So out of the blue, I cried tonight

[BlueBayou]

I am so sorry Shoes. Those up and down days are so hard. Maybe this is just a way for him to show you he is still with you.

[jojoandleo]

I am so sorry. It's completely normal and you are allowed to be emotional. Big Hugs!

[udscoobychick]

*hugs*

[doriswe]

((hugs)) It's completely normal! Allow yourself to feel sad/mad/whatever...it's part of the process!

[turtle1120]

I'm really sorry, but don't beat yourself up over being emotional. It's ok, and just because you had one emotional episode doesn't mean that you're not doing well. Hugs to you!

[marigoldgirl]

I'm sorry. Sometimes a good cry is a good thing.

[blackkitty]

I'm sorry, was it just the one year anniversary? I can't imgaine losing a spouse, that must be incredibly difficult. It's okay to cry! It's okay to cry in front of your boyfriend too. You are human. It's a sad thing to go through, embrace your emotions don't fight them.

[Bernadine]

I'm sorrry. You're definitely feeling normal emotions, and it's ok to cry.

[usedtobebear]

I'm so sorry!! I imagine that will continue to happen at random times throughout your life, ((HUGS))

[usedtobebear]

Oct 16, 2012 12:03:32 GMT -5 FormerlyRR said:

Stuff keeps sneaking up on me. I feel silly crying over a pair of flutes. And I don't know what to do with them or the bag of cards and letters. And the pictures I have on my phone, and the voice mails I can't bring myself to delete. Everytime I get the sads, I remember that he loved me, but not enough to take care of himself and live. He wanted to spend the rest of his life with me, but I didn't know it would only be a five year marriage. He got his wish.
And fuck, now I'm crying again.

I'm so sorry!! Do you mind sharing if he died from a sickness of some sort that he didn't take care of or he chose to no longer live? I'm confused by your statement 'he got his wish.' You don't have to answer if it makes you uncomfortable! ((HUGS))

[doriswe]

((lshoes))

[heavenly]

((Hugs))

[achase123]

Big hugs to you ({) (})

[usedtobebear]

Oct 16, 2012 13:45:03 GMT -5 FormerlyRR said:

Oct 16, 2012 12:07:28 GMT -5 usedtobebear said:

I'm so sorry!! Do you mind sharing if he died from a sickness of some sort that he didn't take care of or he chose to no longer live? I'm confused by your statement 'he got his wish.' You don't have to answer if it makes you uncomfortable! ((HUGS))

He was an alcoholic. He had a stroke. He was told multiple times by various doctors to quit drinking or he'd die, and he didn't quit. And as far as "getting his wish," he did spend the rest of his life with me. It was just a very short time.
And I didn't know he was an alcoholic when I married him, I really only found out when we bought a damn bar.

I'm so sorry, I can only imagine how frustrating that must have been, and then to lose him forever. I think it's perfectly fine to feel emotional about everything, you are probably still grieving your loss, ((HUGS)) again!