How would you make living with someone easier.

[Deleted]

H and I had a long talk last night about the future of this farm. We are continuing with exchange students indefinitely (maybe at one point having two). Long term goal is to hire an actual herdsman.

There is nowhere to live within 20 miles of here that's a) not a crack house b) my basement.

I don't mind exchange students/hired help in my house at all and quite enjoy it but I am looking for ways to make it easier. Of course they're welcome to pretty much free reign in my house but things to make it easier would be nice.

Here's what we thought.

1) Take the dresser out of the guest room and put in a desk instead so they have a space to work, email, store paperwork and print so they stay out of my office.

2) get a washer/dryer in our mudroom which is in the basement and not too far from their room. Boys are messy with laundry and traipse their dirty barn clothes not so neatly up my steps to the laundry. I can do it without issue, they can't seem to. The hookups are literally right in the mudroom, sticking out of the wall, ready to go. I'm just waiting on a good W/D deal. Seems stupid to have two laundry rooms basically..but if you saw the laundry I do in a week..lol.

3) We're getting playroom/FR cabinets/bar area in the next month. We're going to add a wine fridge for drinks and snacks. This way at night they can grab treats and not be in and out of the kitchen constantly while we're trying to relax. 

Other things to note: 
Our guestroom for E. students is huge. If we have two..I can stick two double beds in there easy and they each can have half a huge walk in closet. It's in it's own separate wing of the basement, so semi-private anyways. I'm not willing to give up my other guestroom. We need it. For another kid down the line and weekend guests. They have pretty much their own bathroom (just share with weekend guests). So none of that jazz is an issue.

So what other things can you think of to add that you'd like if you were me or if you were living with someone else. I

[thewop]

Small tv and dvd player in their room?

[Deleted]

Feb 7, 2013 11:09:19 GMT -5 thewop said:

Small tv and dvd player in their room?

Ooh...that's an idea! There's actually one in the FR right off their room. Some kids have used it, some kids don't. We don't use it all, I could just pick it up and move it into their room. It'd also be out of Rubes' sightline that way. The antennae hookup is actually working and accessible in the E. student room. Most actually don't love TV TBH. The little they do seem to watch is NASCAR on Sunday with H and whatever they find on their laptops.

Thanks. I'll add it to the list.

[thewop]

Also, do you have a second vacuum they could use for their own room? Maybe encourage them to be a little more tidy if they have designated cleaning tools close at hand?

What about a small white board for reminders and updates? Or a cork board of their own?

[kitty]

I would try to make it as self contained as possible. Giving them their own TV is a great idea. I would think having a washer/dryer for farm stuff (and whoever lives in the basement) and one for regular stuff would be great. Can you fit both a desk and a dresser or maybe put the dresser in the walk in closet? I personally prefer to store small things like underwear in actual drawers even if the closet was cavernous.

[Deleted]

Feb 7, 2013 11:27:02 GMT -5 thewop said:

Also, do you have a second vacuum they could use for their own room? Maybe encourage them to be a little more tidy if they have designated cleaning tools close at hand?

What about a small white board for reminders and updates? Or a cork board of their own?

I like you more everyday! LOL.

I need to get a better vacuum in the basement. The one I have works fine, it's just a jiggle the handle, twist the cord sort of situation. I get it, no one else does.  These kids don't clean anyways. Part is too busy, part is cultural norms. We also discussed seeing if I could swing a cleaning lady even once a month.

Whiteboard is good. There's one in the barn for work reminders, but one for house stuff would be great. Which also made me think, I need to get an over the door mail holder/file thing. Otherwise their mail and paperwork lays on my counter or steps until I get mad and take it down. This way it'd have a home ASAP.

Thanks for talking me through this. We're getting a new kid by Tuesday (long story) I think, so I'm making a Target list as we speak. 

[sjh722]

I don't think two washer/dryers is silly at all - one of our friends is a dairy vet and one thing they loved about their old house with a separate w/d in the basement so his farm clothes went straight into the wash down there, rather than up into the main living area.

I agree with the other ideas pps have had too - dressers in the WIC are a good idea, and maybe a TV/DVD player in their room. If it's more self-contained when they arrive, perhaps they'll get the idea that it gives both of you more privacy that way?

[Deleted]

Feb 7, 2013 11:32:03 GMT -5 kitty said:

I would try to make it as self contained as possible. Giving them their own TV is a great idea. I would think having a washer/dryer for farm stuff (and whoever lives in the basement) and one for regular stuff would be great. Can you fit both a desk and a dresser or maybe put the dresser in the walk in closet? I personally prefer to store small things like underwear in actual drawers even if the closet was cavernous.

The dresser in there is crap. Like going in the fire as soon as H helps me carry it out crap. The closet is lined with those rubbermaid drawers on the bottom already..so plenty of space. These kids also come with like 4 pair of socks, 3 pants and 2 shirts. Not a ton of storage required. I do need to get one for the bathroom. They all seem to love "beauty" supplies..lol and it ends up everywhere.

Keep talking to me girls...

[simpsongal]

Do you have wifi? I would also just try to make the space very liveable -- lots of hooks for hanging clothes and stuff, a corkboard for pictures, baskets for "stuff." Plenty of lighting in the room, alarm clock. I think the space for their food stuff will be nice - will there be a cabinet or something just for them too?

