Taking kids to your drs appts.?

[cleo29]

Jun 3, 2013 21:18:54 GMT -5 @booby said:

i agree with tots. cleo and eb both gave good examples of when it's acceptable to bring junior along and when a kid is not disruptive or destructive, i think it toally a non issue with bringing them along. but my kid, for example, is crazy busy and curious right now, so i would be the perfect examle of an asshole if i brought him to one of my doc appts.

yeah, I don't take either with me to appointments now. C is too curious and K gets fussy and wants to move and it is just stressful. lol  Special appointments or if you know your kid and what they are capable of and the doctor is ok, then I don't see a problem.

[thinkofthesoldiers]

Jun 3, 2013 21:19:54 GMT -5 eb777888 said:

Jun 3, 2013 21:13:48 GMT -5 @jezebel said:

Is it really that hard to find a friend, family member, neighbor, babysitter off Craigslist to watch your kid for 1 hour?

Sometimes there's literally nobody I know that can watch him. I guess I could do care.com but why the hell would I do that when my doctor's office is fine with him being in the room? I STRAP him into a stroller and he's no trouble at all. It has never been an issue, ever.

We moved to a new area when I was pregnant with my second. We knew no one. No family within hundreds of miles, no friends. We eventually found a sitter, but I was pregnant when I got there. What should I have done with my older kid? I did my best to schedule appointments when the kid was in prek or H could stay home, but it didn't always work out. I am extremely strict and there was never an issue with the kid while we were there. If there had been, well, then we would have been kind of fucked.

[daisyheadmaizie]

Jun 3, 2013 21:13:48 GMT -5 @jezebel said:

I think a mobile kid is a terrible idea at any dr's office. They get in the way and distract both the doctor and patient.

Is it really that hard to find a friend, family member, neighbor, babysitter off Craigslist to watch your kid for 1 hour?

We don't have family close by. A lot of my friends work full time. I was going to the doctor at least once a week, sometimes more for 3 months and was not allowed to drive myself. It really wasn't reasonable to have a sitter for that. DD would read a book, draw a picture, or look at her I Spy books quietly the whole time. It was no big deal to have her there, and it saved me a world of added stress. She really loved hearing DS' heartbeat and my doctor was super sweet and always included her. H did take her for a walk when I had an internal when I first started having contractions. 

[sonrisa]

Snips, I know she's your friend, and yes, the tech could have been more tactful, but look at it from the other perspective. For those anatomy scan U/S they need to look for very specific markers that can be hard to catch in the blur. It is very important she doesn't miss any small differences. If she said that, she was probably having a hard time concentrating and doing her job. Singing toddlers have delightful but very distinct little voices. She probably wasn't lying just to annoy your friend.

[snipsnsnails]

No, I understand I'm getting a skewed story, but my bigger concern is that yeah, it's totally feasible to think that some families don't have any other option than to bring their children with them. My doctors even tout themselves as a practice that caters holistically to the entire family, not just the woman. Because when the woman is healthy, she is able to blah, blah, blah.

And 1 hour for a drs appt? Ha, you haven't been to my dr. office.

[Jermys]

God I love your kids, Frkls.

[snipsnsnails]

LOL, Frkls!

[Deleted]

Alright, point taken.

[Deleted]

Jun 3, 2013 22:01:22 GMT -5 HRH Queen Dick I, Orphan said:

Remember when @godawgs wanted to take her son to her bikini wax and everyone had a big fluffy cow about it? How is that different from giddyup in the stirrups? Lol

If we are talking about an internal ultrasound where a big wand is inserted into the vag, then this is way "worse" lol.

[KKD]

The only reason I've avoided bringing my kids to my appointments this time is that I was able to to schedule them while they were both in school, but they'll likely be with me for all of my remaining appoinments. I brought Emily to just about every appointment when I was pregnant with Kate. They came to my first appointment this time (and the nurse offered her college daughter to watch them in the waiting room for me just to make me more comfortable) and my last one, and my doctor specifically said he was happy to have them there.

