My stepdad passed away

[sweetchix]

I had posted back in November how he had been admitted to the hospital the day before thanksgiving. Well, he never got out. He had one issue and after another and his body just couldn’t handle it anymore.

He was admitted for pneumonia and then they discovered he had leukemia. That started chemotherapy twice a day and were hoping he’d be home by Christmas, New Year’s at the latest. Then they found fungus or something in his lung so they had to get that cleared up. Then he had another issue where they moved him into ICU and sedated him for a couple of days. After he came out that, they were again hoping he’d be able to go home, but then he had an infection in his knee that he had had replaced years ago. They had to do surgery. Prior to surgery, they found out he had covid. They still went ahead with the surgery and the plan was to move him to rehab once he recovered from covid. But his body couldn’t take anymore and he passed away last night.

I am flying down to SC tomorrow to be with my mom for the week. I don’t know how to tell DDs. They were so close to him and were so distraught when my mom and him moved away. They’re with XH this weekend. I don’t know if I should call or FaceTime or drive out to tell them in person.

He’s been in my life for over 20 years. I was just talking to my mom yesterday about plans for when he comes home and that I could take Paid Family Leave and go down to help out. I’m just so shocked and sad. He was only 64.

[ProfessorArtNerd]

I’m so sorry. I’ll keep you all in my thoughts

[ssmjlm]

I’m so sorry.

If you ex is amenable, I would go tell them in person.

[notoriousmeg]

I’m so very sorry. Thinking of you and your girls.

[styme46]

I am so sorry for your loss. Hugs to you.

[skidunks]

I’m so sorry for your loss.

[nsl]

I'm so very sorry for your loss

[goldengirlz]

I’m so sorry for your loss.

[Nonny]

I'm sorry for your loss. My condolences.

[noodleoo]

Oh that’s so young. I’m so sorry for your loss. My thoughts are with you and your family.

If possible, I’d probably tell the kids in person. 😢

[georgeharrison]

I’m very sorry

[mcmel]

I’m so sorry.

[1confused1]

I am so sorry

[brooke77]

I’m so sorry for your loss.

[fivechickens]

I am so sorry for your loss.

[stemmie]

I'm so sorry. I'm glad you can take some time with your mom; she will really appreciate that.

I would deliver the news in person assuming their dad would 1) be agreeable to you doing so and 2) be a good adult for them to process this sad news with. (My DH isn't great at such things). If not, I would wait until they're home with you.

[sweetchix]

Thank you all.

XH is going to bring DDs over and let them stay for a couple hours so I can tell them in person.

[meowmaps]

I’m so sorry for your loss. Thinking of you and your family.

[dove]

So sorry for your loss.

[pinkdutchtulips]

So sorry for your loss 😢

[cleo29]

I am so sorry for your loss. It is good that your ex is being amenable.

[wildrice]

I am so sorry for your loss. That was so quick

[underwaterrhymes]

I’m so sorry. ❤️❤️

[jamie.1022]

I’m sorry for your loss.

[rosiebear]

I’m so sorry! That’s so young; my condolences to all of you.

[aprilsails]

I’m so very sorry. I’m also very sorry he went through all of that. Big hugs to you and your family.

[Deleted]

I am so sorry for your loss.

[underwaterrhymes]

Also, I don’t know if this will help you, but I want to share that my stepdad died of lung cancer in 2018 on Christmas Day. He was my stepdad since 1992, so he’d been a part of my life for a really long time. He had been sick for a very long time and he had a hard time letting go. He was an atheist, and since I am an agnostic, we talked a lot about how our bodies are made up of energy and how that energy must go somewhere.

After he died, my sister took my mom up to her house so she wasn’t alone. Our niece came in yelling from the garage that there was a bird inside the garage. It was a red cardinal. My mom stayed out there talking to the bird for maybe an hour. Whether or not it was him showing her he was okay is obviously up for interpretation, but every time I see a cardinal I think of him and I know that bird brought my mom and sister a lot of peace that day.

I hope you find moments of peace like this in the coming days. ❤️

[tacokick]

I’m so sorry! I’m glad you can tell them in person.

[W.T.Faulkner]

I’m so sorry you’re going through this.