11/15 randoms (or maybe work stuff)

[rubytue]

Seems like randoms often become work vents and job changing stuff, so I’m adding to it. 

I love where i work, what we do, or missions, etc. but I *hate* my position. I actually tried to give it up (and lose a GS grade) when I was dealing with cancer. This position just had too much stuff loaded into it, and I have no idea how they think one person can do it all. Lately, I don’t even pretend anymore, and if they ask me something I don’t know, I just admit it. (I “manage” roughly 30 regulations and 10 other projects, and management expects me to be able to answer details about any one of them on call). But this isn’t about fixing this position…

I put in for a lateral move right before vacation. The group is rumored to have two positions coming, the one I put in for and another one that is brand new. I would really rather have the brand new one because the brand new thing really excites me. But, I am so miserable, I am going for the other one because it’s here now. I’m overly hopeful because the hiring manager has interviewed me before and had really positive feedback (like shocked I didn’t get the position she was on the panel for).  And, being government and wanting to avoid any appearance of prohibited personelle practices, I don’t feel I can talk to the hiring manager about the future position. If I knew the timeline…

But then, I feel so weird because (TW) the previous person passed away and the funeral is this week. And… survivors guilt that I’m so eager for his job. And he was so awesome. 🥴

[1confused1]

I feel the same as you but I also feel so stuck. I have been in my industry since 2001 and would love to try something new, but I can’t afford to take a pay cut. I’m seriously just biding my time until I can retire, which is not a great way to live.

[ssmjlm]

rubytue I don’t think it’s wrong to ask about the new position. That’s sort of how I got my last promotion. I interviewed for X, but they had 2 vacancies at that grade. My boss’ boss called me up and said “we think you would be better in this position, would you be ok with that?” And I spent the weekend thinking. I obviously took it and it’s been better than I imagined.

[VillainV]

Adding more to the saga of the weird dude-bro doctor (the one who is trying to convince me to do strict keto), I went for my annual check-up and he tried to convince me that it’s somehow unhealthy to not ever have periods. I take BCP continuously to avoid menstruating for a lot of reasons, mostly convenience. I’ve had both male and female GYNs tell me this is completely safe and that there is no medical reason to menstruate, and enthusiastically prescribe BCP to be taken continuously. Well, dude-bro thinks I need to have 3-4 cycles a year.

You guys, I really wish you’d seen the lightning bolts coming out of my eyes as dude who has never menstruated (and isn’t a GYN) tell me that I need to menstruate. 😂

He did provide good reminders about calcium supplements and self-breast exams, so there’s that. Also, the new female doc has arrived and I’m hoping I’ll be able to see her from now on.

[rubytue]

VillainV, wow. That is just insane. I have found that male doctors outside of gyn treat that whole thing like the “here there be monsters” part of an ancient map. But that’s a whole new level of whack,

[audette]

VillainV - hopefully dudebro doesn't cause any problems with your current BCP plan.



My random - I finally have a reprieve from the work insanity. No more mandatory OT, and a return to a deskjob! Whoo-hoo! Even a couple days off, as a thank you for sticking it out thru 5 weeks of 60+ hour weeks doing physical work. I am celebrating by getting boosted (finally have enough down-time to do it), and unpacking at our new home.

Sadly, that physical work has caused (led to enough issues that they were found?) carpal tunnel and tennis elbow. Go me! It's a two-fer. (blargh)


So, unpacking may need to be done gently, and with many breaks. Such is life. It won't be the first time I'm unpacking after a move while on medical defined limits.



In happiest news - unlike VillainV's dudebro doc, I now have a new primary care doc that is awesome! (the one I saw for the carpal tunnel stuff, and had a followup with her today, where she checked on the wrists, elbows, and all the rest of me). I really like her manner of discussion and how she interacts with me as a patient. Yay!

[VillainV]

[mention]audette [/mention] yay for regular hours and a desk job!

[Michelle]

Nov 17, 2021 22:35:04 GMT -5 rubytue said:

But then, I feel so weird because (TW) the previous person passed away and the funeral is this week. And… survivors guilt that I’m so eager for his job. And he was so awesome. 🥴

That can be hard, but you didn't do anything to cause or contribute to his death. Reminder yourself of that.

I was promoted when my work brother died. My position and his were combined and I was moved into his office. It still seems surreal sometimes. To honor him and help me manage the grief and survivor's guilt, I printed a quote of something he said that is inspiring, and framed it and have it on my bookcase for any office visitors to see.

[amberlyrose]

Nov 17, 2021 22:35:04 GMT -5 rubytue said:

I love where i work, what we do, or missions, etc. but I *hate* my position. 

That would be so hard, especially when it's mingled with that survivor's guilt.  