The only times I arrange for a sitter (if the girls are not otherwise in school) is for the perinatal testing center ultrasounds since they do not allow children under 7, and for the dentist since Kate is still too needy for me to be so indisposed. 

[Gato]

My midwives' practice was so welcoming to my older daughter.  I only took her a couple times because it was usually pretty boring for her, but the nurses, techs, and midwives were all chatty with her.  It didn't seem like it was discouraged at all.

[Deleted]

Blah. Deleted because it was a dumb thing to say.

[snipsnsnails]

I don't care if they're cute or not cute or anywhere in between, it really bothers me that someone might be deterred from going to the dr b/c they can't swing childcare and their doctor presented them with a form telling them they have to or else 'No Care For You!'

[speckledfrog]

Jun 3, 2013 22:36:24 GMT -5 @damnation said:

Blah. Deleted because it was a dumb thing to say.

I clicked to respond but you had already changed it.  So, um, yeah.

[Gato]

Jun 3, 2013 21:34:45 GMT -5 snipsnsnails said:

No, I understand I'm getting a skewed story, but my bigger concern is that yeah, it's totally feasible to think that some families don't have any other option than to bring their children with them. My doctors even tout themselves as a practice that caters holistically to the entire family, not just the woman. Because when the woman is healthy, she is able to blah, blah, blah.

And 1 hour for a drs appt? Ha, you haven't been to my dr. office.

Yeah, my midwives make a point of reaching out to under-served communities in our area.  I imagine there were a lot of people there who already were taking time off unpaid from their jobs.  There also seemed to be quite a few teens.  I think they just try to be as accommodating as possible for people in many different kinds of situations.

I brought my parents to one of my later ultrasounds.  They were in town and I figured why not?  The tech was so great - she explained what we were looking at in each view.  My parents had never seen anything like that before; I think they were amazed by the detail, and just the whole experience in general.  I loved being able to share that with them.

[sonrisa]

Jun 3, 2013 22:41:36 GMT -5 snipsnsnails said:

I don't care if they're cute or not cute or anywhere in between, it really bothers me that someone might be deterred from going to the dr b/c they can't swing childcare and their doctor presented them with a form telling them they have to or else 'No Care For You!'

Fair enough. I hope there are practice in your area with different policies so women can choose those.

On the flip side, if your child actually does interfere with the medical purpose of your visit, it isn't really fair to blame the practitioner for that. You will get the best care that they can give under the circumstances.  That might not be the best care they can deliver when not distracted. 

[Jermys]

Jun 3, 2013 22:40:49 GMT -5 frkls said:

Jun 3, 2013 22:36:24 GMT -5 @damnation said:

Blah. Deleted because it was a dumb thing to say.

Now I want to know what it was.  I hate coming in late.

[snipsnsnails]

Point taken, sonrisa. I'm glad that the best care they can give is still care being given.

[speckledfrog]

Jun 3, 2013 22:47:59 GMT -5 Jermys said:

Jun 3, 2013 22:40:49 GMT -5 frkls said:

Now I want to know what it was.  I hate coming in late.

She just said that it doesn't matter what the doctors say, no one else thinks your kids are as cute as you do.

[sonrisa]

Jun 3, 2013 22:49:45 GMT -5 speckledfrog said:

Jun 3, 2013 22:47:59 GMT -5 Jermys said:

Now I want to know what it was.  I hate coming in late.

She just said that it doesn't matter what the doctors say, no one else thinks your kids are as cute as you do.

Of course no one else thinks my kid is as cute as I do. I get to be her biggest admirer. 

[nursewife]

My work has no policy, other than what your damn kids, and don't let them open doors because there may be a doc performing a pap behind that door!

[Jermys]

Yeah, I run on the principle that no one ever thinks my children are as cute or charming as I do. Mostly because I don't always find other people's kids cute and charming.

