*~~*Ranch dressing!!1!*~~*

[maucat]

www.undercoverwaitress.com/2012/06/ode-to-springs1-ranch-dressing-on-snl.html#axzz2BIF791nD

Just stumbled across this and had to share. I don't want to use her name, just in case.

[BettyBookWorm]

omg yes!!!

[BettyBookWorm]

springs1.livejournal.com/392.html#comments

[Mrs.Rad888]

I can't believe there are only 2 reader comments, and neither of them are hers. She is worse than Beetlejuice, you only have to say her name once and she's *****THERE!!!!!11eleven****

[Deleted]

Ahaha.

[Deleted]

*Turns the lights off. Stares in to the mirror.*

springs1 springs1 springs1

*Runs out of the post screaming*

[Chirp]

OMG Fein. You suck!

She has a google alert set up so she's alerted any time there's a new post with her name.

::ducks and hides *****BEHIND***** a couch::

[BettyBookWorm]

Bwhaha we should poke her with a stick. "No ranch for you!"

[motzie]

Nov 4, 2012 17:24:18 GMT -5 BettyBookWorm said:

springs1.livejournal.com/392.html#comments

Bitch be crazy.

[Deleted]

I'm super sad my summoning didn't work

[Chirp]

Nov 5, 2012 12:27:27 GMT -5 @feinicstine said:

I'm super sad my summoning didn't work

LOL. Her google alert must not be working. Or she's busy harrassing the waitresses at Chili's.

[zitiqueen]

Give it time, she'll be here.

[Kristinmo]

I thought about her the other night when I was at Chili's. The waitress didn't write our order down. She got it 100% right but I was still laughing thinking about that does not make it ok!!!!!!!

[BettyBookWorm]

Nov 8, 2012 10:15:51 GMT -5 Kristinmo said:

I thought about her the other night when I was at Chili's. The waitress didn't write our order down. She got it 100% right but I was still laughing thinking about that does not make it ok!!!!!!!

Hahaha! I was at Denny's the other morning and was having Steak and Eggs. I love ranch on my steak (yes I know it makes some recoil in horror). I asked the waitress for a side and she brought it. I laughed to myself because I could just picture Springs1 going into apoplexy over the fact that the waitress couldn't magically divine that I might want ranch for my steak. Gasp! I had to ask!

:::giggle snort:::

[springs1]

Nov 8, 2012 12:04:15 GMT -5 BettyBookWorm said:

Hahaha! I was at Denny's the other morning and was having Steak and Eggs. I love ranch on my steak (yes I know it makes some recoil in horror). I asked the waitress for a side and she brought it. I laughed to myself because I could just picture Springs1 going into apoplexy over the fact that the waitress couldn't magically divine that I might want ranch for my steak. Gasp! I had to ask!:::giggle snort:::

Gee, STUPID IDIOT, I **************ORDER********************** MY RANCH YOU STUPID IDIOT!! ARE YOU DUMB OR WHAT?

[springs1]

Nov 5, 2012 9:36:43 GMT -5 Chirp said:

She has a google alert set up so she's alerted any time there's a new post with her name.::

NO, I GOOGLE MYSELF YOU DUMBASS IDIOT!!

[springs1]

Nov 8, 2012 12:04:15 GMT -5 BettyBookWorm said:

Gasp! I had to ask!

"GASP" if you want refills without asking, *YOU* have to PRE-ORDER THEM IF YOU WANT EVERY FREAKING SERVER TO KNOW FOR CERTAIN YOU WANT THAT TYPE OF SERVICE, UNDERSTAND? Also, if you want a glass of water or water with lemon or ketchup if it's not on the table already, you have to *ASK* for it just as **I ALWAYS, ALWAYS, ALWAYS ******************ORDER**************** WHAT I WANT. I don't expect my server to be a mind reader like you all do.

[springs1]

Nov 5, 2012 12:25:39 GMT -5 motzie said:

Nov 4, 2012 17:24:18 GMT -5 BettyBookWorm said:

springs1.livejournal.com/392.html#comments

Bitch be crazy.

HOW may I ask, huh?

[justduckydancer]

Nov 10, 2012 21:51:47 GMT -5 springs1 said:

Nov 5, 2012 12:25:39 GMT -5 motzie said:

Bitch be crazy.

HOW may I ask, huh?

8-D

Oh God.

[BettyBookWorm]

Hahaha!! Omg yes!

[maucat]

See what you did, fein??

[Mrs.Rad888]

Nov 10, 2012 23:57:56 GMT -5 maucat said:

See what you did, fein??

Shun!


Wait, let me try that again:
~~~~~~~~~~*********!!!!!!!!SHUN!!!!!!!!*********~~~~~~~~~~~

[motzie]

Nov 10, 2012 21:51:47 GMT -5 springs1 said:

Nov 5, 2012 12:25:39 GMT -5 motzie said:

Bitch be crazy.

HOW may I ask, huh?

Let me count the ways...

[MixedBerryJam]

Wait, let me get my popcorn ... In the meantime, though, ingspray, you get that we're laughing at you, right? I'm really not clear on why you come here.

[Deleted]

LMAO I love this post.

[BettyBookWorm]

So the real question is this, Springs1: why not make some huge notecards. You can laminate them or just keep one in your purse. Then every time you go to a restaurant you can simply hand your waitperson your manifesto and that way they know that their Tip is held hostage unless your demands are met. Sounds like a charming solution to your continued issues with servers. Please don't be surprised if you only get a spoon to eat with though. Giving a head case anything sharp would be foolish if I were waiting on you.

Why not carry your own personal supply of ranch?

Explain to me what you think the appropriate wait time is from start to finish of a meal?

[maucat]

I want to know what she thinks of the video.

[Chirp]

Nov 10, 2012 21:41:55 GMT -5 springs1 said:

Nov 5, 2012 9:36:43 GMT -5 Chirp said:

She has a google alert set up so she's alerted any time there's a new post with her name.::

NO, I GOOGLE MYSELF YOU DUMBASS IDIOT!!

Have ****YOU******** considered setting *****UP***** google ALERTS??!!!?!?!! Only a dumbass idiot would waste SO ******MUCH***** time by MANUALLY SEARCHING FOR their own ******NAME***** ON A ****WEEKLY**** BASIS.!!! DUHHH


Edited: I had my response typed out in English, but I figured I should probably "speak" in her language when addressing her. So, I used the (extremely handy) Springs1 translator to convert it for me.

[malibu]

Psycho!

[Deleted]

Oh my god, I thought she was a myth.