My husband works out of state and I don't see him for weeks to months at a time. He did not have this job when we got married. I wouldn't have a problem with him being gone, except I'm pretty much a sexaholic. If I'm not getting laid I'm basically constantly stressed out and being a huge bitch to everyone so I recently started hooking up with an old fling of mine from before I was married. He knows I am married, but I told him my husband and I have an arrangement where I can have sex with other people while he's out of state as long as I'm discreet, use protection and he doesn't hear about it.
I do not plan on telling my husband I have a hot little piece on the side while he's away. I do not want to get a divorce.
I feel guilty that for the first time in months I'm happy again and our marriage is running more smoothly because of my infidelity. I feel guilty that I don't feel guilty for cheating on him.
It's basically a huge clusterfuck mess and I felt like I had to come clean to internet strangers.
Is that part true? Does your husband really know you get sex on the side? Or what that just a lie you told your bootycall to placate him?
You don't feel guilty because you've convinced yourself that your own needs are more important than your husband's trust in you and your promise of fidelity.
Well, I'm guessing your husband would see things differently.
I'm assuming that most couples who are in an open marriage at least knew going into it that it was something they wanted.
Not necessarily, but complete honesty between all parties is the most important element. Full stop. This may be an option for you, but right now your are demonstrating some serious issues with honesty, your husband will rightly have trust issues (presuming you actually man up and tell him what's up).
Post by PinkSquirrel on May 13, 2012 10:15:07 GMT -5
Um what? So, you would felt you would hurt your husband by asking him to quit his job when as a couple you could afford it, but you don't feel bad that your banging someone else on the side? You do realize how ass backwards that is right?
Post by coffeeismyfrienemy on May 13, 2012 10:40:16 GMT -5
What was the point of this post? It appears you're just telling your story rather than asking for advice, correct?
It sucks your H gets a cheating, lying wife for doing ajob he enjoys. You're an adult, control yourself. If you feel like you can't do the mature responsible thing and seek help, there's no justifying what you've been doing.
You really need to talk to your H about getting a different job for the sake of your marriage. Even if he loves it, I would venture to guess he loves you more.
I travel almost every week for work, and if I found out my H was doing that to me... I don't even know. As much as I hate being away all the time, I really like what I do. But if he asked me to look for something else because the traveling was a strain on our marriage, you better believe I'd be sending my resume out ASAP.