Post by OrangePixyStix on May 24, 2012 8:47:53 GMT -5
Dear BMW Drivers,
I am not sure who convinced you that you own the road, but you do NOT. Please don't drive like a jerkface and cut me off at the last second with the mindset that I won't hit your expensive ass car, because you tempt me every time and you obviously don't know my driving record. I'm actually a very courteous driver when people use blinkers and respect the other drivers around them.
Signed, Annoyed Driver
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Dear American Idol Stylists,
Are you kidding me with the glittered catsuits? My eyes hurt after some of those ensembles, particularly Fantasia and Chaka Khan.
Not all BMW drivers are a-holes. In fact, I am a very considerate and defensive driver. I always let people out in front of me and I am very good at merging.
Post by MissusTexas on May 24, 2012 8:52:00 GMT -5
Dear residents of my city,
You act like you've never seen a building imploded. I don't think full media coverage starting a full day before it happened was necessary. Please quit blowing up my FB feed and quit perpetuating your small ass hicktown stereotype.
Dear D's friend that texts me, GO FUCK YOURSELF. Do not text me anymore, I do not want to talk to you and have not replied to any of your texts in more than 6 months. TAKE THE HINT.
Signed, A happily married woman who does not want to fuck you.
Dear D's friend that texts me, GO FUCK YOURSELF. Do not text me anymore, I do not want to talk to you and have not replied to any of your texts in more than 6 months. TAKE THE HINT.
Signed, A happily married woman who does not want to fuck you.
ZOMG, seriously?! His friend?! What a douchenozzle!
Dear D's friend that texts me, GO FUCK YOURSELF. Do not text me anymore, I do not want to talk to you and have not replied to any of your texts in more than 6 months. TAKE THE HINT.
Signed, A happily married woman who does not want to fuck you.
Post by sapphire bou on May 24, 2012 9:25:46 GMT -5
Dear BIL,
Please don't be such a dickhead this weekend. I know you're going through a rough time, but I really won't be able to put up with your bullshit if you don't calm the fuck down. I might flip my lid.
You act like you've never seen a building imploded. I don't think full media coverage starting a full day before it happened was necessary. Please quit blowing up my FB feed and quit perpetuating your small ass hicktown stereotype.
TYVM.
Moi
Hah. FB friend just posted an entire album dedicated to the implosion.
ZOMG, seriously?! His friend?! What a douchenozzle!
No joke. Douchecanoe to the MAX! I sent him a long rant he replied to something of the effect of "oh, I thought you were cool and we could have fun" This is why I don't own a gun.
A bunch of his friends are shitty friends, and although I knew this, he is just now figuring it out. I didn't tell him about this guy cause 1. he lived multiple hours away 2. D still kind of liked him (they weren't close or anything) 3. it hadn't escalated this far and 4. the texts were few and far in between
But now, he's back and I told him if he texted me again I'd tell D everything and then make some stuff up just to piss him off more then let him lose on him.
Yeah, the bossman is visiting your office. Yeah, that can be a stressful experience. Yeah, we all know you want to impress him. That does not mean you get to put your arrogant, OCD mental issues into hyper-drive and make the rest of us (particularly me) dance around like puppets to make you look good. You are being a dick. I'm sorry your reports aren't showing that your office is the most perfect example of how our company should be managed in the whole country. No, I will not skew/triple check/ignore the numbers for you.
Please stop emailing me. It's the day before a long weekend. I checked out on Tuesday.
Aggravatedly, Your helpful Regional Administrative Assistant
This can't be real. After what happened last time? Your family is crazycakes.
My aunt is apparently in heavy denial. She's visiting this weekend with the rest of my family and planned to bring her dog with her. The rest of us also have pets, but we have friends/neighbors/daycare watch them as opposed to bringing them to a hosts house.
My mom flat out told her that if she brings that dog it is to be locked in her room and only taken outside to go to the bathroom.
My goal is to not flip my shit.. but it will be a long weekend.
PT will not help if you a) fight it and b) do not do your stuff at home. STFU about it. You're a mornic idiot who did this to yourself. I am sorry if I am not being sympathetic, but you have been having a problem for six months, and are only just now doing something about it because you a) got into a car accident and b) because someone else is paying for it. I am sorry I am tired of hearing about it.
Post by eureka1017 on May 24, 2012 13:17:23 GMT -5
Dear dentist, please hurry the f.up. I am missing more work than needed and my email box is exploding. This was supposed to just take up my lunch break not cut into my time. This sucks