Leaving toys at grandparents' house?

[jessnpaul]

We celebrated Christmas with my IL's last night. DS got some toys including this turtle which is adorable: www.buybuybaby.com/product.asp?SKU=18158647&

So we're leaving and MIL says she wants to keep the turtle at her house. I told her we'd share the turtle and I'd bring it back with him when he was there (he'll be going to her house full-time come January instead of daycare). Should I have sucked it up and left the toy there? I feel like it would be good to have at home and I have no problem bringing it back and forth... but the toy was for him so shouldn't it go to the house he actually lives in?

FTR, this was not a huge deal or anything... but I felt bad that I didn't want to leave the toy with her considering she bought it for him.

[CloudBee]

Did you tell her you would share it and bring it back, or did you casually ask "mind if we take it for now and return it?

I think it's really annoying when I hear these stories of parents and ILs gifting items and then on the way out the door saying the toy is meant to stay at their house. Yet at the same time, it's probably not something I would fight at all. You likely never expected to have X toy, and based on your ticker, your kiddo isn't evne old enough right now to have any clue that he received it or that it would be missing from his own home.

I would have let it go, and maybe had a quick chat about how that's fine for now, but in the future it would be great to know in advance if toys are meant to stay at her house. Then you could explain to him once he's old enough to understand.

[6fsn]

It's annoying she handled it that way. I like Cloud's suggestion for the future, but for now just leave the turtle. You'll have enough to take back and forth why add one more thing?

Also, if she will be watching your child fulltime she should have some things there. Maybe make some plans to hit yardsales and consignment shops so she has stuff.

[jenjen]

DS got that turtle and loves it! I think it's kind of weird that she bought it and wants to keep it there. I agree with the other advice, it could become a problem as the kids get older and grandma wants to get them presents but they can only keep them at grandparent's house.

We offered to give some duplicates at the IL's house - we have 3 of the exact same block/bucket and 2 of the same stackable rings. We don't need these, so we offered to keep them at the IL's. They shouldn't gift things and not let you keep them.

[Deleted]

I probably would have cared when I had one baby & lived far from my ILs but now I hope the stuff my MIL gives them stays there. My MIL has an entire room full of toys, bunk beds, TV, etc dedicated to them. She doesnt seem to care what stays & what goes from her house. If my girls want to bring something home I let them (usually) but its rare they even ask. I love that all that crap isn't in my house, weve got enough. Since your ILs are watching him regularily soon, I'd have left it there without batting an eye. He'll have plenty of time to play with it later.

[mollybrown]

I'll be the dissenter. Since your child will be at her house full time starting next month, I actually don't think this is a big deal. The baby will need things to play with over there one way or another, so why not just leave the toys that she bought there? It will not be worth it to try to remember to bring a specific toy back and forward. You will have to go out and buy more toys for her house.

I would completely agree with you if the baby was only going to be visiting periodically.

[GailGoldie]

trust me- very soon you will WISH you could leave MORE of the presents your kids get at someone else's house!!!

we always leave some at my parent's house and my sister's house (since the boys are there fairly often visiting).... so we have a little more space at our house!

[MamaMaui24]

Dec 27, 2012 14:50:56 GMT -5 GailGoldie said:

trust me- very soon you will WISH you could leave MORE of the presents your kids get at someone else's house!!!

This! I wanted to leave some at my in laws but DH told me that was rude.

[jessnpaul]

Ha! Yeah, I'm sure at some point we'll be overwhelmed with toys but right now we don't have that much at our house (but that is ever-increasing!)

I said I would happily bring the toy back and forth with DS... and ultimately we'll probably just leave it there Monday through Friday and bring it home with us on weekends. We're trying to encourage him to crawl and this seems like the perfect toy to put just out of reach that he'll want to go to. We don't own anything else like it at this stage, so I kinda wanted it at our house.

[6fsn]

It's $20 new. Spend a few dollars and get another one or something similar. You aren't going to want to schlep it back and forth.

[hocus]

My inlaws have the kids 1-2 weekends per month. They have their own toys, umbrella stroller and two PNPs. It doesn't have to be this way but it is much much easier. I send the kids with a single bag with diapers, clothing and wipes and they have everything else.

[LauraMoser]

I hate when the grandparents do this! lol

I've had it happen on a few occasions, and I haven't argued otherwise, just left it there. But, I will admit that I am very disappointed when its a toy that I am excited about!

[statlerwaldorf]

Normally I would think it's a little weird, but since they will be watching him during the day, I would leave it there. I would try to leave as much stuff as I could instead of carrying it back and forth everyday.

[ilikedonuts]

My mom tells me upfront before she gives DD something that its meant to stay at her house. I also choose some things to leave at her house (like my mom got her a 2nd Disney Little People Castle). But I would have probably taken it with me too and then brought it back once she starts watching him.

[Deleted]

It was for your kid, not you. So if your kid will be playing a lot over there, too, I don't see the big deal.

[CloudBee]

I couldn't imagine packing that bulky toy and bringing it to her house M-F every week, then home for the weekends. Just buy another on Amazon.