How has it been going back to work? Is it really hard?
I am re-opening my daycare after 6 weeks. It's not the norm here, everyone takes a year off work. So I have no experience, no friends to ask..because no one goes back to work that early here.
I have it easy, because my kids go to work with me, and my work is just the downstairs of my home. But I still have to be dressed and look decent, have my kids ready,etc. before 8 am.
I am not so much worried about things like pumping or missing my baby, because those aren't a factor for me. I am stressed about not sleeping all night, and having to look decent and be ready at the door, cheerfully greeting clients at 8 am. And working my butt off all day long and just burning out, being tired beyond belief.
Any advice on how to handle the busy schedule of work/parenting with a newborn during the no sleeping stage? I am worried about having a nervous breakdown just from lack of sleep and not a moment to even sit down all day.
Post by emoflamingo on Dec 5, 2012 10:32:49 GMT -5
It hasn't been too bad, but I know that he's with my SIL so it's not as bad as if he were at a center. I don't always look perfectly put together (today I finally did my hair for work for the first time in a few weeks, I usually throw it up in a high bun with a headband) and I am usually rushing to get everyone out the door. Monkey doesn't usually eat anything better than a poptart or a muffin in the mornings but he eats something.
I think the key is giving yourself a little leeway. If you have on some nice yoga pants, your hair is in a neat pony tail and your face and teeth are clean, I can't imagine your parents would be all aghast. Especially with a newborn. (And if they do, they're jerks.)
Oh, and your H may be working outside of the home, but you are working too so if baby gets up and wants to stay up after eating, you make him help so you can rest too.
I am just feeling a lot of pressure and judgement from everyone..especially family. I think they have given me the worst mother of the year award for going back to work because that is pretty much unheard of here. I don't really want to either, but I need to work to pay the bills.
Post by emoflamingo on Dec 5, 2012 12:37:22 GMT -5
Tell them to shove it. Seriously. Do what's best for your family and if that means working, then it means working. I am a much better parent when working than when not.
Butting in here! Peach. Don't feel bad. You have to do was best for you and anyone else unless they're going to start paying your bills can shut it.
I had a three month break from school, but I was back to farming in 1.5 weeks. I'm just not a in the house all day person and needed to do something for my sanity. I was strong, healthy and capable. It was what I needed to do. I don't regret it. You also have good help and will get to see LO which is in your favor. I could farm because MIL watched LO or the teen neighbor girl I love did, which made me feel good and I could check on her whenever I wanted.
Like Emo, I'm a better person because of it. Too much SAHM mom time is disasterous for both Rubes and I.
As for other advice, lower your standards. I had to. You get done and look like what you look like. No one really cares as much as we make it out in our heads sometimes. Also, if someone offers to help you during this time, take them up and don't be shy. It may not have been a dinner you'd have cooked and the laundry may not be perfect, but you'll all survive.
Post by bunnymendelbaum on Dec 5, 2012 14:58:00 GMT -5
Peach - I'm worried about you because your job is so physically demanding. Can get a part-time helper for a month or so if you start feeling overwelmed?
Franca was such a good sleeper that I ended up doing ~20hr/wk for side work on my 3 month maternity leave, but I didn't have another daughter to care for and the side work was not physically demanding.
DH is taking paternity leave so he will be around to help. The plan is he will get up at the crack of dawn and watch the kids so I can shower and get the daycare ready for the day. And then be around to help at the busy times of day.
I am sure it will be fine after a little while, I am just worried about the first couple of months, the newborn months. I will have my newborn, a 1 1/2 year old, and up to 6 other children ranging from 2-4. Eek. I love babies though its just that I know I will have a lot of times where both babies are crying and the phone is ringing and the big kids are hollering and I am running on no sleep.
And, crazy lady that I am, I promised an old family a spot back (the mom is taking her year off with her baby) so in June I will have another 11 month old. Then it will be REALLY crazy. Hopefully by then though I will be sleeping at night pretty well.
He can take up to 8 months. He will stay home as long as we can afford it. It's half his regular pay so we won't make the full 8 months but we are hoping to stretch as long as we can! Which means I have to fire my housecleaner and we will be eating ramen noodles, lol....but he is so excited and wants to help me.
He can take up to 8 months. He will stay home as long as we can afford it. It's half his regular pay so we won't make the full 8 months but we are hoping to stretch as long as we can! Which means I have to fire my housecleaner and we will be eating ramen noodles, lol....but he is so excited and wants to help me.
I know, it's cute. he wants to try making supper during the week, and says he will do lots of cleaning. He is all excited and keeps telling people he is going to be Mr. Mom. He is talking about signing DD up for some activities too...since she never gets to go out of the house. It's really sweet.