I decided to screw the go do list and just let myself wallow. This weekend will be 12 years since my first mom passed from ovarian cancer and 1 year since my other moms pancreatic cancer was diagnosed. That was really when I lost her since my stepmom got weirdly protective and wouldn’t let me see/talk to her much
My husband is on call for every holiday through and including NYE/NYD so we were thinking about having a movie marathon for Halloween and making some fun food?
We have some movies we watch each October (Jennifer’s Body, Hocus Pocus, Lost Boys and Bell, Book and Candle) but need to add something new if we are doing a special marathon. Any suggestions? We normally do fun vs gory.
Post by soccermama on Oct 19, 2021 12:15:06 GMT -5
I'm so excited!!! We have been trying to plan a mountain getaway over Veteran's Day weekend (DH is on his 4-day break which is great!). We really wanted to take our camper because its more cost-effective, but all the campgrounds we contacted were either booked or they close on 10/31. I wasn't sure if DH would go for trying to rent a cabin for 3 nights because $$$$.
He surprised me last night & said he booked a cabin for our family!! He just sent me the link and the cabin looks super nice. I grew up going to the mtns all the time (have family there), but we haven't been able to take our kids very much so I'm really looking forward to taking them up there! Hope to do a little hiking too.
My H left for a work trip last night and I had some of the best sleep ever. Coincidence?
I have a hair appointment after work and then I'm planning to pick up dinner from my favorite Mexican place. I've been craving their guac and pico for weeks!
My almost 11YO DS is so sweet. My wedding anniversary is coming up and I told DS I was going to get his dad a National Parks Annual Pass so he could visit any park in America. (Both DS and DH are history buffs.) And he got really serious and said, "That's a great gift, mama, but are you sure you can afford it?" 💔 😢
We have no money problems. In his mind, that's SUCH a great gift that it was sure to be unaffordable. He's literally the best.
ETA: Yes, he still calls me mama. We're Italian American, ok? He probably will until I die. LOL.
muffin0 , I just want to give you a hug. That's awful and I am so sorry that you have to deal with your selfish and horrible in laws. It is really hard when people you love can't see how much they are hurting you and your relationship and just do the right thing. I wouldn't blame you if you completely wrote them off and never spoke to them again.
Also you and your H are doing the right thing by your kid to not expose them to the pain and irreparable damage that your ILs will cause them. You are showing your kid that you love and support them no matter what. You are great parents and don't let your ILs ever make you question that.
You don't have to get over anything. They're fucking awful and don't deserve access to you or your family.
Your child has done nothing wrong. You have done nothing wrong. You're all just out here trying to live the best you can. They have chosen to live hatefully.
Fuck them. You may not be there yet, but I would start the convo about cutting these monsters out. They will only harm your child and your family. Fuck that shit. Let them answer to their precious Jesus. You've got a beautiful and amazing kid to support and those nasty pigs don't deserve a second of your time or energy.
Post by MixedBerryJam on Oct 19, 2021 13:44:47 GMT -5
I just signed the P&S on my house. The buyer is the first person who looked at it, although we had a 3-day open house in the days that followed their showing. I’m much sadder about this than I expected to be but I’m glad a young family will be moving in. Pretty much the only thing I cared about was that the people who bought appreciated the woods we abut (2500 acres of protected state-owned woodland). We’ve been there since 1988 and I was terrified the inspection would uncover some disaster-in-waiting but they didn’t ask for a single repair or accommodation. Phew!
I have no idea why rheumatologists are in such demand. Every other specialist I call about seeing can usually get me in within about 2 weeks and the rheumatologist is always scheduling like 4-5 months out. I just bumped the appointment I was supposed to have with her this Thursday because I'm still waiting to schedule a CT scan, which will be helpful to discuss with her since I haven't had one since the last time I was there, and now I'm booked for February. (She's not the one ordering the CT scan, hematology is, and then I need to talk to them, pulmonology, and rheumatology.)
Anyone thinking about going to med school - become a rheumatologist!
I’m irrationally annoyed that a publisher sent me a textbook that I didn’t request. A global history of art I and II combined edition! It’s HUGE. I don’t make decisions about textbooks! And did I mention? ITS SO FRICKIN BIG? I can’t sell it or trade it in, I feel guilty throwing it out, but I have it digitally as well. I guess I’ll just take it to my office and leave it there.
A paper, hardback, nearly 1000 page book! Like, thanks publisher, I guess
Can you just leave it in the department waiting area? Or even put a “free to good home” post-it on it?
And now I get a call from the school because my kid is acting out. If he doesn't cut it out he will be removed from accelerated math. Like...seriously.
muffin0, you don't need to get over anything. I would just cut off contact. It's not worth the abuse you all will suffer by accommodating them in any manner.
Post by Leeham Rimes on Oct 19, 2021 15:49:35 GMT -5
muffin0 , I’m so sorry how they are treating you, your child, and your family. It’s inexcusable.
(Below is some unasked for advice, so feel free to bypass.)
Something I learned in therapy is that forgiveness is for YOU and that “forgiveness doesn’t mean reunification” (my therapist’s words). Now, I know my situation is not at all similar to yours, and I’ve had 20 + years to figure out how to deal with the hellscape of my parents, but that really just changed the entire way I thought about what it means to forgive.
Now, I’m not saying that you have to do anything, but if you do decide one day to “forgive”, it can be for you/your family, so that you don’t have to live in the mental torment of their bullshit. You can still cut them off. You can still have nothing to do with them. They are not owed a relationship with you or your family. You can forgive but also be done with them entirely.
Last Edit: Oct 19, 2021 15:49:55 GMT -5 by Leeham Rimes
I need ham like water Like breath, like rain I need ham like mercy From Heaven's gate Sometimes ham salad or casserole or ham that’s free range, all natural I need ham
muffin0 , I’m so sorry how they are treating you, your child, and your family. It’s inexcusable.
(Below is some unasked for advice, so feel free to bypass.)
Something I learned in therapy is that forgiveness is for YOU and that “forgiveness doesn’t mean reunification” (my therapist’s words). Now, I know my situation is not at all similar to yours, and I’ve had 20 + years to figure out how to deal with the hellscape of my parents, but that really just changed the entire way I thought about what it means to forgive.
Now, I’m not saying that you have to do anything, but if you do decide one day to “forgive”, it can be for you/your family, so that you don’t have to live in the mental torment of their bullshit. You can still cut them off. You can still have nothing to do with them. They are not owed a relationship with you or your family. You can forgive but also be done with them entirely.