October Sports and Activities

[mae0111]

It's officially October... 

[mae0111]

DD1 is loving field hockey. She is the only 8th grader on a younger team. The A team coach approached her and offered her a spot on that team so that she could be with all of the other 8th graders, with the caveat that she probably wouldn't play much. She declined, saying that she really wanted to learn the game, so she wanted to be with the beginners. The head of school told me that the coaches were very impressed with her maturity around the decision. But she is loving the coaches and her teammates, and she's really having fun. She practices every day at home after school practices.

DD2 is playing a lot of soccer, but it's been frustrating to watch for the past few weeks. Her school team plays 11v11, there are 22 kids on the roster, and she barely gets any playing time. The coach keeps her favorites in, despite not being able to dribble, pass, shoot, or stop the other team. Last week she played 5 mins of the first half (30 min halves), and 7 mins of the second half. She's one of the youngest on the team, so I'm trying to keep that in mind.

Her club team is also frustrating. After we accepted her slot, the brought in 3-4 more kids, for a total of 18 kids playing 9v9. First week she played exactly half of the game. In her last 2 games, she only played about 15 mins. Kids with much less ability are playing more minutes in close games. I didn't think much about it last weekend because she was sick and not at her best, but yesterday she played really well and spent most of the game on the bench. I don't know if something happened. I want to ask the coach if there is an issue at practices or something. Her ADHD meds have definitely worn off by the time she hits practice, and I tend to stick around to make sure she's paying attention and not being disruptive. Would you ask?

There is a battle going on about the kids' upcoming piano recital. The piano teacher and DD1 want DD1 and DD2 to play a duet. DD2 does NOT want to play it. She cries every week. I'm about to tell her that she can't participate in the recital at all if she doesn't do the duet. There is NO REASON why she can't do it. She knows DD1 wants to do it, so she's being difficult and digging in her heels.

[librarychica]

It’s October! It is finally somewhat not scorching out.

The kids’ school running club kicked off this morning. They have been going the entire time they have been in school. DD1 is now helping to “coach” the littler ones. They need this, it’s such a good way to get some energy out before spending 7 hours in school.

Also going on activity-wise, DD2 is competing in math Olympics and has a role in the school play. DD1 is doing a whole lot of not much in the way of formal activities but she is finding things to keep herself busy.

[sdlaura]

As you call tell from my weekend updates, we have too many sports over here - but I expect that to be the story of my life for a long time with the four kids. I actually do really like watching the kids play and enjoy talking to and getting to know the other parents. DS2's kindergarten soccer team is the primary way I'm getting to know the new kindergarten parents. And it turns out that one of the families we know through softball and baseball is going to be renting a condo in the same building as us when we go to Hawaii for fall break, along with a bunch of families they're friends with from their elementary school. So that should be really fun for our kids to have playmates (DH is worried that those parents party harder than we do, but we have the excuse of a 3- and 6-year-old to get us out of any later night stuff). And actually, DS2's soccer teammate/classmate's family will be at the other resort next door. So that should make fall break more fun. And we met and got to know all those people through the kids' sports.

Anyway, DH and I are still kind of on the fence about whether DD's travel softball makes sense for our family. One day out of every weekend, and sometimes both days, one parent is gone at least 8 hours while she plays 3 softball games in a row, usually a decent distance from our house. But it is amazing the progress she and her team are making by playing so much, so I'm starting to see the value of it. Like DD is only an OK hitter, and usually she's relatively far down the line-up. So some games she only gets a couple of chances to hit. When she was only playing one game a week in rec softball, that's really not enough live game hitting practice to truly get better. In the last month since she started travel softball, her team has played 14 games and the opposing pitchers really present a challenge. All that hitting practice seems to be paying off. I think all the reps are meaning she's less nervous when she does get up there. She's having a lot of fun on her new team.

[cjcouple]

Both boys are in full swing with their HS sport seasons.  

DS1 had his senior portraits done by a local dad photographer.  He worked with the school AD and is doing them free for all Seniors this year.  I cannot wait to see them!!
They had a Bye week last week which was good because we ended up with about 10 inju8red players from last weeks game.  A handful were still on concussion protocol over the weekend.  

