NCEP - DH attitude terrible?

[downtoearth]

Is your husband ever an ass?  I mean how would your husband react if he saw a FB post with a picture and a mention of his job that he thought made his job sound meaningless.  Would he yell and get pissed immediately or tell you calmly that the way it was phrased sounded like his job didn't matter?

I made the mistake of mentioning him on FB and he freaked.  I mean, pissed, yelling, retreated away from kids and I and now giving to total silent treatment.  I took the damn post down and apologized the first time he started yelling, telling him that I didn't intend for it to offend, but he's all butt-hurt.  I really didn't intend to offend, I just think it's cool that his job has to do with making sure beer is carbonated just right!?!

Does your DH ever act like that?  So pissed at his reaction right now. 

[Might DD later, please don't quote.]

[wrathofkuus]

No... but he was yelling and throwing things about an hour ago after the Pens lost, as though they'd personally wronged him by not winning. Kirk wasn't this upset with Khan in The Wrath of Khan.

[ChillyMcFreeze]

We all have bad days. DH is more the silent assy type when he gets pissy, but I do the hysterics thing like your H did when just the right button gets pushed. If it's a rare occurrence, I'd chalk it up to the occasional sucky day.

[ijack]

It takes a lot for H to blow his top, but when he does watch out!
That said, I saw the post and my thought was "what a cool job!"

[kmpls]

Yes, my h is an ass. 

Sorry you have to deal with that.

[sushi]

He probably could get justifiably angrier much more often. So, no, that's not his style. He really only gets angry when driving.

But I think that level of anger for that trigger is entirely uncalled for. He'd be in serious shit with me until a deep heartfelt apology. Yes, everyone has bad days, and I'd forgive, but I'd make it clear that's unacceptable in my world.

[Deleted]

Jun 7, 2013 22:25:40 GMT -5 wrathofkuus said:

No... but he was yelling and throwing things about an hour ago after the Pens lost, as though they'd personally wronged him by not winning. Kirk wasn't this upset with Khan in The Wrath of Khan.

That's Pittsburgh sports fans for ya.

Mine got pissy once when he discovered me and another woman talking about our husbands at a party. I wasn't shittalking, just shooting the breeze about my H like women do. He was all "I can't BELIEVE you were TALKING about me!!!"

[pescalita]

MrP gets upset about things I have no idea will bother him sometimes. He then gets upset that I didn't think it would bother him. But he doesn't yell and he doesn't do silent. I'm the silent assy one, but I've learned it's not acceptable behavior towards my spouse, so I cut it out.

[Deleted]

If DH feels like he's going to blow his top, he goes for a walk or a drive until he has cooled off. That hasn't happened in years though.

[camelblossom]

H and I are both pretty fiery and quick to anger. He can be a horse's ass sometimes but I give it as good as I get it.

sent from my galaxy s3. suck it, iphone haters.

[IIOY]

My H yells when debating his dad about religious and political stuff, mostly because my FIL is an ignorant asshole who is stuck in the 1950s in almost all respects.

As for arguments with me, H is more the silent stewing type, and after 8+ years of marriage, I still can't predict what will set him off. Example: we just had 24 hours of hard rain and got what I think is probably a roof leak. H is OOT and I was certain I was going to get a whiny, "why does expensive shit always break I don't want to spend money to fix the roof OMGWTF?!?" response when we talked. Instead his primary concern was that I not get upset or worry because this is no big deal, it can be fixed, and this is why we have an emergency fund.

IME both personally and professionally, women get a bad rap because it's actually men who are moody as fuck.

[eclaires]

He sounds like he's a little insecure. I could be wrong but iirc you have a good job and are pretty smart? Maybe he feels inferior and is thinking you feel that way too.

