Can't Stop crying...

[darkling_glory]

Well, last night after crying for about an hour, hubby and I decided that we are not the best place for Ruby. I do not have it in me emotionally/mentally whatever to take care of another allergy dog. I just cannot do it. I love Dozer so much, but if I knew now how much time and money and energy I would spend on him and you told me that three years ago, I don't know that I would have still adopted him.

And I just can't, in good conscious, take Ruby in. I'll start to resent her and her issues -- and that's not healthy for me and her. I feel like the world's biggest asshole. I feel like I've become something that I'm not - I am a good pet owner and a responsible pet owner and I feel like shit.

We're probably going to have to drive all the way back to bring her back this weekend. Hubby supports my decision, our decision, but I know he's not super happy with how things played out. I feel a little bit misled about the whole thing, but I don't know if that's just me trying to justify not keeping her.

She's such a sweetheart, she just can't be for us.

Sorry you guys. I am an absolute mess right now. Between my back, the fact that my hormones are COMPLETELY fucked up, and then thing with Ruby, I just can't stop crying.

I need to suck it up! I've got a class to teach! I'll be back around this afternoon. Flame away!

[lizo11]

**hugs** I am so sorry sweetie! I personally feel like you are making the responsible decision for her, and that you are being a good pet owner, because in the end, it will probably be best for her. And if people want to flame you, they are welcome to flame me as well. I don't think keeping a pet that you can't handle (and were misled about) is good for you or said pet. I am she will find a wonderful home, that is more equipped to deal with her.

Good luck! I hope the day gets better, though I am sure it will be a tough one for you. **hugs**

[Deleted]

Awww, I'm sorry! What a horrible decision to have to make. I'm not telling you what you should it shouldn't do, but I'm just wondering if you've given it enough of a chance? I only have cats so the adjustment with dogs is probably different. Unjust wondering if you would feel the same way if you didn't have the back and hormone issues?

Ugh, the situation is just sucky all-around.

[OrangePixyStix]

I know how excited and anxious you were to welcome her into your home so I know you have given this a lot of thought and did not make the decision in haste. I am so sorry about the way things have turned out with Ruby and that her allergies were worse than they led you to believe, which was unfair and manipulative. I hope there are no issues when you go to take her back and that they are able to place her in a home that can give her the attention and focus she needs.

**hugs to you*** We are here if you need, feel free to vent anytime. This is a hard situation and noboday can fault you for acknowledging that it would be difficult to deal with two dogs with severe allergies.

[shorty20]

Oh no, I'm so sorry

That's such a hard choice to make. We know that you are a very responsible pet parent, so don't worry about that. It's a crappy situation all around.

[alabasterangel]

I'm so sorry it isn't working out.

[lizardesque]

I'm so sorry. I can imagine how hard that must be.

[louietunes]

I'm so sorry, honey. I wish the place you got her had been upfront and completely honest about the severity of her allergies so you wouldn't have to feel this way. I'm sure Ruby is going to find a great place to live soon. Just remember, it would be unfair to not give her the attention and help she needs. You're just giving her another opportunity to be healthy and happy.

*hugs*

[Deleted]

I'm so sorry. I'm very angry that they weren't honest and upset with you in the beginning. I'm sure this was a very difficult decision.

[kitten]

No flames. I'm sorry that you are having such a difficult time with everything. I hope that you start to feel better soon.

[pilife]

::resisting honest feedback::

[wineenthusiast]

I hope things work out for you. I do not have dogs with allergies so please forgive my ignorance here, but what exactly entails in taking care of a dog with allergies?

[darkling_glory]

Hi all!

Thanks for the kind words.

For those interested, allergy dogs are a tricky thing. Some are monitored with just an antihistamine a day and a bath. Some are more severe and need steroids, immune suppressants, or allergy injections.

For our current dog, we've done ALL of those things. He is a severe case and if left unattended he will chew and bite at his feet to the point they are bloody and he can't walk. He takes quite a few medications to keep him comfortable and he wears a cone every second he is unattended.

It takes a lot of time, money, and mental energy to watch over him. He is either coned so he's not harming himself, or I have to engage him in other ways - play, bones, snuggles so he does not fixate on his feet.

Having a second dog that fixates on their feet so severely is just out of my realm of dealing with. I was under the impression that her allergies were much more in control - and it could be that in her previous home which is 7 hours north of us, the allergens were less than what she's finding here. It could also be that there was a miss-communication in how severe her allergies are.

Either way, I feel like shit for not taking her on. I feel like a dog dumper and an all around terrible person.

Feel free to post your true thoughts. Trust me, they won't make me feel worse than I'm currently feeling.

[Deleted]

May 22, 2012 9:56:38 GMT -5 pilife said:

::resisting honest feedback::

I get where you are coming from...but if she cannot provide the attention and such that this dog needs, I have more respect for her to say "we are not the right family" than forcing it to work and potentially upsetting the dog more.

[pilife]

May 22, 2012 12:40:10 GMT -5 @otterama said:

May 22, 2012 9:56:38 GMT -5 pilife said:

::resisting honest feedback::

I get where you are coming from...but if she cannot provide the attention and such that this dog needs, I have more respect for her to say "we are not the right family" than forcing it to work and potentially upsetting the dog more.

How do you get where I'm coming from if I haven't said where I'm coming from.
You know what they say about assuming...

[Deleted]

May 22, 2012 13:12:36 GMT -5 pilife said:

May 22, 2012 12:40:10 GMT -5 @otterama said:

I get where you are coming from...but if she cannot provide the attention and such that this dog needs, I have more respect for her to say "we are not the right family" than forcing it to work and potentially upsetting the dog more.

How do you get where I'm coming from if I haven't said where I'm coming from.
You know what they say about assuming...

Yes, I am assuming, but you said you are resisting honest feedback...which I imagine is that you don't necessarily agree with her decision. Otherwise, why would you hold back? If I'm wrong, I apologize.

[pilife]

May 22, 2012 13:14:48 GMT -5 @otterama said:

May 22, 2012 13:12:36 GMT -5 pilife said:

How do you get where I'm coming from if I haven't said where I'm coming from.
You know what they say about assuming...

Yes, I am assuming, but you said you are resisting honest feedback...which I imagine is that you don't necessarily agree with her decision. Otherwise, why would you hold back? If I'm wrong, I apologize.

You are wrong.

[Deleted]

May 22, 2012 13:15:38 GMT -5 pilife said:

May 22, 2012 13:14:48 GMT -5 @otterama said:

Yes, I am assuming, but you said you are resisting honest feedback...which I imagine is that you don't necessarily agree with her decision. Otherwise, why would you hold back? If I'm wrong, I apologize.

You are wrong.

I apologize then. My mistake

[pilife]

May 22, 2012 13:21:43 GMT -5 @otterama said:

May 22, 2012 13:15:38 GMT -5 pilife said:

You are wrong.

I apologize then. My mistake

[ILikeSloths]

I'm sorry to hear this and that you're so upset. I'm sure you're making the right decision for you and her.

[Deleted]

May 22, 2012 13:22:55 GMT -5 pilife said:

and :drink:

[mayflowers22]

(Hugs) I'm so sorry.