If you like WFH: questions about work socialization

[SusanBAnthony]

This question is for people who are FT remote or WFH.

As we move back to the office, we are getting a ton of requests for in person team building and socializing type stuff. Think new employee social groups, happy hours, team building outings, volunteering events, etc. But we are wondering what to do about the folks who are still remote. Obviously we can just ask people, but I am trying to get a general feel and see what other companies are doing.

If you are remote, do you want:

1. Never to go to these horrible things ever again. Go ahead and have in person stuff, yay for me that I don't have to go.
2. To have remote options for those who want them, but also in person stuff.
3. To have everything online so it is accessable to everyone.

What are other companies doing?
4. Something else.

[Deleted]

I would never go to an event again if I didn't have to. I'm an introvert and honestly thrive at home. But, I can also see the benefit to others who don't necessarily love the isolation, but do so for other reasons. I think that probably C would be the most inclusive, but see no harm in option B, just don't make me participate!

[loira]

I like the in-person events where there's no pressure to attend. Then I can go to one every other month or so and enjoy myself. The online socializing is not for me.

[Deleted]

I've been on both sides (remote and in person) as well as managed employees that have been on both sides.

The remote employees - all of my employees that were remote were a plane trip away or about 90 minutes away. For the 90 minute away group, they were always invited to the in person happy hours but understood if they couldn't attend. A lot of time they just planned a day in the office for that and it worked out well. You just want to ensure you give them enough time to plan (don't tell them on a Wednesday that it's this Friday). For the ones a plane trip away, they weren't included in these, but if they were going to be in town for something else we would plan around those dates. We also would fly all of these employees in once a year for our holiday event. Of course, we're talking about 5 people so not a huge number. However, I've had large sites in two locations and it was me who flew both places and had 2 separate events.

During the pandemic while we were all at home we did the virtual thing - I don't think we'll continue that but might do that with everyone once a year (versus about once a quarter we were doing it previously).

There are positives and negatives to being remote/on site. I'm sure the employees understand that one of the negatives (or positives depending on your view point) are in person happy hours/events.

[twinmomma]

Our full remote employees will all be flown in once a quarter for a week of in-office time. They will all be there the same week and it's expected that managers will plan teambuilders, activities, etc. during that week since it's the main goal of having the remote people get some face time and socialization. Our social committee will also make sure that company-wide events coincide with that week as much as possible.

For ongoing, smaller company events we're trying to figure that out now. Some things are easy - if we're handing out tshirts, we ship them to the fully remote folks. If we're buying breakfast one day as a quick perk, then likely remote people won't get that exact perk. But it's a trade off because being fully remote is kind of a perk on it's own.

[lemoncupcake]

Are they remote in another geographic area far from the office? Or in the city but not at the office?

If they’re in your area plan in person events and they can join if they want. I like working from home but would be more than happy to socialize in person for fun stuff.

If they’re not able to attend because they’re too far away then a remote option is good (for everybody to be invited to not just the remote employees)

[Deleted]

People actually request these things? There are Social Committees? I am breaking out in hives just thinking about it.

While i clearly want no part of it, i understand that remote employees are often overlooked due to lack of face time, so i vote for #2. For staff want to socialize, online options won't fill that need. For misanthropes like me, it's nice to be invited but not expected to actually attend.

[litebright]

My vote would be #2.

My company has been FT, 100% remote even before covid, and we are small (around 10 people) but international. We do the occasional Zoom happy hour, only when someone (usually me) brings it up, schedules it and puts out an invite to everybody via slack. No pressure to join, some people are in time zones where it won't even work for them anyway.

I wish I could socialize in-person with my coworkers. I like several of them a lot and would be friends IRL if that were possible. But online is really the only option, we don't live geographically close enough for anything else. We sometimes see each other at industry conferences. Rarely, like once a year or every couple of years, we decide that most/all of us will go to a particular conference, then we have dinner together or something like that, but that's the extent of our in-person time.

I haven't seen any of my coworkers since 2019. Some people, over the years, have joined and then left the company and I've never met them face to face. It's an interesting challenge to bringing people on and making them feel like part of a team. Chit-chat on slack and actually having cameras on for Zoom meetings does seem to help somewhat.

Although this post just reminded me that one of my coworkers actually is in the area temporarily and I should GTG with him for lunch or coffee or something, he's been digital-nomading it in Barbados.

