Obligatory Baby Shower Vent

[Deleted]

I dont understand how the amount of people coming is tied into the $25.00.

[Deleted]

Wow. I would probably pass and take the mom to be out to lunch on my own.

Parties with rules for attending are annoying.

[ECB]

I think they may find that even fewer people come after being told they have to help cover the cost of the room (WTF? THey could cover it before but can't now?)

ANyhow, do you know anyone who knows the hostesses and you can get their contact info? Clearly people are getting in touch w/ them somehow.

[pugz]

eww no I would not go. I can't believe they are trying to pass the cost of the room rental on to the guests! Host it at a house FFS people

[mbcdefg]

Oct 16, 2012 9:13:03 GMT -5 @susan3589 said:

I dont understand how the amount of people coming is tied into the $25.00.

They probably had to guarantee a minimum number of guests/payment.

Whatever the reason, though, that's rude as fuck and I probably wouldn't attend just on principle alone.

[dexteroni]

Oct 16, 2012 9:13:15 GMT -5 @mrschicken said:

Parties with rules for attending are annoying.

This was one of my main points the other day when someone asked about hosting a shower. Don't place conditions on attendance. I'm not even really crazy about the "bring a book with your gift" thing but I do it anyway when asked. I'm not gonna deny a baby a book just because their mom's shower host is dumb.

OP, ask your friend how to get in touch with the hostess. If she brings up the $25 while you're talking to them - "You want each guest to pay $25 just to attend? In addition to a gift and a book? Sorry, no. I'd like to come, but if that's a condition of attending then I'll have to decline."

If she doesn't bring it up, then I would just attend and ignore the matter of the $25. If the hostess asks for the money at the shower - "Oh, I saw that message but wasn't sure what it was about. It sounded like you were asking guests to pay $25 to attend, but I didn't think that could be the case because it's such bad etiquette. But you really are asking that. Huh. Sorry, no can do."

ETA: I just saw that it's a surprise shower. Then yeah, asking her DH is the way to go.

[chessie]

Just wow. Host should be paying for everything else should not be your concern. I just send a card, gift and the book..

[mbcdefg]

If you want to attend, I wouldn't bring $25 and would just play dumb if you're asked for it.

[flygirl22]

Um.... wow. I would be so embarressed if I found out my "surprise" shower required paid admission.

I don't mind electronic invites, but the contact info is weird, my guess is they don't know.

[dexteroni]

Oct 16, 2012 9:49:44 GMT -5 @246baje said:

Yeah I think the mom-to-be would be mortified but I don't think anyone will say anything.

They'll tell her afterward. My work bridal shower host made everyone pay $15 for their (and I guess my) meal and I had no idea until people started telling me afterward what a nightmare she was. I was mortified. But oh well, not my doing, and no one held it against me.

[Deleted]

That is ridiculous, but it also makes me feel really bad for the mom-to-be and I hope that her shower isn't ruined by something that is out of her control.

[anna7602]

If there's no way to contact the hostess, how are you supposed to RSVP either way?

[definitelyO]

wow - maybe the hostess doesn't do this much? and has no idea of etiquette, etc...

while I LOVE what dexteroni said there is no way I would be able to say that/pull that off. My BFF however could do it in an instant.

I agree with OP - go to support your friend and just give the hostess the side-eye.

[dexteroni]

Oh and OP I agree with you about attending anyway to support a friend despite the weird conditions. It's not her fault her shower host sucks.

[dexteroni]

Oct 16, 2012 10:01:12 GMT -5 definitelyO said:

while I LOVE what dexteroni said there is no way I would be able to say that/pull that off. My BFF however could do it in an instant. .

It's not always a plus that I can. lol.

[Deleted]

What happens if you reply to the evite? Is there a link to click on where you can leave comments? We did an evite for a friend's shower this summer and they could respond/ask questions through the site. I can't imagine any sort of online invite system that has no "reply to" option. That's just weird.