Are there any other alanon meetings you could try attending? Sometimes the first thing you try (whether a support group or a therapist) just isn't a good match for you. Of course what's going on for M effects you emotionally and financially and is part of your business, so it's understandable to be annoyed if people are telling you that's not the case. But you can't fight this battle for her, so there is a reasonable point at which you just have to let go and let her do that even though it's hard. I'm glad your parents were supportive!
I have gone to 3 meeting. There is not much that is close that does not interfere with work. But i am gonna keep going. I like the one on SAT but i hate giving up a sat but will... its just in a church ( heebeejeebies) and its crowded and a older 60+ crowd. oddly both meeting pretty much said the same thing . We are controlling and f'd up and well that is true now but not before. And really i an not sure how i am controlling now everything i asked for has been falsely promised or not goven to me .. so i am trying to let go and let her battle it out but that makes me feel like i have to turn off and shut down completely. yes, i am so glad my mom and dad were awesome i just wish they could be here more. Thanks for your response Kershnic
Are there any other alanon meetings you could try attending? Sometimes the first thing you try (whether a support group or a therapist) just isn't a good match for you. Of course what's going on for M effects you emotionally and financially and is part of your business, so it's understandable to be annoyed if people are telling you that's not the case. But you can't fight this battle for her, so there is a reasonable point at which you just have to let go and let her do that even though it's hard. I'm glad your parents were supportive!
I have gone to 3 meeting. There is not much that is close that does not interfere with work. But i am gonna keep going. I like the one on SAT but i hate giving up a sat but will... its just in a church ( heebeejeebies) and its crowded and a older 60+ crowd. oddly both meeting pretty much said the same thing . We are controlling and f'd up and well that is true now but not before. And really i an not sure how i am controlling now everything i asked for has been falsely promised or not goven to me .. so i am trying to let go and let her battle it out but that makes me feel like i have to turn off and shut down completely. yes, i am so glad my mom and dad were awesome i just wish they could be here more. Thanks for your response Kershnic
Keep working at it, keep an open mind. You wont agree with everything they say, but I'm sure you'll find some grains of common experience. I'm sure you and M have a lot of trust to rebuild and that takes time.