Do you have a hairdryer and other "hotel" like amenities they may not have brought? Would a robe be silly? Extra pillows & blankets too. Maybe a tray for carry food or leaning on in bed.

I know those "arm" pillows look dated but I love a big firm pillow.  When I was in college I did so much stuff in bed (e.g., reading, crafts, phone chatting, eating) and it was nice to have a comfy place to sit up.

[Deleted]

Feb 7, 2013 11:37:17 GMT -5 sjh722 said:

I don't think two washer/dryers is silly at all - one of our friends is a dairy vet and one thing they loved about their old house with a separate w/d in the basement so his farm clothes went straight into the wash down there, rather than up into the main living area.

I agree with the other ideas pps have had too - dressers in the WIC are a good idea, and maybe a TV/DVD player in their room. If it's more self-contained when they arrive, perhaps they'll get the idea that it gives both of you more privacy that way?

This is what I'm hoping for. Set up on the right foot from the start. Trying to change in the middle is completely worthless and not worth the effort. H and I are having a date day (Applebees! Tax Accountant! Target! YAY!) so we'll get some of this knocked off the list.

And it's not like I don't want them in the rest of my house. I'm pretty open. More I think we'd all be happier with our own "relax" space where we can be comfortable. And a place for their crap! I'm realizing I'm anti-clutter by nature. Most people aren't. It stresses me out and I could fix it in about four minutes.

[Deleted]

Feb 7, 2013 11:40:06 GMT -5 simpsongal said:

Do you have wifi? I would also just try to make the space very liveable -- lots of hooks for hanging clothes and stuff, a corkboard for pictures, baskets for "stuff." Plenty of lighting in the room, alarm clock. I think the space for their food stuff will be nice - will there be a cabinet or something just for them too?

Do you have a hairdryer and other "hotel" like amenities they may not have brought? Would a robe be silly? Extra pillows & blankets too. Maybe a tray for carry food or leaning on in bed.

Thanks! I got all that. Extra pillows, blankets. There's a wall of hooks in that room. They have their own wall in the mudroom.

I try not to do too many frilly extras anymore.  Exchange students bring it all back to me and say, "What do I do with this?" They're taking up space in my room. I'll give it to them that way...they really are simple kids. The basics and functional.

[kitty]

If the room is huge, would there be room for a couple armchairs or a loveseat? I'm thinking dorm room style here.

[Deleted]

Oh yeah..we do have Wifi. Kids jump for joy when they find that out. Followed by a, "How much will come out of my paycheck so I can use it?" It's hilarious.

I can't get much more furniture in the room, esp. If I want to add another down the line as well. They are like .4 feet from a family room..so that's covered. I do need to rearrange it better once my cabinets get in though..it's kind of odd layout right now.

[mrs.jacinthe]

As regards the washer and dryer, can you get them from a used appliance place or craiglist? It seems like with exchange students and barn clothes, having a new set for their use is just silly.

Also, this seems crazy, but what about designating them their own "snack" set of dishes and pots/pans? When I visit with people, I a) hate digging through their cabinets to find what I need to "help myself" and b) feel really self-conscious about using their stuff in case something happens. I know both of these are silly ... but it might be easier, especially if you get more exchange students who don't want to eat what you cook and want to DIY.

[Deleted]

I may have missed it in all the responses, but what about some sort of laundry collector (hamper, bag, basket, or something) so that he can transport it easily/cleanly? Of course, I put a hamper in our intern's room last summer and he never used it once. Oh well!

[Deleted]

Feb 7, 2013 12:02:53 GMT -5 mrs.jacinthe said:

As regards the washer and dryer, can you get them from a used appliance place or craiglist? It seems like with exchange students and barn clothes, having a new set for their use is just silly.

Also, this seems crazy, but what about designating them their own "snack" set of dishes and pots/pans? When I visit with people, I a) hate digging through their cabinets to find what I need to "help myself" and b) feel really self-conscious about using their stuff in case something happens. I know both of these are silly ... but it might be easier, especially if you get more exchange students who don't want to eat what you cook and want to DIY.


Yeah, I'm just waiting for a good CLs deal, a family member to hand some down or a holiday deal on a new super simple set.

My pots and pans are well delagated anyways. My kitchen is organized that way. I don't want to get too carried away with the food stuff since they tend to leave it lay in their room (remember kranikan II and my apple story...icky!). Most of them can't cook TBH so it's more like "here's a section of freezer stuff. Here's how you preheat the oven." We actually don't take kids that don't eat meals with us (It's actually an option on the sign up list). I don't want the mess, the extra hassle and a buy a ton of groceries as it is. Good thinking though, I can probably organize a snack cupboard/freezer section at least better.
 

[SusanBAnthony]

I think having plenty of their own cupboard space (in the family room, kitchen for mail, and bathroom is what I was thinking) clearly marked with their name, would help. As in "your stuff goes in here. See how it has your name one it? Anything you keep in "your" bathroom cupboard I will leave alone. Anything you leave out on the counter, may be gone if I am cleaning.

That works very well with my 5 year old anyway