I am the devil SM agian

[socloudy99]

As usual things can only go well with SD16 for so long. She gets UPSET about things that I don't even think twice about and always brings it up to my H once she is home. This isn't an complaint only explaining that I don't know their is a problem at the time.
SD12 and SD16 had on really short shorts when we picked them up on Friday. I said their shorts were too short and don't represent them as the person they are.
What did SD16 hear? I called her a slut, am disrespectful, and hate her. My H also doesn't care about her because he didn't defend her.
I swear I can't deal with her dramatic flips anymore. She is mentally and emotionally abusive and uses this as a form of control.
I also told her how much fun I had with her over the weekend and what a sweet young lady she has become. Jokes on me! I guess she doesn't remember that.
In the past this would have upset me but now I am just slightly pissed and will be over it soon. She has pulled these stunts too many times. Over it!

[housegeek]

16 year olds are going to act like 16 year olds.

What kind of person do short shorts represent, exactly?

[Deleted]

Yeah, uhm this has nothing to do with stepparenting and everything to do with 16 year olds being high maintence drama whores.

If her parents were in a traditional married 20 years kind of relationship, she'd be trying work them over the same way.

[socloudy99]

May 15, 2012 13:23:15 GMT -5 housegeek said:

16 year olds are going to act like 16 year olds.

What kind of person do short shorts represent, exactly?

A 16 or 12 year seen in short shorts can represent someone much older that 20 year old men flirt with and ask on dates.

[wendilea]

What hab said. Teenage girls are a pain in the ass. Blended family or intact, that's pretty normal behavior.

I have told B on many occasions that she needs to change before we go out, into something I can be see with in public. I get eye rolls, huffs, and she bitches to whoever she can get to listen to her. Luckily all of the adults in her life feel the same way about how she dresses, so she's not getting a pity party from anyone.

If the rules in your house are no short shorts, then that's the rule. Your DH needs to support that as well, and if she throws a fit about what you said, he needs to explain that in your home, those clothing choices are not acceptable and she needs to get over it.

[marissa]

Have you ever tried going clothing shopping for a kid her age? I am so happy I only have boys. I buy a lot for my nieces. The clothing for young girls is all short shorts, skirts, etc.

[daringmiss]

I am totally on your side.

My bonus girl is also 16 and more than a bit of a drama queen. She is a modest dresser (more tomboy punk than anything else) but we struggle to find reasonable clothing. We lower hems and sew our own when we are looking for something particular. She even makes fun of the other girls in school who dress like Lolitas (she refers to them as FauxLitas).

Just establish some objective rules about dressing: Shorts must have an inseam of 3". Skirts must be 16" from waist to hem (or hemlines may not fall more than 4 inches above the knee). Bra straps must be covered. Heels can be no taller than 3".

Once these rules are clearly understood (and agreed upon by both parents), there is no problem. She knows what you expect and can make them happen (give her a tape measure to keep in her purse).

[StormyDixon]

May 15, 2012 20:30:09 GMT -5 daringmiss said:

Just establish some objective rules about dressing: Once these rules are clearly understood (and agreed upon by both parents), there is no problem. She knows what you expect and can make them happen (give her a tape measure to keep in her purse)

as the mother of 4 girls, I have only one thing to say about this advice...good luck with that lol