A registry WWYD?

[Deleted]

A girl I know fairly well is getting married. Registered 2 of the usual places. What she registered for however is honestly low quality, weird, odd junk TBH. There's not a thing on it I want to buy or feel comfortable throwing my money into.

This isn't a matter of NMS. If that was case, I'd just pick whatever they like and call it a day. Not my house after all.

So is this a matter of:

1) Buy whatever is on the registry because hey whatever, it's not about you.

2) Get something not on the registery but still along the lines of what she wants. (Which is common here. There's very little, "OMG, but it wasn't on the registry!" drama around here).

3) Send her a giftcard.

I'm just wondering what other nesties would do here. And let's not read anymore into this necessary. .

[peach]

I'd probably get her a nicer version of something she registered for. If she registered for a cheap plastic strainer, I might get a nice stainless steel colander. If she registered for some $20 hot pink sheets, I'd grab a $50 pair of really nice sheets. Or just give her a gift card and say screw it.

[Deleted]

Mar 2, 2013 12:41:29 GMT -5 peach said:

I'd probably get her a nicer version of something she registered for. If she registered for a cheap plastic strainer, I might get a nice stainless steel colander. If she registered for some $20 hot pink sheets, I'd grab a $50 pair of really nice sheets. Or just give her a gift card and say screw it.

Ha! Thanks. You also explained perfectly what my issue is here. I'm leaning more towards what you described. I haven't decided if I'm going to the shower or not yet. If I go I might get the better stuff. If I don't go I might send a nice card and a gift card.

[sailorgray]

My BFF's registry was crazy. For example, instead of registering for a set of everyday dinnerware, she registered for 2 plates, 2 mugs, 2 bowls because there would only be the two of them. Same with towels, silverware, etc. None of it was quality either, just random crap. She asked for my opinion and I suggested she register for at least one of those boxes of everyday dinnerware for 4 people. She said no b/c there were only 2 of them. She can be naive. I ended up going off the registry and getting her Corningware bakeware. I wasn't going to spend $100 on a hodge-podge of crap.

[boiler717]

I hate that. I agree, it's one thing when it's not your style but it's another when it's low quality, poorly made stuff. In that case, I'd probably gift cash for the wedding. For the shower is probably do a similar but upscale version of something and include a gift receipt.

[sjh722]

#2 with a gift receipt or #3

[hbomdiggity]

We are running into the same issue with DH's brother. They are young, don't make a ton of money, and just don't know any better.

Its like on one hand I want to get them something that will last, but on the other if they won't appreciate it I don't want to bother.

[whitemerlot]

Gift Card

[Deleted]

Mar 2, 2013 13:33:28 GMT -5 @callmefia said:

If you know her pretty well, why not ask her about her registry? Like, hey, why did you put these low thread count sheets on? Did you want this specific stuff or what?

Maybe she was worried that people would think she was greedy if she asked for higher quality/nicer stuff. If she did, maybe you can suggest she put some upgrades on there of things that are more important to her (if she really likes to cook, tell her to ask for a few really nice pans, and for lower dollar gifts she can put kitchen towels and some fancy wooden spoons. I love the OXO stuff). Maybe she needs a friend to speak up?

I'd love to, but I don't want to offend her. At the end of the day if she wants it, likes it, it matters to her whatever. I guess weddings are enough stress in themselves, I'm not about to go point out what's "wrong" with her registry. Everyone has their rhyme and reason. I don't have to agree or remotely like it. I can come on here and talk about it but I don't feel the need to start a bit of IRL drama over it either, kwim?

And I know her well. We went to college together. Hang out sometimes, keep in touch. But she's not a close personal friend where I could find a way to tactfully state it in a conversation. Me pointing it out would just be weird. She also sisters, SILS, cousins and closer friends that me who may have probably already said something.

[sierramist03]

Mar 2, 2013 12:41:29 GMT -5 peach said:

I'd probably get her a nicer version of something she registered for. If she registered for a cheap plastic strainer, I might get a nice stainless steel colander. If she registered for some $20 hot pink sheets, I'd grab a $50 pair of really nice sheets. Or just give her a gift card and say screw it.

This is what I have done in the past

[mollybrown]

I would do 1 or 3. If they don't have a lot of money, they may prefer to get 4 towels, 8 forks, and 6 glasses rather than one fancy pot. Maybe they'd rather get more cheap things than a few expensive things. If they aren't lacking money, maybe they just like cheap stuff

[vic1011]

Mar 2, 2013 14:09:06 GMT -5 sjh722 said:

#2 with a gift receipt or #3

Agree!

[TBM]

I would do #2.