I get the impression that you're a really thoughtful, generous person. Not just from this post, but in general.
I think if you want to control your budget, you're going to have to be less nice ;D
Your examples alone are about 1k spent on others, between the gifts, stuff for your DS, and donations. There is nothing wrong with any of that, but if you feel like your budget is off the rails these are probably the easiest way to cut back.
I don't recall the specifics of your budget post, but I recall your budget wasn't too crazy. I think reigning in your spending on others and making sure you are really making purchases you need/don't have other options for (wasn't it you that has the expensive gym membership? If so, why the need for $100 workout DVDs?) will help.
I really just don't do anything that requires that much money, I guess. I rarely get my hair done, DH surprises me with a mani/pedi a couple times a year, I usually choose the free or extremely cheap books on my Kindle, I'm not into any hobbies that require constant input of money, etc.
We get $100 each for fun money each month. I rarely spend it all and when I do spend it, it's usually on home stuff or clothes DD doesn't REALLY need
FWIW, I don't include lunches/dinners in this total. Like miso said, you have to eat to live!
If you adjust your budget to have these catagories Clothing: dresses from target and some house bras - $90 Gym: insanity dvds - $100 Baby: toys and books for baby at walmart and target - $100 Gifts: birthday gifts, wedding gifts $600
Then you spent $0 fun money this week. Truthfully though I dont know how people do it. I once spent $25 on one cocktail. It was delicious.
One tip that I read somewhere is to delete your credit card info from all the websites you like to shop from. Having to enter your information all the time gives you more time to really think about whether you need another sweater or pair of shoes or whatever. I've found this to be true.
Post by hannamaren on Sept 27, 2012 7:29:17 GMT -5
Every time I take my kid out, I am tempted to buy her stuff. But I dont. No more room, she doesnt even play with the stuff she has and I dont want her to think she always gets stuff. It is hard. I love buying stuff.
If you adjust your budget to have these catagories Clothing: dresses from target and some house bras - $90 Gym: insanity dvds - $100 Baby: toys and books for baby at walmart and target - $100 Gifts: birthday gifts, wedding gifts $600
Then you spent $0 fun money this week. Truthfully though I dont know how people do it. I once spent $25 on one cocktail. It was delicious.
Post by liveintheville on Sept 27, 2012 7:59:52 GMT -5
Yeah. I cheat and don't consider those things as part of my "fun money."
Food, be it eaten in or out is a necessity, otherwise my coffee habit alone would screw me. And the $35 dollars I spent on a cocktail and cheese plate last night, I'm not counting
Post by mrssavy42112 on Sept 27, 2012 8:06:44 GMT -5
I hate threads like this. It always makes people like myself feel bad when there are people on here who turn their nose up to the idea of spending less. Like others have said, if you have it, then you can spend it. But if you don't have it, then you can't spend it. Doesn't make anyone better than anyone else.
My fun money would be for anything that doesn't benefit our household. So any lunches, coffees, clothes, shoes, makeup, hair... It's not part of our joint budget. I bring lunch daily & eat dinner home. Haven't bought new clothes/shoes in months. We take $30 every 2 weeks & I use mine on coffee & the occasional lunch. We're not in a position to donate to charities right now, so we don't. I wish we could.
Post by morningmania on Sept 27, 2012 8:17:01 GMT -5
I can easily spend under $25 in a week or two. I do not consider going out to eat unless it is for just me part of my fun money. I typically only allow myself one meal and one coffee out per week, some times I don't take that. Although, there are some weeks that I can spend over $100.
I hate threads like this. It always makes people like myself feel bad when there are people on here who turn their nose up to the idea of spending less. Like others have said, if you have it, then you can spend it. But if you don't have it, then you can't spend it. Doesn't make anyone better than anyone else.
My fun money would be for anything that doesn't benefit our household. So any lunches, coffees, clothes, shoes, makeup, hair... It's not part of our joint budget. I bring lunch daily & eat dinner home. Haven't bought new clothes/shoes in months. We take $30 every 2 weeks & I use mine on coffee & the occasional lunch. We're not in a position to donate to charities right now, so we don't. I wish we could.