I love the company I'm with and where I sit within the org because of our direct influence on creating change. But I also hate my position.

I moved into it this summer thinking it was going to be completely different. Before I agreed to the move (lateral, but supposed to be more visibility and project management), I even said "I do not want to take it if the majority of responsibilities will be X, Y, and Z. as I think that would be more of a step back for me and will not be effective in our overall goal." Outlined my ideas, plans, and other ways to attack the issues. Team leads agreed, said it would be what I had outlined, etc. About a month in, there's an org structure change and the main task I listed during that convo is now what the expectation is 75% of my time. And as I said, it is the least effective way to reach our goal.

I really wish I hadn't moved teams and I feel liked I've checked out, which is not like me. 

[rubytue]

Nov 18, 2021 14:57:17 GMT -5 amberlyrose said:

Nov 17, 2021 22:35:04 GMT -5 rubytue said:

I really wish I hadn't moved teams and I feel liked I've checked out, which is not like me. 

Yesterday I was coping with everything with the thought “this won’t be my problem soon.” But that’s my ego talking and I can’t guarantee that. But today, it involved me telling my boss “if you need this done by COB, I will have a mental breakdown.” 

[msmerymac]

I’m sitting at the airport with a colleague, a man in his late 40s. We were both on our laptops when another coworker called him. A minute later, a woman came up to me and asked a question. Once my colleague was off the call he told me what had been discussed (a new project we’re doing with a client who i led a project for a few months ago) and then said, “oh. What did that woman ask you?”

“Uh, she was just looking for a tampon. This is a big airport, must be some around here!”

🤦‍♀️

[pumpkincat]

I recently accepted a new job - yay! I've been voluntarily unemployed since I quit my last debacle back in August. This should be much less stressful - working for a former manager of mine at a new company. Taking a step back in terms of responsibility (and pay) but ok with both.

My only concern is needing to do a pre-employment drug test. Recreational marijuana is legal here, but pretty sure they're screening for it anyway? I've been indulging off and on the last few months. Here's hoping it's not a big deal, or I can explain it away.

[pixy0stix]

Nov 18, 2021 17:14:46 GMT -5 pumpkincat said:

I recently accepted a new job - yay! I've been voluntarily unemployed since I quit my last debacle back in August. This should be much less stressful - working for a former manager of mine at a new company. Taking a step back in terms of responsibility (and pay) but ok with both.

My only concern is needing to do a pre-employment drug test. Recreational marijuana is legal here, but pretty sure they're screening for it anyway? I've been indulging off and on the last few months. Here's hoping it's not a big deal, or I can explain it away.

It really depends on the employer. Most government jobs do still screen for mj, and will not employ if you test positive since it's still federally illegal. That being said, abstain for a week and drink plenty of water, and you should be fine. (If it's a pee test. If it's a hair test, you're SOL since it stays around for weeks in your hair folicles.)

[wildrice]

I am in this weird limbo where I have accepted a new job but I still have a few weeks at my current job. I do not feel checked out yet and so it's this weird thing where it feels surreal that I'm leaving. I'm really excited about the new place, but I am going to miss the relationships I've built at my old job. I know that's just how jobs go, but I moved halfway across the country a little over 3 years ago and it's only been in the last several months that I really was starting to feel like I have a network and solid relationships, and now I'm blowing that up again.

My commute has felt really awful since accepting that job, though. Knowing that I will no longer have to sit in traffic for an hour twice a day has made me super impatient and makes it feel like it takes FOREVER, especially in the evening when I just want to get home. I will be working remote a lot, and when I do go in my commute should be more like 30 minutes.

[mbcdefg]

This is so ridiculously on-brand for Hudson County NJ:

Search for Jimmy Hoffa Leads the F.B.I. to Jersey City Landfill

Decades after Jimmy Hoffa’s disappearance captivated the nation, the FBI is once again looking for the body of the mob-connected labor leader in an investigation spurred by a deathbed confession. According to the New York Times, in late October the FBI began a site survey on a former dump near the Pulaski Skyway in Jersey City to look for a steel drum 15 feet below the earth that may contain Hoffa’s body.

nymag.com/intelligencer/2021/11/fbi-searches-new-jersey-landfill-for-jimmy-hoffas-body.html

[sonrisa]

Nov 18, 2021 18:53:17 GMT -5 pixy0stix said:

Nov 18, 2021 17:14:46 GMT -5 pumpkincat said:

I recently accepted a new job - yay! I've been voluntarily unemployed since I quit my last debacle back in August. This should be much less stressful - working for a former manager of mine at a new company. Taking a step back in terms of responsibility (and pay) but ok with both.

