Doubting Myself

[kelle017]

Today I feel like I'm going to be the worst mom ever.


I let the 11 month old that I watch get hurt today.  The gas fireplace was on, I forgot about it, got distracted cleaning up lunch, and he touched the glass and burned his hands.  

He cried for a hour before falling asleep.  He seemed 'okay' (and by that I mean he didn't cry) when he woke up.  He was looking at his hands a lot and recoiled when he tried to crawl, but he ate a bottle and was smiling at his sister. 

His dad was on the opposite side of the state somewhere 3+ hours a way, and I didn't have a number for him.  The mom was in meetings (I have no idea at which office) and didn't get my message until 5pm.  Looking back I should have looked up the number in the phone book and started calling the offices.  Maybe I should have just taken him to the ER.  

They are in the process of moving and things are all packed up and all over so I could only find the baby lotion and I put some of that on his hands

When she (the mom) did get the message she called the doctors after hours and had me talk to the nurse so I could tell her about the blisters since the mom wasn't home. 

When the mom did get home and saw them (one hand has blisters on the finger tips, the other on the palm) she started crying because she felt bad for him which of course made me cry because it was my fault for not watching him close enough.  I've posted before about how he is into everything at this stage. 

The mom knows how he is into everything and knows that I didn't do it on purpose, but it doesn't make me feel better.  

I cried when I got into the car to go home because I just feel like if I can't keep a kid safe from 8-5:30 how am I going to keep my own safe all the time. 

[themysteriouswife]

If that makes you a bad mom, your doing pretty damn good. Kids get hurt. Kids get into things. If I had a $1 for every time Allie, was hurt... Don't beat yourself up.

Is he ok?

[gogadgetgo]

You're going to be a great mom. Don't forget that. It sounds like he was ok in the end. Accidents happen. At least this is something you won't forget about next time

To share a moty story: I used the bathroom a few weeks ago and came out to Caleb holding two chefs knives, one in each hand, like it was the coolest thing he's ever done. He managed to get the drawer open and pulled them out. I had a heart attack but no blood was spilt. Good times.

[kelle017]

I just talked to the mom a few minutes ago. She took him to the ER and they were probably second degree burns, and they put some ointment/cream on them and they will probably pop in a few days.
They are going to a burn specialist in the morning just to be on the safe side since he is so young and they want to make sure there won't be any lasting damage.

So he should be okay though. 

I know kids get into stuff and get hurt, I just feel like this could have been something that could have been prevented.

And that fireplace is never going on again. I don't know if their new house (they are moving in a few weeks) has one, but if so that fireplace will never be on either.

[themysteriouswife]

How is the mom responding?

[bugandbibs]

How scary! Accidents do happen. It doesn't mean you are going to be a bad/neglectful mom.

Do you have access to his insurance card and doctor's office? I think I would have called the advice line when it happened, especially when you couldn't get ahold of his parents. Considering his hands had visible burns and blisters it warranted a call/visit to the doctor.

[kelle017]

I just texted the mom who said that he's hanging in there. The burn center was closed today so she is going to take the day off work tomorrow and take him then, which means she won't need me.
I'm sure I'm reading way to far into it, but then I get all freaked out thinking they don't trust me anymore, even though it makes sense she would want to be with him.

[kelle017]

Bugs- I didn't have access to the insurance info, but in the future I will make sure I do.

[gogadgetgo]

I'd also have the parents make a consent for treatment form so in the case of emergency and they can't be reached, you can give authorization to get emergency care done. If you google, you can find sample forms.

I've done this when my parents have watched C in the past.

[Kristinmo]

(((hugs)))

Accidents happen. I would not blame you for what happened if I was the mom. I alsmost let DD do the same thing a couple of weeks ago at my house. I caught her hand about 3 inches away from the fireplace and burned myself in the process.

If/ when something like this happens again call the doctor if you can't get ahold of the parents. I would much rather have you call when its questionable.

[statlerwaldorf]

When DD was around a year old, she climbed on the couch and was trying to reach over the arm rest and get something on the desk. I was across the room and saw her, but by the time I ran over to her, she had fallen face first hitting just under her eye on the way down. I had her checked out at the ER since it was so close to her eye, but luckily it was just low enough it didn't do any permanent damage.

When she was 2, she figured out how to open the childproof lock on the kitchen drawers and walked out with a butcher's knife.

At the gym daycare, she wasn't paying attention to what she was doing and fell hitting her forehead on the metal leg of a kid's chair. She has a little scar right between her eyebrows. She was the only kid in there at the time, so I don't think they weren't watching her.

[themysteriouswife]

Any updates?

[kelle017]

They went to the burn center yesterday. They popped the blisters and said with stretches it should be back to normal in a few weeks.

So I'm really happy to know that there won't be any lasting damage.

Obviously I still feel bad, but the mom keeps telling me to stop feeling guilty. She said the doctor even said that it happens (more often than I would think; I don't remember the exact amount of this type of accident) and to pass that along to me.

[kelle017]

And thanks ladies for making me feel a lot better by sharing stories about the things your kids have done.