Post by lucyonajetplane on Sept 25, 2012 16:10:15 GMT -5
Well I deleted my Liubot account and didn't even lurk for a few days. I needed to get my head on straight with the pregnancy news.
I didn't take it properly, and you guys telling me how unfit of a human I am and am going to be made me a little batty.
This is a major thing in my life. It's not like a cut or a bruise. It's a CHILD.
Well for the 3 of you that may actually like me and may actually care, Thank you. Here's an update. The rest of you have every right to ignore me.
I did find out I was pregnant on Friday when I went to the doctor's for what we thought was an asthma attack but turned out to be a mild case of pneumonia. They did a urine test with a dropper on a cassette type thing before my xray. It was positive.
J had an anxiety attack and continued to make himself sick with stress for about 5 hours that day. Now he seems to be on board. I spoke with my family and my friends about it. He spoke with his family and friends about it. We want to have this baby. With everyone on our side except for his mother, she called me highly suggesting an abortion because she feels her son is now "trapped" with me. We have a great support system. J's father has two little kids (5, 3) and will be giving us a boat load of baby stuff. My parents live close by and will be there with me every step of the way. J picked up 12 hour shifts at work and we're putting every extra cent into a savings account for the baby.
I'm seeking overtime, but it's unavailable at my job currently. I have been applying for night time part time jobs because the shoe store didn't work out.
I am being weaned off of my prozac. I called my psych dr immediately and we are going off of the meds. I was told to wean off of smoking cigarettes too, because my baby is already addicted to nicotine so cold turkey would cause stress. I'm down to 3 cigs a day instead of my typical 18-20. I should be smoke free by the end of this week or next.
Yes, in my defense I lash out when I'm pinned against a wall. I can only take so much from people telling me how stupid and idiotic and mentally ill I am. How every decision in my life is a bad one. Well I've made it 28 years so far, and it couldn't all have been bad.
I won't cause trouble on this board. I never thought I did to begin with. I would post my shit and people would respond. Yeah I flipped and called someone a C word. Sorry. To me that's not the worst thing in the world. I curse like a sailor so seriously, it's not a big issue to me. I apologize.
It just blows my mind that I'm gone for a few days and you're polling on whether or not to ban my IP. So much for adults being mature. I also wasn't trolling as JM but believe what you will. I'm just trying to live my life and make decent decisions and ones that have my best interest in order.
Thanks for listening. Do or don't ignore me.
I'm still around.
Oh and as far as Chester the pug, he is my baby. I love him so much and I take great care of him. He gets along with J's dog and we have a funny little family so far.
I have an appointment for the OBGYN on Oct 5, and I also have an appointment to meet with the WIC program on Oct 17 to get help.
No this child wasn't planned, but I'm going to do my best to give it a good life. He/she will have many people who love them and I just want to do the right thing for me in my circumstances.
Post by wrathofkuus on Sept 25, 2012 16:13:21 GMT -5
Oh, Lucy. I'm not saying that you should get an abortion, but please, please consider giving this baby up for adoption. It frightens me to think of you being irrevocably tied to J this way, this soon. I seriously have a knot in my stomach reading this.
Oh, Lucy. I'm not saying that you should get an abortion, but please, please consider giving this baby up for adoption. It frightens me to think of you being irrevocably tied to J this way, this soon. I seriously have a knot in my stomach reading this.
I don't know if I could give it up, kuus. I know J and I are only together for 6 months, but he's a GOOD man. Regardless of whether or not we're going to be together forever, I know we can co-parent together. He is honest to god in love with me, and I do care for him deeply. He makes me feel warm and fuzzy.
I don't always make the best decisions. Yes I was emotionally (not physically) screwing with the work dude, but it put a lot into perspective for me. I know Jimi loves me. I know I love him. I know we can at least try to make this work. He's a good guy.
My life has had many ups and downs. It's not been easy. I'm really smart. I might not make great decisions but I'm smart and I know how to live. It's just a mess inside my head sometimes and the meds did level me out a little. Now that I'm not going to be on them, I'm nervous but I have a huge support system and I'm still seeing my psychiatrist regularly during this pregnancy.
