Drinking and Driving

[frlcb]

I accidentally clicked on the military board and they had a 5 page post on drinking and driving, and I was kind of surprised at the strong feelings some people have about not even drinking after having one drink with a meal.

So, what says you? Would you be okay with drinking a drink or two and still driving? If not what is your limit? No drinks at all?

[americaninoz]

I'm fine with 1 drink. I won't have more than 1 + a meal, and driving a few hours later though if I'm going to drive home

[americaninoz]

and none if I'm driving dd......

[frlcb]

Jun 4, 2012 19:05:02 GMT -5 @publius said:

There is so much bad law being thrown around in there it's astounding.

Oh, I agree with this.

Jun 4, 2012 19:02:09 GMT -5 americaninoz said:

I'm fine with 1 drink. I won't have more than 1 + a meal, and driving a few hours later though if I'm going to drive home

and none if I'm driving dd......

I guess dh and I are really bad parents. We have no problem going out to dinner and having a beer with dinner, and driving home, with our kids in the car. DH never ever has more than one drink if he is driving. I would probably have two (although I wouldn't have two if my kids were with me, for multiple reasons, the main one being they don't give me the chance to )

Would you have more than one if you weren't driving but were with dd?

[frlcb]

I would be way more conscious of taking a cab now than I would have in my early 20s. I can, sadly, remember 1 or 2 mornings where I woke up and wondered how I got home safely. And I lived in DC where everyone took cabs! Luckily I did 99% of the time.

That is what I thought, like do people really judge their friends for having a drink or two over a nice meal that takes a couple of hours and then drives home? Really? I must have some lushy friends.

[allibally]

Well I don't drink. So if we are together and he had even one I will just drive home. Would he be fine, yes. But I just rather be safe then sorry at times.

[americaninoz]

yea I suppose on occasion I have drank 1 and drove with dd - many hours later & with after dinner. I guess we just don't go out often at night with her (like ever) so it's not really an issue. I don't think it makes you a bad parent to do that. Driving drunk - sure, but having 1 - nah.
When she was little we walked everywhere, so I often would go to my mothers group's 'champagne fridays' and then walk home - so driving was never really an issue

[americaninoz]

I think people on these boards can just be SO OTT about so many things. I really don't see the big deal as long as you are being responsible about it!

[frlcb]

Jun 4, 2012 19:32:30 GMT -5 americaninoz said:

When she was little we walked everywhere, so I often would go to my mothers group's 'champagne fridays' and then walk home - so driving was never really an issue

Our street has happy hours a couple times a month in someone's driveway, and everyone has a drink or two (or three). But no one is driving.

I almost never drink more than 2, because I get so sleepy and then still have to be up at the crack of dawn with my kids!

[americaninoz]

Jun 4, 2012 19:35:13 GMT -5 frlcb said:

Jun 4, 2012 19:32:30 GMT -5 americaninoz said:

When she was little we walked everywhere, so I often would go to my mothers group's 'champagne fridays' and then walk home - so driving was never really an issue

Our street has happy hours a couple times a month in someone's driveway, and everyone has a drink or two (or three). But no one is driving.

I almost never drink more than 2, because I get so sleepy and then still have to be up at the crack of dawn with my kids!

Ahhh I wish they did that here - that sounds fun!!! yea exactly lol!!! more than 2 and I just want to go to bed anyhow Ahhh the life of a parent huh?

[frlcb]

I know, gone are the days of staying up late, drinking and sleeping in! The happy hours are so fun, a couple neighbors have bounce houses so we put those up for the kids, and bring out all the bikes/trikes/cars and the kids play and the parents chat, and usually order pizza or something. But I live on an exceptionally awesome street

[americaninoz]

eh - they are so OTT on TB

[Deleted]

I drive much better drunk than I do sober. Proven fact. I have never been in an accident drunk but at least 6 that were my fault while sober. Only 3 are on record though because the other 3 I drove off without leaving a note.

[Deleted]

OK a serious answer now...I didn't read the thread but if it is the military board I can slightly understand. They could lose their military career if they are caught drinking and driving not just their driver's license. It is a court marshal offense in the army (I don't know about other branches). On base they will throw you in jail in a heartbeat so I kind of understand sort of maybe where they are coming from if they are military.

We MH was in the army, if you tried to get on his base after something like 11PM, the Military Police did a sobriety check on everyone who was driving on base.