DS2 also had a bye week for cross country.  He has 2 meets this week.  He is loving it.  He is last in every race but I am really proud of him for never giving up.  He has the drive for sure but just needs to figure out how to widen his stride and shorten his time.  It has been raining so much lately, and he is out there running in it.  He is completely drenched but isn't complaining. He's making some new friends through XC so that's great

He's also in pretty intense training for green belt in karate 3 days a week.  So quite the busy bee

[madringal]

DD1 & 3 have their first club meet this weekend. So it will be good to see where they are in comparison to how they ended their last season.

DD2 has her last regular season gymnastics meet tonight and then conference championship next week.

[186momx]

madringal, how did DD2's school gymnastics season go?

DD is having a private lesson with the head coach on Wednesday. I will update afterwards.

There is a girl at gymnastics that is drama queen (S) and seems to constantly be spreading rumors, putting others down, or just getting the girls in trouble for talking, goofing off, etc. Friday she was telling the level 3 group that DD and J wore pushup bras to practice making their boobs look bigger so that they could attract attention to themselves. DD was pissed when one of the girls came up and said, "S is telling all the 3s this and it is just wrong". DD is hoping that J will go with her to talk to head coach Tuesday night as S was body shamming them even if it wasn't directly to their faces.

[madringal]

186momx well, the team isn't so great in terms of winning or anything, lol. They are for sure all just kind of learning. But everyone of them has been improving. At their first meet, only two of them competed in vault because no one else had the skill (DD included) and last night all 7 of them were able to complete it! By the 2nd meet, DD attempted it, but failed and scored 0. And last night, she tried it again, nailed it and got a 6.5! Every week her AR PR just continues to get better (although she had a rough go on the bar and forgot to do a skill on the beam last night). So overall, we are counting this season as a success and I am sure she will do it again next year!

[dglvrk2]

madringal, 186momx, what aerobic activities do your D's do at gymnastics? DD1's team has to run 2 miles one time a week. I don't disagree. There was no build up to this (started in August) and she's struggling with it. I'm wondering if I should say something to the coach - acknowledge that D is struggling and see what the coach says - or just let it be.

DD1 continues with gymnastics practices 3x/week plus an occasional private lesson. She's expressed an interest in volleyball. Joining a club team would either take her away from gymnastics once a week (frowned upon by the coaches) or she'd have to miss some of the volleyball practices. I'd love her to experience a team sport. I'm not sure if it's conducive with her gymnastics obligations right now though. Thoughts?

DD2's soccer season is wrapping up; only 3 more games then a mini-tournament. Once soccer is finished, she'll only have martial arts twice a week until January when ski team starts. She's taking an after school photography class that goes through December. I'm trying to think of other creative things to fill her bucket, but that don't overlap with martial arts and, eventually, skiing. She's continuing with Girl Scouts, so that's a montly obligation at this point.

[dglvrk2]

Oct 2, 2023 16:54:29 GMT -5 186momx said:

madringal , how did DD2's school gymnastics season go?

DD is having a private lesson with the head coach on Wednesday. I will update afterwards.

There is a girl at gymnastics that is drama queen (S) and seems to constantly be spreading rumors, putting others down, or just getting the girls in trouble for talking, goofing off, etc. Friday she was telling the level 3 group that DD and J wore pushup bras to practice making their boobs look bigger so that they could attract attention to themselves. DD was pissed when one of the girls came up and said, "S is telling all the 3s this and it is just wrong". DD is hoping that J will go with her to talk to head coach Tuesday night as S was body shamming them even if it wasn't directly to their faces.

Ugghhh....I'm sorry this is happening to your DD   Has she considered talking to her coach?  As I recall from your previous posts, teasing and other drama are somewhat ongoing.  Seems like your daughter is handling it well too. 

[mae0111]

I ended up reaching out to her club coach about her playing time. He benched her because she was fooling around on the sidelines. I'm not surprised. She's a super goofy kid and I keep telling her that her attitude is going to be a problem.

I'm pretty pissed off. I spend so much of my time getting her to these practices/games/tournaments and she's benched because she can't keep her goofiness in check.

Her coach was lovely about it though. He's a 4th grade teacher and can deal really well with this. But he's going to prioritize the kids that are working hard and taking the game seriously.

Ugh. I'm not looking forward to yet another conversation with DD2 about this. It's not the first time she's been benched for this.