Post by wrathofkuus on Sept 25, 2012 16:22:46 GMT -5
He just really, really scares me. I have a bad feeling about him, and the idea of something tying you to him permanently, something that would make it harder for you to leave on a moment's notice, scares me. I do understand that giving up a baby would be brutal, though.
Post by letyourselfgo on Sept 25, 2012 16:40:37 GMT -5
Hey Miss Lucy. Welcome back!
I'm on Team Be a Mom. I'm not cool with adoption in the cases of financial issues....especially when you're already in your late twenties. (Flame away....don't give a crap) Say, you gave a child up now....who's to say that you'll have the opportunity to have one at the "right" time?
My DD was born at a time when my and ExH had NO BUSINESS procreating. We were living hand to mouth and could barely feed ourselves. She certainly made us grow the heck up with the quickness. I probably would have still been the selfish little brat that I was at twenty two/three if she had not arrived. Probably with a few STI's and several abortions.
It's not up to our kids to save us.....but they certainly put things into the right prospective. I think that you guys will make great parents....and I wish you both lots of health and happiness.
I'm on Team Be a Mom. I'm not cool with adoption in the cases of financial issues....especially when you're already in your late twenties. (Flame away....don't give a crap) Say, you gave a child up now....who's to say that you'll have the opportunity to have one at the "right" time?
My DD was born at a time when my and ExH had NO BUSINESS procreating. We were living hand to mouth and could barely feed ourselves. She certainly made us grow the heck up with the quickness. I probably would have still been the selfish little brat that I was at twenty two/three if she had not arrived. Probably with a few STI's and several abortions.
It's not up to our kids to save us.....but they certainly put things into the right prospective. I think that you guys will make great parents....and I wish you both lots of health and happiness.
You are playing with fire, lady. Please please think long and hard about this before you make a decision. Where was this great support system when you needed a place to live?
Post by usedtobebear on Sept 25, 2012 18:07:43 GMT -5
Hmm... not sure what I think about this. I certainly think you are making positive changes in your life but having a baby is going to be really hard. I dealt with Infertilty for many years so hearing stories like this just blows my mind! Good luck to you!
Post by prettyinpearls on Sept 25, 2012 20:03:50 GMT -5
I quit smoking cold turkey when I found out I was pg with DS. He's perfectly fine. I guarantee you those 3 cigarettes a day are far worse for your unborn baby than any "nicotine addiction" there might be.
I like you L, I really do and I'm trying to come up with something productive to say. I know you didn't choose this baby and you're trying to make great improvements in your life. You're doing a great job. I'm proud of you. Now here's the tough love.
This baby is, in my opinion, not a good idea. I don't think that being tied to J for the rest of your life is a good thing. Hell, he can't even figure out how to get his student loans under control. I don't think you will listen but I think you should consider giving the baby up for adoption. I know you won't though because adoption is a selfless act and all you've shown is how selfish you are with your decisions in life. You got a dog, not because the dog needed you so badly, but because you wanted it. The same with this baby. You won't give it up because you don't care that you can't give it a good life. What business does someone have raising a child who they brought into the world addicted to a drug and being supported by government assistance? I say this from the perspective of someone who was adopted from a wonderfully selfless birth mother who knew that by giving me up she was giving me a better chance at life than she could ever provide for me. If I wasn't given up, I'd probably be named Candi, swinging from a pole with track marks on my arms and living with 3 kids in my trailer while collecting food stamps. Well, maybe not but I certainly wouldn't be where I am today.
I don't know why I even am writing this but I feel like I needed to get it out. I think you're being selfish. Actually you remind me of my XH right now (and with the dog). Story: When I left him we had a puppy. I knew that the puppy deserved a better life than to be raised by a single dog dad of two dogs. As a high energy breed, she would have been confined to a crate all day and taken for one walk. She would have destroyed his house, stressed him out and as a result, not been a happy dog. A tired dog is a happy dog. So I rehomed her to a family friend in NH who lived on 5 acres, had fields for her to run in and a great job to take her to everyday. Of course my douche of an XH was livid. Instead of realizing how selfless it would be to let the puppy literally live free in NH, he yelled, stomped and bought himself a new puppy. It's these things that show a test of your character. How you act when the opportunity for selflessness presents.