[lilafowler]

Jul 14, 2021 13:24:20 GMT -5 twinmomma said:

Our full remote employees will all be flown in once a quarter for a week of in-office time. They will all be there the same week and it's expected that managers will plan teambuilders, activities, etc. during that week since it's the main goal of having the remote people get some face time and socialization. Our social committee will also make sure that company-wide events coincide with that week as much as possible.

For ongoing, smaller company events we're trying to figure that out now. Some things are easy - if we're handing out tshirts, we ship them to the fully remote folks. If we're buying breakfast one day as a quick perk, then likely remote people won't get that exact perk. But it's a trade off because being fully remote is kind of a perk on it's own.

Wow! I work for a decent size financial company and they would NEVER shell out the $$$ for that. Then again we have 4 locations across the country and WFH employees scattered about (just on my team we have people in Mass, Arizona, Connecticut, Florida and Illinois).

Before Covid they were actually cutting down on travel reimbursement/etc. and utilizing Skype and virtual meetings.

I’m seriously impressed and a little envious.

[hocus2]

We have a remote team at my company that has some of these team building functions designed around remote needs. IF you also live within driving distance of a physical office you get invited to their in person events as well. These are pretty much optional here so folks do what they want. I will say that for folks who want very senior positions these things can be important.

[twinmomma]

lilafowler, This set up was basically the CEO's concession to allowing full remote staff. He was very anti-remote before Covid but now sees the light. We're also a very social company, so people who work here love this stuff. It's maybe a dozen remote people that we'll be flying in at a time right now, so not a huge amount.

[goldengirlz]

I think you have to err on the side of inclusivity, even if people are WFH purely out of preference. There may be certain groups who are more inclined to choose WFH (mothers, people with disabilities) and it would be bad practice to exclude them and open you up to accusations that remote workers are at a disadvantage.

I think a hybrid option makes the most sense. Plan certain things where people can dial in (or otherwise participate) remotely and others that are in person. For example, one of my favorite virtual team-building events that we did last year was a wellness challenge where you got points every time you did a wellness activity (anything from meditation to playing with your kids to physical fitness of any kind.) It was low-stakes competitive (every team had its own Slack room and then there was a group-wide Slack channel) and you could participate entirely on your own time. I liked the separate-but-together-ness of it.

[cinnamoncox0]

I feel like it never hurts to include them to offer some remote opportunities to connect with teams in whatever way makes sense for your people/office/industry.
I have anxiety thinking about a company with a social committee I’m so introverted. But I think it’s great that it works for them.
I think being remote may just come with the reality that they can’t be at most non work things.
Being remote is a benefit in most cases in terms of no commute etc, so one of the trade offs will be fewer chances to socialize. Unless everyone is super local but staying remote then invite in person and no online event since they could have come, it’s not like they’d have had to fly in or something.

[sadlebred]

My company has too many departments and divisions for everyone to socialize together.

I work on a small team, and we are generally anti-social. LOL! We would never consider putting ourselves through a happy hour with ourselves or a team building exercise. We've been together for years and know one another well. It's expected at some point next year we will have an in person meeting for our larger team somewhere in the company footprint. We'll be expected to go to that and participate in all the stupid crap.

[Cappy]

I think a good start is to ask the employees this same question and allow some autonomy for employees to choose their engagement level.

Personally-- #1: I never want to do another workplace social thing again. My coworkers are great but I work for a paycheck not friends. I love being remote now where I don't have to potluck things, sign birthday cards, chip in for gifts, bowl, etc. It placed an enormous mental load on me. It just made me resentful of my workplace. Years ago our unit had a social committee and I was spending $50/month on themed activities, potlucks, and birthday celebrations, not to mention getting behind on my actual workload in all those meetings and events.

[glw]

Everyone is still fully remote at my job. We are doing bi-weekly 1/2 hour zooms that are either totally social or introducing new hires + social. They have been great because meeting a new person in a meeting is not really "meeting" them, i.e. I can't ask about their pets without being weird. There's no pressure to attend at all.
When we transition to some people back in the office (I will stay remote) I hope that they keep inviting me to social things. We had great holiday parties, volunteer activities, and new hire/retirement parties pre-covid and I would hate to be excluded from those. (I live within commuting distance, though. If it were a plane ride away, I would still like to be invited but might only attend once or twice a year.)

[ECB]

I vote #2 too.

I think social stuff is so subjective and dependent. My old job? I really liked my coworkers, am still friends with many of them almost 15 year after leaving that company - I enjoyed happy hours and seeing people out of work.