[Deleted]

Jun 4, 2012 22:19:24 GMT -5 @heyyall said:

OK a serious answer now...I didn't read the thread but if it is the military board I can slightly understand. They could lose their military career if they are caught drinking and driving not just their driver's license. It is a court marshal offense in the army (I don't know about other branches). On base they will throw you in jail in a heartbeat so I kind of understand sort of maybe where they are coming from if they are military.

We MH was in the army, if you tried to get on his base after something like 11PM, the Military Police did a sobriety check on everyone who was driving on base.

This exactly. One drink is enough to end our careers. Anyone with a security clearance can lose it by drinking and driving (or even by drinking to the point of memory loss). We could lose rank and pay, and in extreme cases be tried by a military court-martial. One drink with dinner just isn't worth all of that.

[EllieArroway]

I am anal about this because my cousin was killed by a drunk driver when we were teens and it scarred me for life, but I do not drive at all if I've been drinking. When DH and I were dating it used to drive him crazy that I wouldn't drive or let him drive even if we had only had a couple of drinks with dinner, but I would much rather take a cab or just stay sober than worry about it.

eta - I just realized what board I posted on. sorry for butting in

[ninjatofu]

I think a lot if it depends on knowing your personal limit. DH will drive after two beer and be fine, kids and all. However, if he's drinking anything else, like liquor rather than beer, he wouldn't drive at all. I might drive after one, might, but I'm an astoundingly cheap drunk so I don't put myself in those situations.

Plus, I've been forced into sobriety against my will so I'm never in those positions anyway.

We've known people that have been killed by drunk drivers. It's awful, horrible and senseless at how preventable it was, but it doesn't cause us to turn into crazy pants Judgy McJudgersons. Only Bump membership can do that.

[popcorn]

I don't drive because my license expired at the moment. But if DH has a beer, maybe even two depending on how big it is and how long we're out I certainly have no qualms getting in the car with him with DD.

One drink -- as long as it's not hard alcohol really shouldn't be a problem.

However, I do know H's dad is a taxi driver in Madrid and they are not allowed to have any alcohol in their systems at all so he never has a drop of alcohol when he's going to drive after. His license could be revoked, so if it's the same for the military then I get where they're coming from.

[glitterfart]

I generally am a no drinks if I´m going to drive gal. If I go to a party and there is a glass of champagne and it´s the beginning of the evening and I know it will be 2-3 hours before I drive, then I might have half a glass. But it doesn´t take much to get me tipsy either. And you´re something like 8 times more likely to have an accident after a serving of alchohol, which is incentive enough for me not to risk anything.

[clogged]

My H will do 1 drink with food (2 if it's a long 4-5 hour meal) and drive. I am zero. But that has a lot to do with my size and weight, too. One beer puts me over the legal limit for like a week.

If you are DD- no alcohol, no exceptions. I hate hate HATE when the DD knocks back one, or two. Even with food. But then in my group the DD got their food/soda/admission/whatever paid for by the group so there were perks to being dead sober.

[bugabean]

I don't drive, but I'm pretty sure if I did, I'd be a no-drinks gal because I'm a "cheap date." I like drinking, but I do it rarely because it doesn't take much. (I haven't always done it rarely, btw, and I never built up a tolerance, so I give up on that idea.) I know most people an handle more than I can, and I wouldn't necessarily judge someone for driving after an amount of drinking they know isn't a problem for them.

[anna7602]

Jun 4, 2012 19:37:14 GMT -5 @publius said:

You might want to be careful admitting that. There are several posters on TB who might have migrated over here who think that drinking at all while caring for a child, even if the kid is asleep, is child abuse.

I don't really drive, so I wasn't going to participate in the general debate. But I do care for my child when I've had a drink or two. I am not sure how I would have survived the terrible twos without happy hour play dates, to be honest. I've also been part of TB debates on how "wrong" it is to drink in front of your child. It goes beyond whether you're too impaired to actually care for your child and gets down to this morality thing I've never understood. I honestly don't see a darned thing wrong with drinking a glass of wine in front of a child and letting him or her know that it's a pleasurable thing mommies and daddies enjoy, just like their coffee in the morning. (Of course, I guess there are some people who get their panties in a bunch about caffeine consumption, but it's a smaller part of the population than the alcohol-is-evil finger waggers.)

[Cheesecake]

I used to be in the absolutely not a drop when drivung group untul I was 25 or so. I now do 1 or 2 drunks max with a full meal (1 or 2 depends on how much time 'til driving). If my dad is around I still don't drink a drop, because he'll get behind the wheel drynk as fuck, so I need to be able to take over. Asshole!