In this regard, you're failing in my eyes. It's not all about you. Really. It's not and you need to realize that. Life isn't always about buying new shoes or a car you can't afford because they will make you "happy" or adopting a dog when you can't feed yourself to have a sense of "family". It's about realizing that sometimes it's important to sacrifice your own happiness for the sake of others and learning how to be happy by being selfless.
Regardless, I wish you the best in whatever you decide. You'll hear no flames from me but I am disappointed in you. I hope you make a decision that you can live with and will fight like hell to make work. I hope you have a happy and a healthy pregnancy. No matter the circumstances, it's a wonderful time and I hope you can enjoy it.
I like you L, I really do and I'm trying to come up with something productive to say. I know you didn't choose this baby and you're trying to make great improvements in your life. You're doing a great job. I'm proud of you. Now here's the tough love.
This baby is, in my opinion, not a good idea. I don't think that being tied to J for the rest of your life is a good thing. Hell, he can't even figure out how to get his student loans under control. I don't think you will listen but I think you should consider giving the baby up for adoption. I know you won't though because adoption is a selfless act and all you've shown is how selfish you are with your decisions in life. You got a dog, not because the dog needed you so badly, but because you wanted it. The same with this baby. You won't give it up because you don't care that you can't give it a good life. What business does someone have raising a child who they brought into the world addicted to a drug and being supported by government assistance? I say this from the perspective of someone who was adopted from a wonderfully selfless birth mother who knew that by giving me up she was giving me a better chance at life than she could ever provide for me. If I wasn't given up, I'd probably be named Candi, swinging from a pole with track marks on my arms and living with 3 kids in my trailer while collecting food stamps. Well, maybe not but I certainly wouldn't be where I am today.
I don't know why I even am writing this but I feel like I needed to get it out. I think you're being selfish. Actually you remind me of my XH right now (and with the dog). Story: When I left him we had a puppy. I knew that the puppy deserved a better life than to be raised by a single dog dad of two dogs. As a high energy breed, she would have been confined to a crate all day and taken for one walk. She would have destroyed his house, stressed him out and as a result, not been a happy dog. A tired dog is a happy dog. So I rehomed her to a family friend in NH who lived on 5 acres, had fields for her to run in and a great job to take her to everyday. Of course my douche of an XH was livid. Instead of realizing how selfless it would be to let the puppy literally live free in NH, he yelled, stomped and bought himself a new puppy. It's these things that show a test of your character. How you act when the opportunity for selflessness presents.
In this regard, you're failing in my eyes. It's not all about you. Really. It's not and you need to realize that. Life isn't always about buying new shoes or a car you can't afford because they will make you "happy" or adopting a dog when you can't feed yourself to have a sense of "family". It's about realizing that sometimes it's important to sacrifice your own happiness for the sake of others and learning how to be happy by being selfless.
Regardless, I wish you the best in whatever you decide. You'll hear no flames from me but I am disappointed in you. I hope you make a decision that you can live with and will fight like hell to make work. I hope you have a happy and a healthy pregnancy. No matter the circumstances, it's a wonderful time and I hope you can enjoy it.
I am done with LFF or LOAJP, whoever she is.
But Mint, I HAD to respond to this post just because of you. You are AWESOME!!
I like you L, I really do and I'm trying to come up with something productive to say. I know you didn't choose this baby and you're trying to make great improvements in your life. You're doing a great job. I'm proud of you. Now here's the tough love.
This baby is, in my opinion, not a good idea. I don't think that being tied to J for the rest of your life is a good thing. Hell, he can't even figure out how to get his student loans under control. I don't think you will listen but I think you should consider giving the baby up for adoption. I know you won't though because adoption is a selfless act and all you've shown is how selfish you are with your decisions in life. You got a dog, not because the dog needed you so badly, but because you wanted it. The same with this baby. You won't give it up because you don't care that you can't give it a good life. What business does someone have raising a child who they brought into the world addicted to a drug and being supported by government assistance? I say this from the perspective of someone who was adopted from a wonderfully selfless birth mother who knew that by giving me up she was giving me a better chance at life than she could ever provide for me. If I wasn't given up, I'd probably be named Candi, swinging from a pole with track marks on my arms and living with 3 kids in my trailer while collecting food stamps. Well, maybe not but I certainly wouldn't be where I am today.