Present job (almost 15 years in!) - eh, I haven't made any strong connections and I could take the socializing or leave it. But then I also wonder - if we had socialized more over the years, would I have made friends? (It's a state university located in the city - the happy hour scene just never happened) I've actually gotten to know a few people a bit better over the past year - somehow while waiting in Zoom meetings for others to arrive, some of us would start chatting and started to get to know each other a bit. It was kind of nice!

So.... I think having the options on both fronts will hopefully fill the needs of everyone.

[shauni27]

I am fully remote and mostly love it. But it would be nice if we had in person gatherings to just boost morale every now and then. Like, a summer picnic for employees and their families, or a winter holiday party. Just a chance to catch up with the people I used to see daily and now have not seen in 18 months.

But it also doesn't hurt my feelings that we don't do it, lol.

[ellipses84]

Introvert here so I generally don’t like the virtual or in person social stuff. If it’s virtual there really needs to be a host who makes sure everyone has the chance to talk by calling individuals by name and giving them the opportunity. It often feels like one more meeting. My work does a little get to know you with 1 person per week as part of our weekly staff meeting which only takes a few minutes and is nice. I think the worst situation is that when you are virtual and others are not, on a call or video call (like that HQ party on The Office). For in person, Happy Hours would be difficult due to scheduling but I may attend if there is advance notice. Holiday parties / family picnics / once or twice a year celebrations are ok with a lot of advanced notice and it’s nice if you are willing to cover a hotel room or travel costs for people who are a little further (or an Uber / Lyft home for each person). My work does team lunches to celebrate big project milestones (so far just meeting for an outdoor lunch at a restaurant) and that is nice. I prefer the small group.

[sandandsea]

Agree with #2.

[revolution]

I've been working remotely for about 3 years. I wouldn't mind being invited to the office once a year for a shindig, I'd kind of like it.

Other than that, I do appreciate know a social thing is happening, just to feel part of the team but I know I can't make anything since they are a plane ride away. That said, if they get an extra long lunch or get out of work for an afternoon or a few hours early - let the remote people have the same time off.

ETA:  I want zero to do with remote zoom social things.  no thank you.

[amberlyrose]

I've been with my company for about 8 years in a remote/travel role. About 90% of the company was either traveling or working from home. Networking is also a huge part of our jobs, so we were pretty good at this before Covid.
I like it because I love socializing once every few weeks, but I'm really an introvert that needs 3 days to decompress from a social event.

A few things we did pre-Covid
1- Quarterly all hands meetings for departments. We went to our closest local office, but most of the meeting presentation was over Teams. Usually free lunch and paid HH nearby. For those that could not make it, they might get an Uber Eats credit or option to expense like $20 for lunch or drinks.
2- Lunch and Learn sessions through employee resource groups. Budget tended to be smaller, so food was only provided for those in person but there was always a call-in option.
3- Two big social events, usually in the summer and winter. The summer one was a big blowout with prizes, music, and catered meals. If you wanted to network, that was the place to be. People would travel to the nearest office and many teams would plan big meetings to coincide with it.
4- Monthly networking days. In my first office, it was first Friday. Current office, it was the 3rd Friday. If you enjoyed going, you could easily plan around it and we'd encourage each other to go and hang out. Portions of the day's events (learning calls, etc) had virtual options.

During the pandemic:
1- Sounds cheesy, but my favorite social events were crafty things and I'm not crafty. We did a paint and sip, with the company paying for two kits per employee that joined. So many people had their kids involved. Another was a women's event where we made an air plant terrarium during a panel discussion.
2- Wellness challenges, cooking, workout, or meditation classes. If you didn't want to turn on your camera, you didn't have to.
3- Random swag bags. I swear half my kitchen is now branded items. lol! Coffee cups with a gc, shirts to wear on virtual HH calls, etc.

No one was ever penalized for not getting involved, but I love that there are a ton of options so you can really build that community remotely within your interests. Some of my closest friends at work are people I see maybe twice a year, if that.

[raleighnc]

2. If everything was online, I would feel pressured to join because I would feel like the in person people were trying to accommodate us when they could be doing something more enjoyable.

I like the idea of doing a shared activity. My favorite "social" activity was when 90 percent of the team was remote and everyone got $30 per quarter for a loose theme. Like "gardening/outdoors" - people got garden stuff or houseplants or windchimes or whatever. Or "wellness" and people got exercise equipment or a massage or a state park pass. Then we all reported back at our meeting. I learned way more about my team members from their failed tomato plants than a happy hour.