Okay, if a person says "Sometimes I like to drink because it just makes me feel better" ... would you guess this person has a problem? Or is occasional use of alcohol like this normal to you, like a comfort food type thing?
What are your red flags for normal vs. problematic alcohol consumption behavior?
Alcohol pretty much always makes me feel better. I don't think I have a drinking problem. I don't *have* to drink, nor do I downplay or hide my drinking.
Yeah, I need more context too. I've seen plenty of FB posts about people wanting a drink after a long, hard day. I don't consider them to have a problem with alcohol.
I drink sometimes to just "feel better" about my day. And I certainly don't have a drinking problem. For me, problematic consumption comes when someone needs alcohol to function or if they're sneaking vodka into their water bottles at 8 a.m.
I currently use both food and alcohol for comfort. I am more worried about the food, lol.
in all seriousness, I think it becomes problematic when your drinking negatively impacts either: 1) your relationships 2) your career 3) your health (in a tangible way - and something more long term than a hangover)
Yes, basically this, only it happens like 3x per week consistently.
ETA - and she drinks alone.
a couple of glasses per wine three days a week is completely normal to me
Right, the quantity doesn't alarm me, more like her choice of words in describing why she does it. I feel like she was possibly trying to tell me something, but I don't want to read too much into it.
Alone at a bar on the regular? MIGHT raise an eyebrow there; depends on the situation. Again, context.
A friend of mine used to stop at a bar on her own on her way home from work every night when she moved to a new town, because she was lonely and wanted to be around people. After a while someone at the bar tried to do an intervention on her for her drinking problem.
I just had a drink alone to improve my mood. Well, technically, DH is at home, but I don't even know if he knew I had one. I had a stressful day, and I was curled up with a trashy mystery novel eating a square of sea salt caramel and drinking a cup of coffee with a shot of Frangelico in it.
I definitely feel like I have "unwound" from my day, but I'm not worried about having a drinking problem.
I know there are many different types of alcoholics so none of us could really say from this alone. Still, when I think alcoholic I think of my uncle who drinks a twelve pack every single night. Without fail.
I know there are many different types of alcoholics so none of us could really say from this alone. Still, when I think alcoholic I think of my uncle who drinks a twelve pack every single night. Without fail.
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Right, I know this is obviously problematic behavior. I'm just concerned for her, because she admits she does it to feel better on a regular basis. Not like she does it for fun, or because she likes the taste, or because its social... she said she does it to feel better.
we had a grad school social a week or two ago (students only) and we had to come up with one highlight and one low point for our week.
I legitimately could not think of a high point other than, "I drank an entire bottle of wine on Saturday." in my defense, it wasn't JUST the wine. that was the first time I got to talk to my SO, listen to music, and just hang out and not think about school. but the wine helped.
anyways, I agree with insom and v - if for no other reason than to protect my own interests, lol.
I'll be the dissenter and say that it depends on the person and the conversation. I think jumping to "you're an alcoholic!" based just on what you told us would be silly. But if the conversation you had was addressed as though she was being serious and confiding in you - or if she someone who this behavior is out of the ordinary for - or if she's showing other signs of depression or struggling to keep up with life - then maybe there is cause for concern.
I guess I'd say most people probably "drink to feel better" so that alone is meaningless.