[madringal]

dglvrk2 None? Lol. They run around the floor for a few laps but that is it. I am pretty anti club gymnastics, so DD doesn't compete on a club team, just her MS team. She did club gymnastics/team a few years ago and I quickly realized it is not the life for us. At all. She has been competing on a club diving team for the past 2 years and LOVES it. Loves! Typically in-between diving seasons she just does a once a week rec gymnastics class to stay stretched out keep up her tumbling skills. This is the first time in 10+ years that our MS has put together a gymnastics team, so she wanted to try it out. It is SOOO much better than club. Way more chill. Way more our speed.

[186momx]

dglvrk2, no running. The gym is in an industrial area with no sidewalks. It wouldn't be safe for the girls to run and our gym is tiny so no room inside. During the summer we had an extra 30 minutes of practice where they spent the entire 30 minutes doing cardio. DD misses it now that they don't have the time to do it.

Teasing/drama...her normal coach lectures the group as a whole but won't pull aside the instigator and reprimand them. This is why I suggested for DD to talk to the head coach who is also in charge of the gym as a whole.

mae0111, that sucks and being benched and sitting on the side even more probably isn't actually help solve the goofy problem. Could the coach give her a job while she is on the sidelines to keep her focused?

[soccermama]

DD's high school volleyball has been going really well. Busy, but great! I think her team's record is like 8-3 or something like that? It has been amazing to see how much she has grown into the sport and that she loves it. She was also invited to play on a club team, and that will start to ramp up more at the beginning of November. I am excited for her to do it, I just hope our family can handle to logistics of it all (yikes).

DS is playing rec soccer and that has been a little frustrating. His team is struggling and I feel like it can be a little disheartening for the kids to lose every week when they play so hard! He still loves the game and so we will continue to encourage.

[mae0111]

186momx, that's a good idea. I will think about that and chat with him about it. I know that one of her teachers used to do that for her and it helped a lot.

He really wants them to watch the game and pay attention to what's happening - it's a great way to learn. But she has to do something to keep her busy while she watching. I'm not even sure that she has noticed that she's slipped from a starting position to barely playing 1/4 of the game.

My ADHD was not diagnosed at that age, and I still remember paying attention to what was happening on the court when I wasn't in the game, so that I knew who was scoring, who was fast, how the refs were calling the game. Cheer my teammates on. She's old enough to know that she should be watching. Maybe I can talk to the coach about letting her do some simple foot skills exercises on the sidelines when there's room (often there isn't).

On another note, I hope your DD can get the gym thing straightened out. It's really frustrating when the coaches don't handle this stuff. This stuff started happening on DD2's club team last year, and the coach addressed it immediately, as it was happening. It was easy because he heard it.

As a youth coach for many years, the only thing that would get you benched on my team was a bad attitude - being disrespectful to coaches, players, refs/umps, or the other team. If I addressed attitudes and they didn't improve, I would not let the kids compete (assuming I was within the rules to bench them). I have and would 100% bench my own kid for a bad attitude, and would have no hesitation benching another kid.

[mommyatty]

mae0111- could you send a fidget or something with her? Or have her keep stats for the coach while she’s on the bench (who touched the ball, passes, goals, assists, fouls, corner kicks, throw ins)? I agree that asking her to just pay attention isn’t working. It’s not within her current abilities. It was barely within my abilities when I played in high school.

[campermom]

Oldest Ds is a freshman and started strength workouts with the baseball team twice a week. Boyfriend moved some equipment into the garage so on off says he’s doing that. He took a season off to “bulk” (sounds expensive lol) lots of meat and protein and rice!


He did an all day showcase w coaches from a bunch of colleges, just because-not serious, but still a positive for him.
Dd (7th) is playing Rec field hockey w practice twice a week and games once a week. This league isn’t doing tournament which is fine by us.

Little DS (3rd grade) does karate at my gym twice a week.

We are all pretty even keel right now. I’m able to manage all logistics by myself except one day a week pick up, and I have my parents, my sister and I’ve had my boyfriend do it once.

It feels good to be in a place where everything is not only covered, but also very enjoyable. My new work schedule adjusted by two hours earlier and has been better for everyone especially me. I would have been so stressed and completely unable to do this if I hadn’t made the switch.

[mae0111]

mommyatty , I don't think a fidget would be enough. I think she needs to move, but it's hard to move and pay attention to the game. I wonder if it would be enough for her to just pace/skip along the sidelines while she's watching.

