We got married in September for health insurance reasons. We just went to the court house in Brooklyn with a friend of my H who was free that day to be our witness. We were already engaged when we realized this was necessary and urgent.
We're still having the celebration we planned in the spring with about 20 people - ceremony and lunch at a really old hotel right in the Delaware River in PA. The plan is to host an after party for our local family and friends but I'm aiming for as low key as possible.
My first wedding was pretty big and I'd have been fine with a true elopement, but this is important for H. I'm making (knitting) my own dress for it, though, which I'm really excited about.
Thankfully my company allows you to put domestic partners on health insurance, if not we would’ve gotten married many years ago! He had a plan through the ACA but the price increasingly went up and I think it was $800 by the time he got on mine :/
Both of ours do too, but I needed surgery with an out of network provider and the plan I had for work only covered the hospital system I work for. We had to have a qualifying event. So we added his plan and now we both have two insurance plans. 😐 If I wasn't cheap, I could have had the appropriate coverage when I started working there in March. (I was planning on dealing with this surgery thing next year, but my body had different plans.)
I just attended an elopement! We met our friends in Vegas (only myself, SO, and the bride and groom’s parents attended) - they went the entire week of Thanksgiving but we were only there Tuesday - Thursday.
Tuesday night we all went out for dinner, the girls and guys split for a bit, then we came back together to do the High Roller. Wednesday evening was the wedding at the chapel, and we were supposed to go out to dinner after but SO and I had to bow out of that because I ate Del Taco after the High Roller the night before and had horrible food poisoning all day. I stuck it out through the wedding then went to the ER immediately after the ceremony.
We flew back home on Thanksgiving, but they stayed and had dinner at the Excalibur. The wedding was pretty, and fast! They did a bit of paperwork, we went upstairs to the terrace for the ceremony, then we all took some pictures. The chapel streamed it for folks back home.
Post by litskispeciality on Dec 1, 2023 12:10:28 GMT -5
I know a number of people who've eloped. Pre-COVID one couple got married at a beau-ti-ful resort in the DR and had a surprisingly high number of people fly out. They later had a big party in the U.S. for those who couldn't make it. My girlfriend and her husband got married in a literal bookstore (because that's where they met) with their parents and maybe a couple of siblings. Family pressure lead to a beautiful (and expensive) ceremony and reception a year later.
COVID lockdown and current, more and more couples in my world are realizing it's easier (and cheaper) not to have the huge party. I've seen small ceremonies with maybe 10 people in the woods or somewhere special to them, even married on top of a mountain. Still had a beautiful dress and/or suit, had a photo, decorations. Another couple got married in "secret" at a restrurant with just immediate family, then announced the wedding on their 1st anniversary. They planned to have a party after 1 year, but bought a house and had a kid, and well it's just not important/not in the budget anymore.
All that to say that the landscape seems to be changing and if you're ok with something small and no follow up party, it seems to be socially ok*. Looking back too I love the idea of getting married in the woods or somewhere special to you. We loved our outdoor venue, but could have saved thousands...
Congratulations!
*A couple should be able to get legally married and never celebrate with a big expensive thing. I just mean hopefully people are being nicer to couples now if they don't spring for an expensive party.
Post by litskispeciality on Dec 1, 2023 12:11:11 GMT -5
Oh and one of my husband's sisters weddings was in Vegas with a live stream to the ceremony about 13 years ago. I imagine the technology is way better if you and your partner (and probably child) want to travel somewhere but still want family to see the ceremony <3
Post by silvercrayon on Dec 2, 2023 1:25:38 GMT -5
We were married at the courthouse with DH's parents, his sister, my mom and my best friend and her DH. My best friend made us a cake and we hand punch and cake at her house afterwards. It was perfect! No regrets!