If you've read Bringing up Bebe

[ijack]

I have a theory that babies sleep through the night on their own schedule. Some do within the first few weeks, some need more than a year. It doesn't really have to do with weight, but there isn't always something the parents can do to facilitate it.

[Deleted]

If a parenting book says something that you suspect to be bullshit...

it is. Especially anything about baby sleep.

[statlerwaldorf]

What is pausing?

[Deleted]

Jun 9, 2012 22:56:13 GMT -5 @tokenhoser said:

If a parenting book says something that you suspect to be bullshit...

it is. Especially anything about baby sleep.

lol, I totally agree with this statement.

[thedash]

I haven't read the book but I think I understand the pause idea. It sometimes worked for us when DS was really small (6-7 months maybe). When he got older it stopped working. I think he can now remember that we are in the other room and he's more stubborn. We're reading Ferber right now and it seems to be very effective for this age.

[froggy76]

What is "pausing"? Is it just not picking them up the second they make a peep? If so, I definitely think it can help with STTN. But, I agree there's no surefire way to get your LO to STTN and a lot of it depends on the baby.

I need to read this book. There's a French woman in my mom's group. When all the other toddler moms are bitching about their bratty kids and meltdowns at the store, she just can't relate. Her little boy is well-behaved and can entertain himself quietly. She said the key is that she makes him wait a lot and doesn't just drop what she's doing the second he wants something (like many American moms do.)

[anna7602]

I haven't read the book.

Based on the fact that my child's sleeping patterns, who regularly sleeps in until 9 or 10am on weekends and has to be woken up for school on weekdays (at 8am), elicit a lot of "ooo" and "you're so lucky" from French parents I know IRL, I don't think the French necessarily have all the answers.

Take that for what it's worth from someone living in Paris. I have specifically not read this book because I suspect I might want to throw it across the room. I get really peeved when people capitalize on generalizations or stereotypes in order to sell more books.

[atouchofklasse]

Haven't read the book but I fully believe in the power of pausing.

[fortmyersbride]

I haven't read the book. I also have kids that are crappy sleepers, even though I do tend to wait a second to make sure they're really awake.

I also don't think the age at which they STTN correlates well to their manners and temperament when awake. I have always taught DS to wait his turn, not interrupt, ask nicely and be patient- and he is very good at this things. But I don't consider it indulgent to go to him (or DD) when he cries out at night or allow him to come to our room. But we are cosleepers, do consider the bias.

[eliza22]

I didn't read the entire book but did make it through the sleep section. I absolutely believe that it is accurate. My kids are 7 & 5 and I just picked up the book because a friend had mentioned it and I was curious. Incidentally, I pretty much did the whole "pausing" thing with both of my children and they both slept through the night at around 3 months. (Not that we never had set backs or they were perfect sleepers but they did sleep for long stretches pretty early on.) I've never been a stop and drop everything type of mom and I think that is pretty much the core concept of this book, to (train) your kids to fit into your schedule, not vice versa. I think that is the big difference in French and American parenting.

[h]

Jun 9, 2012 22:11:29 GMT -5 ijack said:

I have a theory that babies sleep through the night on their own schedule. Some do within the first few weeks, some need more than a year. It doesn't really have to do with weight, but there isn't always something the parents can do to facilitate it.

This. Neither of my kids consistently STTN before a year. My second took considerably longer than that. Short of perhaps hard core CIO-style sleep training, I don't think anything would have changed that. We generally "paused" briefly before going to them after the first few months and while they would occassionally fuss for a minute and then go back to sleep, the vast majority of the time it turned into full-blown, "I'm being tortured in here, so help me you heartless bastards" screaming within the space of 60 seconds.

[bunch]

I read the book. I'm sold. I wish we'd done it younger. When dd was younger she'd fuss for a few mins at 4 a and if I left her she'd go back to sleep. Then one week she got sick and I got weak and now she's trained to wake up 4 on the dot to eat. If I try to ignore her there is screaming involved.