I noticed it immediately, and a group of guys nearby asked her if she was oK. The guy answered "Yep just too much vodka!" It still did not feel right, so once we were in our hotel, I told the nearest security guard. He was taking this woman toward the elevators and presumably up to a room, and the guard went after them. Not sure of the outcome, but I am glad I did say something.

[af1212]

Just want to add that I have not thought of that time on the car when the police came in probably 15+ years.

I took some time today to write a letter to the police station thanking them for doing that. I’m sure that in the moment I did not act grateful to the officer (although I was polite) and I truly was fine with the guy. But I bet no one ever thanks them for checking on an ok young woman in that situation.

Better late than never!