Random observation from my BMB this time and last

[sonrisa]

Why does it seem like many of the people who actually care about the sex of the baby are also the ones who go "team green"? So often the "I'd be disappointed by a ___" people aren't finding out. I don't get it. (I understanding team green, just not if you care deeply or want to decorate by gender). 

I really don't care. It won't affect how we shop or decorate since we keep it neutral. I couldn't use the pronoun "she" until about 6 months last time since babies are so genderless to me. But I'm finding out since chromosomes are set anyways. It isn't important but it also isn't changing.

[Deleted]

I think the logic is that once the baby is actually here, you won't be disappointed by its sex even if you really wanted the opposite because you'll be so in love with baby. Whereas at 20 weeks (or whenever) you don't know the baby and can only focus on the sex not being what you hoped for.

I needed to know to feel connected to both kids (I couldn't get excited about a nameless it) but given the small disappointment I felt at the thought of never having a daughter, I understand waiting. Once my first son arrived I couldn't care less that he wasn't a girl.

[KKD]

Jun 20, 2013 22:59:18 GMT -5 @thereigninglorelai said:

I think the logic is that once the baby is actually here, you won't be disappointed by its sex even if you really wanted the opposite because you'll be so in love with baby. Whereas at 20 weeks (or whenever) you don't know the baby and can only focus on the sex not being what you hoped for.

I would guess this is the reason too. I have two friends who were pregnant with their third after having two boys, and both really wanted a girl. One found out so she'd have time to get over her disappointment, but the other didn't and hoped that the excitement of the birth would outweigh any disappointment. Both ended up having girls.

The only pregnancy I really wanted one over the other was my second, and that's the reason I found out even though I said before I got pregnant that I wanted to keep it a surprise to make it a little more special. Once I was actually pregnant, I had a strong urge to find out if we were having a sister for Em and couldn't have waited that long. (We also found out my first pregnancy, but that was so we could better plan for it.)

I am team green for the first time this time, and while most people assume we want a boy, I really don't care either way. I love having girls and would love another but I also would like the experience of having a boy as well.

[irish]

Jun 20, 2013 22:59:18 GMT -5 @thereigninglorelai said:

I think the logic is that once the baby is actually here, you won't be disappointed by its sex even if you really wanted the opposite because you'll be so in love with baby. Whereas at 20 weeks (or whenever) you don't know the baby and can only focus on the sex not being what you hoped for.

I think this is the reason.  Woman in work was convinced before her scan that she was having a boy.  Found out it was a girl and she said it took her a few weeks to get over the disappointment of it.  She said if she only found out at birth that it was a girl she couldn't have cared less.

We are team green this time around, as we were last time.  To me/us it doesn't really matter as long as the baby is healthy.  Yes, I'm terrified if it was a boy because I see my friends with a boy same age as our dd and he doesn't ever sit still and you can't take your eyes off him even for a second.  N will happily play on her own, read, do jigsaws, colour on her own...  But then, it would be nice to have one of each...  Either way, I can't change it even if we did find out in advance.

[Velar Fricative]

Jun 20, 2013 22:59:18 GMT -5 @thereigninglorelai said:

I think the logic is that once the baby is actually here, you won't be disappointed by its sex even if you really wanted the opposite because you'll be so in love with baby. Whereas at 20 weeks (or whenever) you don't know the baby and can only focus on the sex not being what you hoped for.

Thats why H's cousin was recently team green. She really wanted a girl but had a boy. She said there was really no time to be disappointed and now she wouldn't have it any other way. But I think you have to know yourself well - some people would still rather find out early to eliminate any potential disappointment well before baby arrives.

I imagined myself going team green way before I got pregnant and I truly don't have a preference, which even surprises me since I thought I'd have a strong preference by the time I got pregnant. So I really don't care to find out until birth. A lot of people don't believe me though - they think I must have at least some preference. 

[Jalapeñomel]

Because the Bump sucks ass?

[blindyswife]

I think the other's answers are the only explanation. Cause I can't think of another one.

I'm team green, and truly don't have a preference either way. Honestly. I don't think people believe me sometimes when I say that, and assume because I have a boy already, that I want a girl. But I really don't care. Maybe that's what it's easy for me to be team green, because where others are all, "I need to know. I need to decorate the nursery", we're content with a neutral theme and neutral clothes.

[Velar Fricative]

Jun 21, 2013 9:52:22 GMT -5 sameoldash said:

i think i'm 99.9% sure i'll be hanging up my team green hat lol. i want gender neutral gear/nursery (gray) anyway, but all of a sudden i really want to know. i used to not care, but now i'm convinced it's a boy and i just need to KNOW. H always wanted to know, so he'll be pleased.

like, i want to know so badly right now, i'm tempted to schedule an elective sono. i am out of control!

I felt that way the day of my a/s - I was firmly teem green up until that point. I was DYING to know and I kept texting H the entire day leading up to the appointment because I kept going back and forth on whether to find out or not. H was insisting that we still not find out, and we were still discussing it in the waiting room. And yet, the moment I walked into the exam room...I didn't want to know. It was a bizarre feeling. So I believe no matter how indecisive you are now, you'll make up your mind in the u/s room.

[nadasteph]

I had a pretty strong preference on gender, which is why I chose to find out this time. I didn't want my reaction to be during a drug induced state of complete honesty. LOL.

[Jalapeñomel]

Before I was pregnant, I was going to be team green. But now that I am pregnant, I figure pregnancy and having a baby are big enough surprises, I don´t need another one, LOL.