I wish I had her energy LOL. This perimenopause belly I've developed would melt away if I was a body in perpetual motion...

[186momx]

DD had a really good private lesson with the head coach yesterday. She successfully did her kip/cast/squat-on/jump connected for the 1st time. They worked on her jump a lot and spent a good 20 minutes on bars. They actually worked on all 4 events to just see where she was at. I saw improvement on vault as the spent time on her run and approach. DD had the biggest smile on her face and she was so sweaty by the time the hour was up and they scheduled another one next week. Her coaches were there coaching another level and that kind of bugged DD because they kept staring at her.

[mae0111]

Dd2 had a tournament this weekend for her club. The team unfortunately played really poorly. I don’t quite understand what has happened to them between the first game and now, but they kind of fell off a cliff. And then they started to turn on each other.

The good news is that DD2 got a significant amount of playing time since our chat about her behavior on the sidelines. She had 2 great games today in my opinion. She worked super hard and never gave up.

I’m going to talk to the coach about the negative talk. It was mostly the kid that did the same thing during an earlier tournament, and he addressed it quickly.

[sdlaura]

I got my kids flu shots yesterday and I don’t know if it was that or just general tiredness, but they were really dragging yesterday afternoon. DS1 could barely motivate himself to get out of the car for his soccer game at 4:10….and then played better than he ever has? He had a ton of energy and every time he kicked the ball, it seemed to go far and where he wanted it to. So that was exciting? The coaches and other parents noticed too - they’re like ‘wow, maybe you should get him a flu shot every week!’

It took DH and DD 2.5 hours to get to her softball games today. It should have been a little over an hour away, but there was a bad accident through Camp Pendleton between San Diego and Orange County, and there was really no way to avoid that route. DH already thinks we’re devoting too much time to her travel softball, so he was thrilled She didn’t play awesome, but her team won two of the three games so that was nice. And the drive home wasn’t bad.

It just so happens that there’s no softball when DH and I are out of town next weekend. We’ll have friends take DD to her Friday night flag football game and Saturday soccer game. My parents will handle the two boys’ soccer games Saturday and DS1’s baseball game Sunday. Luckily they’ve been to other games at all the places and the locations are close, so hopefully they’ll be ok 🤞🏻

[erbear]

School soccer season is just about over and while I cannot wait to have our afternoons back, I'm sad for DD1. Varsity in high school has been such a great experience for her as a 9th grader and she's going to miss it a lot. I have high hopes that the older kids who she worships will talk her into lacrosse in the spring. DD2's middle school team is unwatchably bad so good riddance -- it's really hard to see.

Club soccer has another month or so. DD1's team is small (only 12-13 players who consistently show) but they are definitely improving. They looked great in the last game. DD2's team still sucks but she got asked to play with the A team in a tournament this weekend and she did awesome -- got a lot of playing time, had 4 assists in the 4 games they played, and they won the tournament, which was nice for her since her teams never win anything, lol.

[madringal]

We had our first club meet of the swim season this past weekend. Our team doesn't do a lot of travel meets, but this was one, and we went to it. Not sure it was worth the $800 for 2 days of swim, but alas, it is what it is.

DD1 - meh, they are ramping up their yards on the HS team so her legs were shot. Some decent swims, nothing great. Was to be expected.

DD3 - She was the only 10U to swim the meet from our team (and she is just 7), and oh my gosh was she the cutest thing you have ever seen? She swam the 25 butterfly for the first time and was all pumped to do it. Got her warm up in, was reminded like 15 times to swim fly, took off at the start, great start, great streamline, great underwater, and popped up and swam freestyle! Lol! And then about 10 yards in realized the other kids were doing fly so she switched. It was so stinking cute! 25 back and 50 free looked great and she placed 8th and 4th for the 8U with some big time drops.

Photo proof of little swimmer cuteness! Sorry if its huge.

[mae0111]

So I reached out to DD2's club coach... first I asked him if he noticed a difference in DD2's behavior. I assumed that he had, since she got quite a bit of playing time over the tournament weekend. But I also asked him if he could chat with the team about building teammates up instead of tearing them down, remind them to be positive and encourage their teammates. He wasn't at the team's last game, which is when I thought the behavior got out of control.

