After I delivered, the attending OB (not my usual one) was trying to make small talk while stitching my tear. She asked what I did for a living. I responded "lawyer" & she said "No way! You are the calmest lawyer I have ever met!" It made me wonder how crazy other lawyers get during labor.
The OB that delivered me last night is hysterical.
First: he looks about 13. His ties are always a little too long and he looks like he's wearing his dad's clothes.
Then...he is like a walking Ryan Gosling meme. Literally. Last night, I am on hour 3.5 of pushing, epidural has worn off, and yelling "get this kid out of me NOW," and he goes, "Girl, you know I could use forceps or a vacuum but there are risks to your baby, and I know you are strong enough to push this baby out!"
Then this morning on rounds, I got a "hey girl, how are you feeling today?" He is just so adorable. I want to put him in my pocket.
My OB stopped accepting my insurance so I asked for a rec from some of the girls at my law firm where I was clerking during my second year of law school. One of the girls recommended Dr. A, so I gave him a shot. His name sounded familiar but I couldn't place it. I get to his office, strip down for the exam and get on the table. About 5 minutes later in walks one of my law school classmates. Apparently this overachiever was an OB AND was going for his JD. Very awkward gyno exam, even more awkward morning of classes the following day.
Then...he is like a walking Ryan Gosling meme. Literally. Last night, I am on hour 3.5 of pushing, epidural has worn off, and yelling "get this kid out of me NOW," and he goes, "Girl, you know I could use forceps or a vacuum but there are risks to your baby, and I know you are strong enough to push this baby out!"
Then this morning on rounds, I got a "hey girl, how are you feeling today?" He is just so adorable. I want to put him in my pocket.
I had an OB who looked like Harrison Ford. He knew I thought that. Whenever he gave me my annual exam, he would hum the Indiana Jones music to fuck with me.
That is hilarious!
All of my stories involve people in the waiting room. The first few appointments I went to when I was pregnant involved a couple screaming or swearing at each other.
Post by karinothing on Sept 27, 2012 7:46:07 GMT -5
My story is not that funny but it was almost embarssing. I went to an OB appointment and I was told that one of the students was going to be looking in today. I was fine with that. Except when he entered, I realized he was my classmates hot boyfriend. Needless to say, I excused him from the room!
Another good one: the "congrats you're pregnant" pamphlet from the obgyn talks about all the things you can/can not do. Sex, exercise, etc. it also states, in BOLD print "DO NOT blow forcefully into the vagina."
I didn't know that was a thing...
We had a woman who repeatedly had free air in her abdomen, a couple of times so bad that she required surgery to remove it. The resident had to get a really detailed sexual history (he said he didn't know whose face was redder--his or the patient's) and it turns out that her FI liked to blow air in her vagina, apparently hard enough that it entered her uterus and then escaped out into her pelvic and abdominal cavities.
ok...TMI warning...I have 2 stories, you can enjoy the first and the look away for the 2nd...oh wait, there will be a bonus 3rd if you make it through 2nd
1st: My sister referred me and he sent her a thank you note...we could not make out if he signed it "fondly your or fondling yours"...dr's handwriting left this too close for comfort
2nd: I lactate, I have since the 11th grade...I told him about it during the breast exam and he said "oh, that's doubtful" as he gave my nipple a squeeze...sure enough, milk squirts out, shoots me in the eye...and the nurse held the clipboard over her head for protection. 1st appointment ever by the way
Bonus 3rd: After the above 1st GYN appointment ever...he sat me up and said "you smell like roses"
I went to a new new gyn when I was 19 or 20 to get my annual exam. I told her I was having a lot of issues with irregular periods, cramps, random bleeding, etc. I also told her that I was a little paranoid and pretty cautious because my mom, aunt, and grandmother have all had cancer in some part of their lady bits and my sister and cousin had "pre-cancerous cells."
She said, "You shouldn't be worried unless you're sleeping around, cancer is not hereditary, it's caused by HPV, which is an STD that you get from sleeping with multiple people."
So, I come from a family of tramps, I'll be sure to tell them all that's why they got cancer. Thanks doc!
She said, "You shouldn't be worried unless you're sleeping around, cancer is not hereditary, it's caused by HPV, which is an STD that you get from sleeping with multiple people."
I went to a new new gyn when I was 19 or 20 to get my annual exam. I told her I was having a lot of issues with irregular periods, cramps, random bleeding, etc. I also told her that I was a little paranoid and pretty cautious because my mom, aunt, and grandmother have all had cancer in some part of their lady bits and my sister and cousin had "pre-cancerous cells."
She said, "You shouldn't be worried unless you're sleeping around, cancer is not hereditary, it's caused by HPV, which is an STD that you get from sleeping with multiple people."
So, I come from a family of tramps, I'll be sure to tell them all that's why they got cancer. Thanks doc!
I saw a jerky/judgy doctor OBGYN like this. I was young, in college, and scared - what biotch.
My latest OBGYN was an octogenarian who wore cute bowties.
I had a really awesome dr from our practice for our delivery. We were listening to Sirius radio on our laptop for music during labor. The Ob also had a Sirius account. Once C was born and everything was pretty much settled, the Ob walked in with a print out--he went to the Sirius website and printed out the playlist of songs that played for the final 4 hrs while C was being born. It was so touching, and if I ever were pregnant again I'd ask for him to be my direct dr again in a heartbeat.
I told my obgyn that I had some spotting after intercourse. The doctor said that maybe it was because of my H's package size..with a smirk on her face.
Post by hannamaren on Sept 27, 2012 13:53:11 GMT -5
My friend was told by a doctor that she must be having anal sex and that was why she was havingso many bladder infections. My friend insisted she was not having anal sex. The doctor just gave her a "sure, honey" look.
I had a midwife tell me I was built to birth 10 pounders (I'm 6' so have a big frame). I've also gotten the beautiful cervix comment.
TMI warning!!!
When having DS, I labored in the shower once we got to the hospital. I was starting to get the urge to push, so was making my way back to the bed. All of a sudden I started projectile vomiting all over the place. The nurse and midwife are trying to hold those blue accordian puke bags and I yell "I'm going to poop on the floor!" Yep, totally shit on the hospital floor and the nurse's crocs (she later commented that she was glad she wore her crocs so she could go wash them off). The good news is I climbed on the bed and DS was out in 3 pushes.
I was seeing my OB after my ablation. I had some bleed issues she hadn't dealt with before so she wanted to do an ultrasound. A vaginal ultrasound. With her nurse, another doctor, his nurse and at least one other person in the room. I had six people standing in a semi-circle staring at my cooter and the monitor as she adjusted.
Post by benitabutrell on Sept 27, 2012 18:53:34 GMT -5
My first u/s with DD was transvaginal, so naturally at my nt scan I went to drop my pants. The u/s tech looked at me and asked what I was doing as I had my jeans around my ankles and my underwear ready to come down. Yeah, that second one and each there after were abdominal ultrasounds. Oops.