Was I wrong?

[kimandross]

Ok, so here's the situation...my parents went away on a week's vacation.

Goodness, that just came out. i had to get out of my system, thanks for continuing to read. My MIL forgot to send my parents gift (they always exchange gifts), so she mailed it. When the package arrived, my parents last name was wrong. It pissed me off because I've been with Ross for over 10 years and she didn't even attempt to get it right. I sent a text indicating my parents correct last name and that the name she put was wrong. This happened last night. Today she forwards the text to Ross, saying she did not do it on purpose, blah blah blah. Ross asks what he should do about it, I tell him I'll handle it. I text her again saying she did not need to involve Ross, it had nothing to do with him, and that I was frustrated that after 10+ years she is still getting their last name wrong.

Was my initial text out of line? My MIL has a habit of butchering names/messing up pertinent details/making mistakes with Ross' work stuff and just laughing it off, like we should let her do what she wants. I'm tired of the sloppiness. Sorry this is long.

[jen812]

I don't blame you for being irritated. After 10+ years, you would think she would get it right. I probably would have said that it's offensive that she doesn't care enough to get their name correct. Maybe she needs a different perspective.

[aegis2005]

My maiden name isn't particularly common or an easy spell, but if my IL's were getting it wrong after many years I'd be irritated as well.

[moonstone523]

Yeah, I'd be pissed, but I'm not sure how I would have handled it. Maybe something like, "MIL, we got the gifts. That was very thoughtful. However, I noticed you spelled my parents last name wrong. It's XYZ. I know it's easy to make mistakes, but it means a lot to me if you can get it right moving forward."

This is coming from the person who got pissed at the insurance broker for calling me caroline.

[lauren9317]

No, not out of line, she should get it right! My grandma had a cousin who always misspelled my grandma's married name. And grandma would never correct her! So the cousin misspelled the name forever-- for all 50+ years that my grandparents were married! So I think it's right to say something. And she didn't need to text Ross instead of you, so I think your second text was fine too.

[alzi]

Random family members of H's STILL spell my first name wrong. It pisses me off. But I don't say anything.

I should but it is usually when they send a check and I don't want to discourage it;)

[tashaandsage]

It would definitely irritate me, because it's a total lack of caring about getting it right on her part. It also wasn't necessary for her to involve Ross since you texted her directly about it. I don't know for sure how I would've handled it myself though, because we have very different MILs and very different relationships with them. I think this is yet another issue on a long lists of annoyances with her, and you were right to speak up on this one. After all these years, she should take the effort to learn her daughter-in-law's maiden name.