Have you seen the thread on TIP..

[smock]

I'm pretty sure imoan and habbsies don't dislike ML for being "too bitchy," so I'm not sure where that is coming from.

And if my spouse called my body weird and researched surgical "solutions," I'd be fucking pissed.

[Deleted]

What's the point of berating her about someone no longer available to change? Weird.

[emsumm]

I think that, knowing her H is deceased, it's probably better to respond gently.

[pursemeatballs]

Feb 17, 2013 14:55:19 GMT -5 emsumm said:

I think that, knowing her H is deceased, it's probably better to respond gently.

I agree. I found her follow-up comment to be really abrasive. She should have just dropped it after the poster corrected her. (Although, I agree that wanting her to change a physical attribute about herself was shallow.)

[furby]

This makes me sad. I'm sure we've all had arguments/disagreements/said stupid things to our SO/DH/FI that could be picked apart after the event on a forum. We don't know to what extent MBJ's DH mentioned this, or how serious he was being - she said herself that it was a 'running joke.'

To call someone's dead (And clearly much loved) husband a 'doucher' 'selfish' and 'shallow' IMO was really crossing a line. It was initially a lighthearted thread and it's not like MBJ started the post asking for advice about her DH's comments.

[missmaddie]

Um, wow.  

At least I know what to write in my next sympathy card.  I always struggle to find the right words.


"Hope you find a less selfish and shallow person next time."

[lola]

Yeah, I saw it there and was (obviously) disgusted, though not shocked.

I am even more disgusted that she's followed MBJ over to SO. Imoan's a bitch, has always been a bitch and I'm completely unsurprised that she felt the need to follow up even though MBJ pointed out her H was now dead.

[ralphlauren]

What dicks.

[mamasaurus]

Ah, TIP. The board that told me, "I hope your unborn child is a hellbeast."

[bcv513]

They always rubbed me the wrong way.

[lola]

It's in "I like you ladies (and gents)..." on SO. Some of Imoans' friends also come over and "clarify" for Imoan as well.

I have no idea what Imoan's deal is, but I love the fact that she went all sanctimonious on ML about treating people poorly but has no problem talking poorly about a dead man to the wife that loved/loves him. Classy.  I think she's pretty much just a bitch, and gets off on being a bitch.

[MWOS]

I wonder what it is like to walk around this world with everything so simple and clear. You said a bad thing, even once? You're bad. Case closed, end of discussion. She says anything she wants and that makes her "honest".

[wrathofkuus]

Okay, seriously. The guy didn't say a bad thing once. He said a bad thing, then tried to get her to have surgery so that her body would no longer abuse his eyesight. That's awful and you KNOW it.

[MWOS]

Speaking of eyesight, my eyes couldn't roll any harder at that.

We have no idea how he brought it up. Maybe he legit thought it was a medical problem. Maybe he thought it bothered her and after he mentioned this is when he learned that it didn't bother her. Maybe that's why it was funny to them for so long. You don't know. I don't know. She didn't say he hounded her for years to have it done. So without more detail, I just can't jump to the conclusion that her entire marriage was a sham and she should choose differently next time.

[wrathofkuus]

Mary, that's crap. Did you even read her post in TIP?

[lola]

Listen Kuus - The issue isn't that you or anybody else disagrees with his behavior. The issue is comments like, "Dead or alive, he's a douche. Better luck next time!"

For you to refuse to see how bitchy, mean, and unnecessary some of the follow up comments to MBJ's post were is mind-blowing to me.

[MWOS]

Yeah, I did. How long were they married? Did he mention it 3 times in 30 years? Did he mentioned it 12 times in 6 months? Do you get what I'm saying in that their ENTIRE marriage was not built around this one issue, from what she has written? And that telling her otherwise, without knowing the real details, is outrageous.

[margotmacomber]

Have we really gotten to the point where repeatedly berating a poster's DEAD DH is ok, because he was a douche on an issue? 

Is it OK to bash my dog when he inevitably dies because he was an ass hole that barks too loud and likes to pee on outdoor patio furniture?  I should know better for next time to get a girl dog?

Better luck next time finding someone better than your dead husband, who I don't care enough to find out if you are still grieving or not.  Fuck it though, my point is valid and your feelings don't mean dick to me as long as I make my point.

Fuck yea, gbcn.   (high5)

[wrathofkuus]

It said that he asked several times for her to change them because he hated them. Not once. Several times.