[sara76]

I'm bringing mine tomorrow to my belly check. It is a 5 minute appt, tops. "Any questions?". "Nope, all good". "OK, you and the cutest baby ever have a good day". I wouldn't bring her to a sonogram or any appt where I had to get undressed.

[auntie]

Yeah. It's a thing.

I delivered DS with a mega office with 10 ob/gyns. They didn't want kids in the exam rooms and maintained 7am- 9pm appointments to avoid it. They were OK with older kids who could be left in the waiting room, but especially didn't want kids in procedure or scan rooms around chemicals or equipment.

My younger niece had her first with a hospital clinic since she was uninsured. They were even more draconian and overt about it which was hard because many of the women using the clinic were young, poor and recent immigrants without family local to them. They held a strict rule about u/s attendance- allowing only 1 person with MTB during the scan.

[Deleted]

My office is ok with kids at appointments, but not at ultrasounds.

[somersault72]

Jun 3, 2013 21:10:56 GMT -5 snipsnsnails said:

She brought her kid to the ultrasound so that he could see the baby. It is a medical procedure, but also an important event in their family. He was well-behaved. He was sitting down and singing to himself. The mom jokes, "I bet you don't often get serenaded in your job." To which the tech said, "Actually, it is usually completely silent and this is making it practically impossible to do." What the heck?!? I think that's rude. And I know the kid - he is not a crazy kid at all!

Plus, I'm just ticked that doctors assume that finding alternative care for your child is a financial possibility for everyone. I just feel like any barrier to women caring for themselves with medical care is one too many.

Regarding the bolded, that was kind of shitty for her to say but it IS difficult for us to concentrate and make sure your baby's organs are normal when there's a lot of noise.  I'm a single mom, so I sympathize when people some people HAVE to bring their kids to appointments (and most of them are actually quite well behaved).  I actually get more annoyed at the obnoxious adults who come and have loud conversations when I'm trying to concentrate, though.

ETA: I don't need total silence, but at least pretend to pay attention if you insist on coming to the ultrasound.

[sparkythelawyer]

Jun 3, 2013 21:34:45 GMT -5 snipsnsnails said:

No, I understand I'm getting a skewed story, but my bigger concern is that yeah, it's totally feasible to think that some families don't have any other option than to bring their children with them. My doctors even tout themselves as a practice that caters holistically to the entire family, not just the woman. Because when the woman is healthy, she is able to blah, blah, blah.

And 1 hour for a drs appt? Ha, you haven't been to my dr. office.

I guess my thought is that if the parents really have nowhere else they can leave their children, than they need to find one of those holistic practice centers you mention.

For a regular check up? I would bring my theoretical future kids.  For something like an ultrasound, that requires a lot of concentration on the part of the technician?  I would not. 

[eddy]

This is one of the reasons I am so grateful that I work. They are at daycare already.

I can't imagine taking Jack at that age. He was a hellion.

We did bring Jack to an ultrasound with Leo. But H was with us and he was 4 and 1/2 so very capable of sitting and and being quiet.

Like vanilla said there shouldn't be a kid there if you can't actively parent, like when you are up in the stirrups.

[Deleted]

I can see the reasoning. The tech needs to pay attention to what they are doing and you are laying on a bed and can't watch the kid. It leaves a young kid to get into everything.

[thebuddhagouda]

Jun 3, 2013 23:22:20 GMT -5 Jermys said:

Yeah, I run on the principle that no one ever thinks my children are as cute or charming as I do. Mostly because I don't always find other people's kids cute and charming.

Me too, and I tend to err on the side of ridiculously sensitive to the noise he's making in public too. I'm constantly shushing him to the point where random strangers will say "Oh, it's okay. He's just being a kid" and I'm all "but but but we're in public".

My kid is generally the only kid I can tolerate being around for more than an hour. Other kids are annoying, so I just assume everyone else feels the same way about mine.