Don't worry, you're not alone.
We have $50/mo fun money each because that's what works in our budget right now. Could we increase that so we could buy more stuff we don't need? Sure. But it would decrease what we put toward joint stuff, baby fund, vacation fund, etc. In the last couple of years when we were paying off our cc debt I really learned a lot about making sure I really wanted something before I bought it. I used to buy a lot of stuff just because I wanted it, and now I don't do that much anymore. Every now and then, sure. But for the most part I make better decisions.
Post by whitepicketfence on Sept 27, 2012 9:21:08 GMT -5
We don't even get fun money anymore. We know we don't have much to spend at the moment so we don't. If we really want something, we'll quickly discuss it and see if we can fit it into our budget. We're trying to pay off cc debt, have two kids, and are a one income family. There's only so much money to go around so we make due with what we have.
And, yes, I read many library books and play outside with the kids/dog a lot
I'm in the party of mixed feelings on this thread. I get that there is a lot of bantering going on and it was meant (maybe?) to be taken light hearted. Not to mention completely different lifestyle and budget. I just wish I had $25/month to spend freely. Its tight for us right now; way too tight really. I mentioned to DH just last night that one of us may need to get a 2nd job - even if only just through the holidays - to get some stupid cc bills paid off so we can have a little more breathing room.
Post by pantsparty on Sept 27, 2012 9:59:08 GMT -5
Stop buying Polo onesies
Okay, in reality, while some of the things you're spending money on are for you (Insanity DVDs, your "house" bras), other things should fall into your shared budget, like charity contributions and grocery shopping. This really boils down to the way that you and H have your money divided and how you have not made changes with you working less.
I go through peaks and valleys myself - sometimes H and I go out and we have a spendy weekend, or I go shopping. During the week, since I work at home, I usually eat at home as well. You're not going out and spending tons of money, IMO.
Post by marchmom06 on Sept 27, 2012 10:38:32 GMT -5
My spending varies quite a bit, but there are plenty of months where I spend in the neighborhood of $100 or less on fun money.
-Rarely get coffee. We invested in a fancy (& $$) espresso machine 7 years ago & use that for basically all coffee unless we're traveling. -Rarely eat lunch out. I work a condensed day & don't want to be away from my desk at lunch time. Also, there are no tempting restaurants near me & the cafeteria sucks. I will buy soup if I'm desperate & I've forgotten my lunch, but that's mostly a health issue (trying to keep calories in check). -I go in fits & spurts with clothes, but have really tried to limit what I buy.
We're busy with the boys, work & activities, so I don't have time to do a lot of things that I would enjoy spending money on. We go on one date night/month, & that's the majority of our dining out budget.
Do you track your spending? It was a huge eye opener for me. I have an Excel spreadsheet that was initially complicated to build, but is a breeze to maintain. Maybe something like that?
Where I do spend my money? -Race registrations (just about to send in my $120 check for Hood to Coast next year) -Running shoes -Running related crap -Traveling. We go way crazy when we travel & spend a huge portion of our disposable income on trips. Works for us. -Our house. We intentionally bought a house that stretched our income, knowing that we'd have to cut back in many other categories & not fritter our money away. It worked. -Kids activities. That stuff is not cheap. We do one activity or sport per season, per kid. It's still a ton of money.
This is not a case of a person who has to scrimp and save to survive.
This is a case of a person who makes a good living but buys a lot of useless shit and has a partner who also makes a good living but is a dick.
No need to wah wah wah about about completely different circumstances.
No, but there are others who come off as very ‘OMFG, I could never live off of so little. How could I survive? ::hair flip::’ OP doesn’t come off that way, but others do. I agree on the useless crap part. For instance, $100 on insanity dvds. Didn’t the OP say she had an expensive gym membership?
Post by Ashley&Scott on Sept 27, 2012 11:56:05 GMT -5
Glad to hear YH has taken over the PITI & paid off a car. That's a step in the right direction to making things more even.