I am just flabbergasted that this guy continued to get laid by this very same woman. And I suspect that the reason imoan teacted as she did (though I'm not her mouthpiece; you can ask her on TIP if you'd like) is not only that, but the way MBJ brought up her widowhood. Didn't anyone else find that to be... I don't know, distasteful? Like she was surprised by the reaction to that misogyny and threw out his being dead as though he's on base and can 't be tagged a jerk now?

[lola]

Feb 17, 2013 19:42:09 GMT -5 wrathofkuus said:

It said that he asked several times for her to change them because he hated them. Not once. Several times.

I am just flabbergasted that this guy continued to get laid by this very same woman. And I suspect that the reason imoan teacted as she did (though I'm not her mouthpiece; you can ask her on TIP if you'd like) is not only that, but the way MBJ brought up her widowhood. Didn't anyone else find that to be... I don't know, distasteful? Like she was surprised by the reaction to that misogyny and threw out his being dead as though he's on base and can 't be tagged a jerk now?

I find you to be distasteful.

I used to think you were smart, if not a little over the top. Now I realize that you're just a fucking mouthpiece for feminism with no concern for the feelings of ACTUAL PEOPLE.

Way to go Kuus. Way. To. Go.

[MWOS]

I think we are making/arguing two different points. I, personally, don't think he was right to do that. It would become an issue in my marriage. But it is not the ENTIRETY of that poster's marriage. It was some portion of it, and judging the entire thing based on that issue is unfair.


And I thought that it was a little bit of dark humor, the way she mentioned her widowhood.

[Deleted]

I just don't like how cold she is...she just seems very cruel and cold to people. I wonder how she is IRL. I know it's cliche, but seeing someone be that cold makes me sad for them.

[wrathofkuus]

I am just really, really hating the widowhood sympathy play to end the conversation.

[nursewife]

That's pretty gross.

[Deleted]

Distasteful for her to bring up the fact that he is deceased? That makes no sense, kuus. Those responses are...special.

[Deleted]

I stopped paying any attention to Kuus and her rants on feminism a few years ago on the Nest after she posted some navel gazing nonsense. It was along the lines of "sigh, I get so tired of fighting the good feminist fight. Why is no one else as enlightened as I?" She was annoyed when no one knew wtf she was talking about, and went on to describe how she used to be a girl who pretended to be into sports to fit in with the guys, wore lots of makeup and slutty clothes, and could belch the alphabet while watching The Man Show, but then she realized the error of her ways and blah blah blah. It was basically a page ripped directly from the diary of an 8th grader.

I couldn't take her even a little bit seriously after that. I was already on the fence because I've worked with more than a few socially inept pedants like her during my years in the lab. Dime a dozen- but you can't convince them of that.

[Deleted]

i haven't read the tip post and so have no idea what anyone is talking about (i just came in to read whatever 05 wrote. i miss her).

and damnit if i don't want to run out TOMORROW and form a trivia team called "socially inept pedants" to wipe the floors with everyone else at the bar up the street.

[Deleted]

Feb 17, 2013 22:17:10 GMT -5 cville said:

i haven't read the tip post and so have no idea what anyone is talking about (i just came in to read whatever 05 wrote. i miss her).

and damnit if i don't want to run out TOMORROW and form a trivia team called "socially inept pedants" to wipe the floors with everyone else at the bar up the street.

Lol.  I didn't read the thread either.  You see how much that stopped me from weighing in.

[cleo29]

I don't know why porn has to be brought up each time the issue of a woman's body is brought up (I don't think i am saying that right).

Do you think you can't love someone yet look at them and sometimes wish you could tweak something about their physical appearance? Maybe you don't say it, but are the thoughts really never, ever there??

[Deleted]

Feb 17, 2013 22:31:20 GMT -5 cleo29 said:

I don't know why porn has to be brought up each time the issue of a woman's body is brought up (I don't think i am saying that right).

Do you think you can't love someone yet look at them and sometimes wish you could tweak something about their physical appearance? Maybe you don't say it, but are the thoughts really never, ever there??

I get what you're saying. It seems like every.single.time someone mentions an imperfection in their body, or how one wants to change her body to be more attractive to her partner, here comes someone dragging chains blaming "the porn body." It almost seems like they view that as the ideal and that why it keeps being brought up.

And FTR, I usually like Kuus and imoan. But this was too much. It hurts my heart for the OP. My H has said some really bonehead things, hell, he's hurt my feelings before. But if I lost him, then told a story about him and everyone was calling him an ass or a douche, it would really hurt my feelings. I get this is an internet message board, but there are real people behind these screens. I think we all forget that sometimes.