My only concern is needing to do a pre-employment drug test. Recreational marijuana is legal here, but pretty sure they're screening for it anyway? I've been indulging off and on the last few months. Here's hoping it's not a big deal, or I can explain it away.

It really depends on the employer. Most government jobs do still screen for mj, and will not employ if you test positive since it's still federally illegal. That being said, abstain for a week and drink plenty of water, and you should be fine. (If it's a pee test. If it's a hair test, you're SOL since it stays around for weeks in your hair folicles.)

It also depends on the federal job, I believe. Sometimes being honest that you have used it in the past can be the best option. For some jobs, they will ding you more for lying about use than the use itself.  I think you still have to say you have stopped and will not use it again (or at least during the course of your federal employment). (At least that was true for a friend).

[rubytue]

I just got home from my friend/coworkers funeral. He worked at the same place as me for over 20 years, and was beloved by all. I don’t want to let covid be a scape goat, but his passing has taught me a lot about how much management doesn’t give a shit about us. He passed in September, and even yesterday, there were people that did not know he had passed, let alone the funeral. And no one person from senior management showed up. Luckily, there were about a dozen of us who came, so the family knew he was loved. But every one of us noticed who was *not* there.

These people (senior leadership/management) is always upset when out annual morale survey shows we a low level of trust is senior leadership. And yet, they do shit like this to show they don’t give a shit about us.

A few years ago, a friend of mine from another agency asked to borrow my carry on (we were at a trading near my house, he was in a hotel) so he could fly out in the morning for a coworker’s funeral in Colorado. I asked if they were close, and he said no, but it was the right thing to do. At the time, I didn’t totally get it. But now I see, THAT was leadership.

Also, fuck ALS! Today would have been my friends 54th birthday. 😭

[chilerellanos]

I’m very frustrated at my job.

I started orienting this nurse in February of last year. I approached my supervisor within 4 weeks and told her that she wasn’t going to make it, and had very specific concerns.

I was told to make it work, and that I needed to be a better preceptor. And they ignored all of my concerns (and they’re big ones!!!).
I refused to orient her anymore, so she got bounced around and everybody else had the same concerns. Due to staffing, they just doubled down on her. It’s now like 9-10 months in, and she still needs constant supervision and isn’t even close to being independent (and I don’t think ever will be).

Like, she’s fine if you give her a task to do, but she can’t think through situations on her own. She never will be able to do that quick enough. She also struggles with BASIC tasks (like priming IV tubing and working our pumps). I put in an incident report on her the other night for a MAJOR safety concern due to not knowing how to set up her IV lines.

I have had to go back to night shift to help because they just need someone with a lot of experience.

There’s another nurse who I am so frustrated with as well. She’s brand new and argues with me constantly about what to do (in front of the patient even). I’m just about ready to walk the fuck out because it’s so stressful every time I’m at work, and knowing if something happens overnight that I’m on my own to manage an emergency.

I live in an area though where there aren’t a lot of options to work, so I can’t just easily get a new job.

[mrspez07]

rubytue I’m so sorry for your loss and the lack of leadership.
And yes, fuck ALS. We lost FIL to it in Sept.

[mrspez07]

Hers my work dump:
Co-worker just found out his sister and nephew died from covid in a different state yesterday. Sobering. I was booking my covid booster when boss told us.

So, small company, boss wants to transition to retirement, offered ownership buy-in earlier this year to some of us. Didn’t work out. Threw out another hourly scenario while maintaining benefits then didn’t go with that. Announced this week one of my co-worker’s is going to take on more leadership to let boss step back starting Jan. So keeping things nearly the same. I was not loving the workload, type of work, etc and the hourly thing kinda threw me out of sorts. Also been doing a lot of work an entry-level person (that we don’t have) could do. We all have 15+ years experience.
Around the time the hourly thing was mentioned, my friend also happened to mention that she’s like me to come work with her at a similar company, so a lateral move. I had nearly come around at pursuing that opportunity and then something came up that made that ethically weird. So now, I’m trying to figure out if I can make this work with current place, should jump ship without having to really interview/prepare a portfolio for the lateral move, or start looking for something completely different. It’s been a stressful week+!

[idahome]

It’s been a frustrating week. Im in insurance and this i has been my first renewal cycle. I’ve been mostly independent throughout and really feel like I’ve been left to manage everything on my own when there should’ve been more active checking from management. Coupled with a need to report regularly on how many emails are in my inbox to meet an arbitrary standard…I’m ready to phone it in for the next week.

Side note: parents living with you as an adult is extremely challenging. I don’t know that it’s sustainable for the next 20-30 years (I have relatively young, in age, parents), but I also don’t feel like I can have those kinds of hard conversations, either.

Needless to say, I just want to go stay in a hotel for a few days…alone…and not do anything.