$600 for gifts & $300 for donations, yikes! Are the gifts from you & Mr. Farmer? If so he should be contributing to these too IMO.
Yes random stuff at Target/Walmart adds up.
I get caught up buying stuff for M too. Some of it he needs, some he doesn't. I try to reign it in as needed. I consider if he really needs something. Do you have a monthly budget for N, I thought you did? Can you sell anything he's no longer using?
Of all of the things you listed above the only stuff I would consider "fun" money would be the coffee & sushi. Can you make coffee at home or at work? It would be cheaper than buying at the cafe.
This is not a case of a person who has to scrimp and save to survive.
This is a case of a person who makes a good living but buys a lot of useless shit and has a partner who also makes a good living but is a dick.
No need to wah wah wah about about completely different circumstances.
No, but there are others who come off as very ‘OMFG, I could never live off of so little. How could I survive? ::hair flip::’ OP doesn’t come off that way, but others do. I agree on the useless crap part. For instance, $100 on insanity dvds. Didn’t the OP say she had an expensive gym membership?
I'm probably the one that came off that way. But it's true, that if I were in Farmer's financial shoes, I'd be pissed that getting coffee every day is factored into my fun money budget. Actually, I'd be pissed about $25/wk of fun money based on her HHI.
I'm guessing we make considerably less than Farmer, but if my husband was nickel and diming me to the extent hers seems to be, I'd be calling BS. And that's with a considerably lower HHI.
I have a problem buying lots of crap as well. One thing that has helped me is to put it down the first time I pick it up (or close the browser) and come back to it the next time I'm at that store. Usually I don't even still want it.
No, but there are others who come off as very ‘OMFG, I could never live off of so little. How could I survive? ::hair flip::’ OP doesn’t come off that way, but others do. I agree on the useless crap part. For instance, $100 on insanity dvds. Didn’t the OP say she had an expensive gym membership?
I'm probably the one that came off that way. But it's true, that if I were in Farmer's financial shoes, I'd be pissed that getting coffee every day is factored into my fun money budget. Actually, I'd be pissed about $25/wk of fun money based on her HHI.
I'm guessing we make considerably less than Farmer, but if my husband was nickel and diming me to the extent hers seems to be, I'd be calling BS. And that's with a considerably lower HHI.
The bolded is true. At that income, you’d expect to have more spending money. From some of farmer’s other posts, it seems like they’re trying to get things under control. So they’re going at it really tight. Maybe it’s a bit excessive, maybe not. We obviously don’t know their exact situation.
I don't get all the hate for farmer's H. Maybe I am missing some background here. Why don't you guys pool your money based on income for family expenses, like stuff for the house and kid?
I'm probably the one that came off that way. But it's true, that if I were in Farmer's financial shoes, I'd be pissed that getting coffee every day is factored into my fun money budget. Actually, I'd be pissed about $25/wk of fun money based on her HHI.
I'm guessing we make considerably less than Farmer, but if my husband was nickel and diming me to the extent hers seems to be, I'd be calling BS. And that's with a considerably lower HHI.
The bolded is true. At that income, you’d expect to have more spending money. From some of farmer’s other posts, it seems like they’re trying to get things under control. So they’re going at it really tight. Maybe it’s a bit excessive, maybe not. We obviously don’t know their exact situation.
The bolded is true. At that income, you’d expect to have more spending money. From some of farmer’s other posts, it seems like they’re trying to get things under control. So they’re going at it really tight. Maybe it’s a bit excessive, maybe not. We obviously don’t know their exact situation.
You keep saying "they."
The problem is that MR. FARMER SUCKS.
Do you get it now?
That, and Mrs. Farmer spends on things she doesn't need to. But hey, it's not my money.
I don't get all the hate for farmer's H. Maybe I am missing some background here. Why don't you guys pool your money based on income for family expenses, like stuff for the house and kid?
You're definitely missing some background.
Many of the more flippant responses are from people who've known farmer for years, IRL & online. This is not across the board advice for generic couples on a tight budget.