He responded that he's received similar reports from other parents, and he was horrified by the behavior of some of the kids. He said he didn't run his team like that (which I already knew), and that he would be addressing it at the next practice. DD2 has to miss practice for a game for another team, but I told him to just let me know if there was anything I needed to pass along to her. I hope things improve.

ETA I forgot to add that he said he was really impressed with DD2's behavior during the tournament.  She didn't join in when the other kids got disruptive and silly, and was ready to go in when he called her.  So... she's got it in her to focus when she needs to, so that's good!

[librarychica]

It’s not a formal sport but October marks the time where I start wanting to kayak as many weekends as possible. For the first time, we did a run with DD1 in her own kayak. DD2 got to take a more active role since her sister wasn’t also squeezed in the tandem with me (I have one with a jump seat for a smaller child or dog). It was wonderful. DD1 loved having the freedom and control over her own boat. She did spring ahead a few times and get out of my sight — not a problem on a popular run like we were on but if we let her solo kayak in more remote areas she is getting a lecture and a can of pepper spray — and once or twice she got stuck in a twist and had to get out and push. But overall, success.

[mustardseed2007]

DS got Scrooge in the Tiny Tim's Christmas Carol play he is doing with his afterschool theater group! I am so thrilled that it seems like all his effort towards improving through extra, supportive classes. Especially because I really thought he would loose out on Scrooge to the taller, older boy who is also very good.

This is especially good because he is missing some school fun activities because of theater -- he's missing steam night at school next week for play practice and he's missing most of the fall carnival for his cabaret show case - he'll be there for the last 90 minutes I think. But I know being cast in a lead roll is going to make all that go down a lot smoother because this kid LIVES for the validation of an applauding crowd and getting cast in great roles.

[186momx]

mustardseed2007, that is awesome news

How do you all balance sports with random school stuff? DD wants to go to the school carnival in a couple weeks that is from 6-8. She has practice from 4-7 so I told her I would pull her from practice 30 minutes early and she could go for the last hour of the carnival. We didn't go last year to any of the special school events (movie night, BINGO, carnival) because they were all from 4-6 and DD didn't want to miss a whole practice.

[sdlaura]

186momx that’s exactly how we handle stuff like that. Sometimes for a school or other fun thing, and sometimes for sports. DD plays multiple sports so is often leaving one a little early or arriving at one a little late so she can make both practices.

We had an 8-night vacation booked during our kids’ fall break and then DD ended up having tournaments both weekends. So we rescheduled the trip to only miss one of the tournaments and asked the coach which one would cause less of an issue.

[waverly]

186momx , Random school stuff is usually right after school or Friday night, and we don't have practice after school/ Fridays. So it typically works out, but the school did cancel all extra-curriculars for the one that had right after school, so she was able to skip band and go to it since both were through the school.

I do have a conflict with soccer practice and Girl Scouts once a month. Last year, I made her go every other month to Girl Scouts. This year, she doesn't want to do 2 G.S. field trips, so I am having her go to the November meeting. So it sort of depends on her interest and the topic and what I think she will get out of it. This is her last year in Girl Scouts, so she is kind of over it meh about it, but still gets something out of it, so we are doing one last loop around all the stuff and then calling it.

I would probably handle practice/ carnival the same as long as the coach doesn't mind her getting pulled. I've had a few that were upset with me for pulling DS from a 1st grade BB game, but DH was traveling for work and I had to pick DD up from somewhere, so what can you do?  I didn't know anyone to car pool with.  

[mustardseed2007]

186momx, that is normally how I would handle stuff like that. If he only had a normal play practice and I could pull him early, I would pull him and take him to the carnival or steam night.

Unfortunately, he has his tech rehearsal and show that this whole class has been building up to 10am-2:15pm. Carnival is 12-4pm. So we're going straight from the performance to the carnival. Luckily they are close, about 15 minutes apart.

Steam night next week is after school 5-6:30pm (terrible timing!!). He has his first play practice 4-7pm. Since it's his first one and he has a lead role, my feeling is he's going to need to skip steam night. There's a lot of expectation setting that happens in that first practice and quite frankly getting cast in lead roles is not only about being good, it's about being reliable and committed. Although please tell me if I'm being terrible....I wasn't going to give him a choice but I do suspect if I did give him a choice he would be mad at the conflict but would choose play practice...maybe I should give him a choice?