I don't know why I even am writing this but I feel like I needed to get it out. I think you're being selfish. Actually you remind me of my XH right now (and with the dog). Story: When I left him we had a puppy. I knew that the puppy deserved a better life than to be raised by a single dog dad of two dogs. As a high energy breed, she would have been confined to a crate all day and taken for one walk. She would have destroyed his house, stressed him out and as a result, not been a happy dog. A tired dog is a happy dog. So I rehomed her to a family friend in NH who lived on 5 acres, had fields for her to run in and a great job to take her to everyday. Of course my douche of an XH was livid. Instead of realizing how selfless it would be to let the puppy literally live free in NH, he yelled, stomped and bought himself a new puppy. It's these things that show a test of your character. How you act when the opportunity for selflessness presents.
In this regard, you're failing in my eyes. It's not all about you. Really. It's not and you need to realize that. Life isn't always about buying new shoes or a car you can't afford because they will make you "happy" or adopting a dog when you can't feed yourself to have a sense of "family". It's about realizing that sometimes it's important to sacrifice your own happiness for the sake of others and learning how to be happy by being selfless.
Regardless, I wish you the best in whatever you decide. You'll hear no flames from me but I am disappointed in you. I hope you make a decision that you can live with and will fight like hell to make work. I hope you have a happy and a healthy pregnancy. No matter the circumstances, it's a wonderful time and I hope you can enjoy it.
Why does anyone even BELIEVE anything she says? We all know she's a lying liar who lies. I doubt she's even pregnant.
I would very much like to believe she is completely made up. I'm pretty sure she's real, though, however I don't think any of us will ever know the whole truth.
My theory is that she got pregnant on purpose. She wanted a dog, she wanted a family...boom, have a baby!
Or it's another lie, to test the waters here and get attention, and soon there will be a "miscarriage."
DDD - agreed, she claims that someone else set up a fake SN to post the "fuck you all" to get her banned. Does she think we are idiots? I don't know who believes her IRL but it seems every word out of her mouth is a lie. Yeah, I question the truth with the pregnancy, as well. It's all an attention ploy. "What can I make up now?" Someone had posted "Bet now, she'll turn up preggers" or something to that and sure enough.....she's suddenly pregnant!
She's deleted now but I would put a ton o'money on it she'll be back in less than 24 hrs to lurk/read. Then, eventually she'll start posting again.
What is this with JM? Was she posing as the guy on here? I missed that.
WOWZA, I never saw that post. I was away this weekend and apparently missed that craziness - a good thing! Yeah, I'd put my life on that one that it was Lui - confirmed by the multiple times she deleted and set up new SNs just this week. JM cracked me up on his response. OK, ALL the responses had me LMAO. I am ALL set with her and you know, I am normally the first person IRL to reach out to a person in need thanks to all the amazing people who have done just that to help me get to where I've been during my life. But, you can't help someone who doesn't want to be helped. And you can't fix crazy.
Really hope (and kind of know) that the pregnancy is one of her dozen x 2 lies. Eh, I know it's a lie. Thank Gawd. God help the children being born to such instability already out there when there are so many amazing people out there wanting to be parents....with the means, the love and the selflessness so needed.
Out of control train wreck. How do you mess up a minimum wage job after a week or so? SMH
Yea as someone that struggled with and will continue to struggle with Infertility the fact that she's pregnant annoys the shit out of me. But that's my own issue.
Yea as someone that struggled with and will continue to struggle with Infertility the fact that she's pregnant annoys the shit out of me. But that's my own issue.
I, too, have struggled with infertility and I get how you are feeling. It sucks. I hesitated to add that in my last post for many reasons but mostly because I think she's full of baloney and it's a moot point. But, man if it were true, so many amazing people out there would make so much better parents and provide so much of a better life. Again, I believe she is lying, but if not, I sadly believe that the child will eventually be taken away for neglect of the basics.
I, too, have struggled with infertility and I get how you are feeling. It sucks. I hesitated to add that in my last post for many reasons but mostly because I think she's full of baloney and it's a moot point. But, man if it were true, so many amazing people out there would make so much better parents and provide so much of a better life. Again, I believe she is lying, but if not, I sadly believe that the child will eventually be taken away for neglect of the basics.
Hugs to you. I get it.
Hugs back to you!
Hugs to you both ({) (}) , life is so fricking unfair to the wrong people.