Anyway, my husband is not a volatile personality - I'm the one who is like that - but he can be moody especially if he is stressed. He can be kind of an ass then in that he will be kind of short and easily irritated but won't talk about what is really bothering him. (Usually work stress)

[Deleted]

H does get mad if he thinks I am belittling him, which I have to try hard not to do because our definition of "belittling" is different (I'll think I'm teasing and giving him a hard time but it's NBD and he takes it a lot more personally than that). so I have had to sort of scale back there. Depending on the specific post, I can see H being offended if I indicated to FB that his job wasn't really important and was pretty easy or whatever.

But even with that, if he reacted the way you are describing, I'd be really pissed.

[Deleted]

I always get quieter the angrier I get. Except with printers. Those fucking machines have to die.

[Deleted]

Sure.

I kind of do the same thing. The kids are the cause of 99% of our stress, but since we can't tell them to fuck off, we pick fights with each other over stupid stuff. Not often, but it happens.

Hope it blows over soon.

[isabel]

Jun 8, 2013 6:08:46 GMT -5 IIOY said:

IME both personally and professionally, women get a bad rap because it's actually men who are moody as fuck.

Oh my God. Yes. Seriously.

[cookiemdough]

Is your husband ever an ass?

Yes.

[pixy0stix]

Recently my husband saw a vent about him (which honestly I hardly ever do) in another group. He retreated, became distant, and then mentioned that he had saw it (I'd left the browser and window open to that post, doh!) and that he was hurt.

He keeps bringing it up several weeks later, "Did you tell your girls that I wasn't as bad as you made me seem?" ::big fat eyeroll::

FTR, I did go back and clarify that I was just frustrated and it wasn't that bad.

Long winded answer to yes, my dh has been an ass over things. BUT, if I'm honest, I tend to be assier.

[jillboston]

Jun 7, 2013 22:25:40 GMT -5 wrathofkuus said:

No... but he was yelling and throwing things about an hour ago after the Pens lost, as though they'd personally wronged him by not winning. Kirk wasn't this upset with Khan in The Wrath of Khan.

My sympathies Kuus. But the same game is making Mr. Jill the jolliest he's been in months. And he's usually is pretty happy -except when he is a moody PIA. Which also happens.

[pamela]

Jun 8, 2013 6:08:46 GMT -5 IIOY said:

IME both personally and professionally, women get a bad rap because it's actually men who are moody as fuck.

I agree. I feel like I can much better predict the response of most women I work with. It's the men however who will completely go off the deep end unexpectedly about something, or (appear to) be totally ok with something that I expected to get thoroughly chewed out for.

My husband really doesn't get worked up about too much. Really the only thing he seems to get upset about is me getting upset about something that he just doesn't care about.

[ringstrue]

If DH got that bad about job snark I'd assume it was because he was facing a lot of issues at work and feeling defensive about it in general. I'd probably talk to him later after he has cooled down some.

I'd say we all have times when we unexpectedly take more offense to something we haven't before.

[Deleted]

Jun 8, 2013 11:22:35 GMT -5 @blessed said:

Jun 8, 2013 6:08:46 GMT -5 IIOY said:

IME both personally and professionally, women get a bad rap because it's actually men who are moody as fuck.

Agree!!!!

I kind of agree - I know the wife is calmer than me. But I think men and women both get like this, but men seem to get a free pass when they shouldn't. 

More bluntly, some people are moody, some aren't, and the sex of the person is irrelevant.

[cookiemdough]

Isn't everyone moody at times? Or an ass at times? This post is perplexing me lol.

[heyjude]

We all have off days.

Somedays I think I have two toddlers.

[ttt]

Anyone who says their husband is never an ass about anything, ever, is lying.

Everyone has certain subjects/topics/areas that they're particularly sensitive or touchy about, sometimes rationally, sometimes not. It's just part of being human. That doesn't mean you aren't justified in getting angry and annoyed at him for getting irrationally upset about something, just that it's not a character flaw unique to your H.

[ringstrue]

DH. Used to give silent treatment real bad but he's a lot better. Now its usually only a few hours, lol