I have fat fingers, please excuse typos!

[GilliC]

If I have one drink over a 2-3 hour period, I would probably consider driving home in the US. I would really rather not if I can help it though. I will admit that I have driven after having two drinks in two hours, but I am not proud of this and was not happy about doing it.

Back when my home state lowered the alcohol limit from .1 to .08, I had no problem with it, and I think they could stand to lower it a bit more.

However, I have definitely had the local policy and culture rub off on me. Norway has a 0 limit, so people absolutely do not drive if they've had anything to drink. They will even abstain from a single beer with dinner over the course of an entire evening, because the limit is extremely strict and the repercussions are quite severe. In fact, the highest number of DWI infractions are actually recorded around 7-8 am on Saturday and Sunday mornings, because people go back the next morning to pick up their cars and there is still residual alcohol in their blood.

While I think it sucks that they penalize someone who was responsible enough to not drive home, I do really like the culture that has grown out of the zero limit. There is no stigma about choosing not to drink, there's practically no pressure to be irresponsible, and non-alcoholic options are always available. I have a lot of friends in other places who are normally very responsible people, but they still drink more than they should before getting behind the wheel. It's astonishing.

[oneslybookworm]

DH and drive after 1-2, no problem. 1 is probably my limit. If I'm a Dd, then its a water and soda night for me.

I have no problem with having a drink joe two in front of my non-existent child. It's a glass of wine, not shooting up heroin, FFS.

[clogged]

Jun 5, 2012 4:52:59 GMT -5 oneslybookworm said:

I have no problem with having a drink joe two in front of my non-existent child. It's a glass of wine, not shooting up heroin, FFS.

So, heroin is ok as long as you don't do it in front of the kids? ^o)

bwa ha ha ha ha.

[Waffles]

We both would drive after 1-2 drinks (beer or wine) with a meal and be perfectly able to/within the limit BUT we take the issue the other way around and chose to drink more than that and never take the car when we go out.

It raises the budget to taxi it all the time but at least we can have a proper drink & stay safe...

As for parents drinking, I really don't get it: your life doesn't actually end when you have a child, does it? And surely, you need that drink even more than I do after a rough day :-)

[frlcb]

Jun 4, 2012 23:57:44 GMT -5 @villainv said:

Jun 4, 2012 22:19:24 GMT -5 @heyyall said:

OK a serious answer now...I didn't read the thread but if it is the military board I can slightly understand. They could lose their military career if they are caught drinking and driving not just their driver's license. It is a court marshal offense in the army (I don't know about other branches). On base they will throw you in jail in a heartbeat so I kind of understand sort of maybe where they are coming from if they are military.

We MH was in the army, if you tried to get on his base after something like 11PM, the Military Police did a sobriety check on everyone who was driving on base.

This exactly. One drink is enough to end our careers. Anyone with a security clearance can lose it by drinking and driving (or even by drinking to the point of memory loss). We could lose rank and pay, and in extreme cases be tried by a military court-martial. One drink with dinner just isn't worth all of that.

I get this point - but not one person in the post actually mentions this as a reason (and I don't know but I wonder how many are spouses and not in the Military themselves).

[oneslybookworm]

Jun 5, 2012 5:18:43 GMT -5 clogged said:

Jun 5, 2012 4:52:59 GMT -5 oneslybookworm said:

I have no problem with having a drink joe two in front of my non-existent child. It's a glass of wine, not shooting up heroin, FFS.

So, heroin is ok as long as you don't do it in front of the kids?

bwa ha ha ha ha.

Wait...you mean it's not ok? Dammit!

[crimsonandclover]

Jun 5, 2012 5:59:49 GMT -5 Waffles said:

We both would drive after 1-2 drinks (beer or wine) with a meal and be perfectly able to/within the limit BUT we take the issue the other way around and chose to drink more than that and never take the car when we go out.

It raises the budget to taxi it all the time but at least we can have a proper drink & stay safe...

As for parents drinking, I really don't get it: your life doesn't actually end when you have a child, does it? And surely, you need that drink even more than I do after a rough day :-)

:Y: x1000

No, I'm at least kind of joking.

If I'm going to be driving then I'll have half a glass with food a few hours before I'm going to leave. If DH and I go out together, then one of us won't drink if we're driving. Luckily the public transportation system in Germany is great, so back when I had friends who drank (now all my friends are boring parents of young children ;-)), I would just take the bus home.