Potty Training Issue

[badgergrl]

My 2.5 year old has been urine potty trained for almost 6 months. She probably has had 2 accidents since we went from diapers to underwear. She does wear diapers to nap and bed- she is still in her crib.

She will not poop in the potty- at all. She did it once on accident and we made a huge deal out of it (like new toys big deal). If she has to go she tries to wait until nap or bedtime. Sometimes that mean she won't urinate for hours ( I think out a fear that releasing one will release the others). It is starting to get scary. The other night she fought going so bad she turned beet red.

I have no more ideas and am starting to think I should take her to the dr. We have tried keeping things really really soft with a lot of fruit and miralax, but even that isn't helping.

Anyone work through this and have any new ideas for me?

THANKS!

[raylongivens]

Honestly, the only thing that worked for us was bribery with candy. Dum dum lollipops were something she loved and rarely got, so that was our most effective bribe. Also, we let her get used to it by letting her poop on a potty chair in the living room, where she could watch a special show and read her books. Once she got used to it, transitioning to the big potty wasn't bad.

Good luck!!

[pacificrules]

I don't think it's worth the struggle. I'd revert back to diapers and tell her we could take them off to go on the potty when/if she wants to.

[SusanBAnthony]

I haven't dealt with this, so I am not speaking from experience.

I would be inclined to do one more big push (combo of miralax, skipping a nap diaper (just put a bunch of towels under the sheet and be prepared to wash the nap bedding) bribing the crap out of her, family pooping parties, etc. And then if that doesn't work, let her wear a diaper to poop once a day and try again in 3 months.

[6fsn]

At 2.5 I'd just go back to diapers and try again later.

[mollybrown]

Our situation was different, because DS would simply poop in his underpants whenever he felt the urge. We went with straight up bribery, and he was poop trained in a few days. We bought a huge Thomas toy that he really wanted and sat it on the back of the toilet. We kept reminding him that he could have it as soon as he pooped on the potty. He gave in and pooped on the potty. We told him he had to keep pooping on the potty if he wanted to keep it, and he never had another accident. Disclaimer: My son was 3.5, and we knew he understood what he was supposed to do.

In your situation, I would probably put her in diapers when I knew she had to go to avoid any bigger issues with holding poop. I'd also talk to her pediatrician. One of my friends is a pediatrician, and trained with a specialist who dealt with this issue all day long (sorry, can't remember the specialty). She said that in something like 80% of cases, the doctor would have a very serious talk with the child about why they needed to poop on the potty and not hold it, and that was enough to get them to go. Maybe having her doctor talk to her about it might help?

[statlerwaldorf]

We had the same problem. We had her pick out a toy and left it on a shelf where she could see it. I kept reminding her that she could have it when she pooped in the potty. We also had to cut out the nighttime pull up which was gross, but it only lasted a few days and a pack of underwear before she pooped in the potty. After that, she didn't have any accidents. We gave treats little treats for poops for a little while before stopping.

[DarcyLongfellow]

This is a really common problem. Pooping on the potty is really hard for a lot of kids.

My daughter took forEVER to poop train. She didn't hold it, though, she just pooped in her panties. Multiple times a day. For months.

Holding it is super common, though. Hopefully someone will chime in. It may also be worth talking to your child's doctor.

I'd do a TON of rewards -- and talk them up constantly. We did a sticker chart with one sticker for pee, five for poop. If she pooped in the potty, she also got to get a toy from the "toy basket" -- and she got M&M's. A TON of M&M's -- like, she got to munch on them the whole time she pooped. All those treats worked.

[badgergrl]

Thanks for all the thoughts!

We have tried the bribery thing- she always has a large toy she picked out sitting over her head in the bathroom. The one time she did poop she got that toy, to go to the store and pick another toy, plus 3 pieces of Halloween candy. So, I am not sure I can bribe her any more.

When I think she has to poop I let her watch videos on the ipad on the potty too, so its not like she is bored sitting on the potty.

I am thinking about putting her back in diapers, but I am not sure I should given that she is truly trained- she won't go in her pants. I can try the no diaper at nap at home- but that is really the only time she poops. We have had to give her an enema a couple times because of the withholding issue.

So I think I may try to call and make an appointment with the doctor. Maybe a talk from her would help.

She has always been a problem pooper. From about 12 mo-20 months she would only poop in the bathtub. It got so bad I had her wear a swim diaper in the tub because I was sick of bleaching and cleaning the tub every night.

Thanks for all the advice!!!!

[SusanBAnthony]

Honestly it sounds like maybe she needs to be on Miralax for awhile, so that she can't hold it, and gets on a regular schedule.

One when we went camping, DS was freaked out and held his poop in. Then he got super constipated. Then when he finally couldn't hold it, he was afraid to pee, bc he knew the poop would come out too, and that it would hurt. God it was awful. So don't do that, lol!

[agrippa]

I would just stop mentioning it completely. Tell her that she has to ask for a diaper to poop in (so that she isn't trying to hold it) and thag she must do it in the bathroom because that is where poop belongs. Then, just wait. DS was a major, major witholder. He didn't poop train until 3y8m because of fear. We had to reduce all pressure. No talking about it other than sending him to the bathroom with a pull up. Fiber gummies and lots of fruit. Eventually he was ready. At 2.5, she has lots and lots of time.

[livinitup]

My DD would wait for her overnight diaper/pull up to poop. At first, I tried to get her on the toilet but that backfired to constipation. So then I thought, 'your body, your poop, if you want to poop in a diaper, okay'. She had bowel control, just didn't want to poop in the potty or toilet. Then I left it totally alone and let her poop in her diaper and would even give her one when asked. Gave it ZERO negative energy. She did better on the potty than the toilet ring when she came around. And we used to do the poopy dance and sing when she pooped in the potty.

[mmmomof2]

The 3 Day potty training lady said once they have 3 BMs in a row on the portty you have them forever. We did a sticker chart and told her that after 5 stickers in row she'd get something really big (day at Disneyland with Daddy plus a toy she could pick out). But she was never scared. She wanted privacy though.