When you dont want to do something/go somewhere

[spedrunner]

Do you just decline "no thank you, i dont want to go to "So and so"

or do you find yourself making up little white lies ?  "I have a wedding that night, sorry"

Ive been getting REALLY good at just saying no lately, this was always tough for me

[jenna]

I used to tell a guy I was "crazy busy with work" to avoid telling him to his face I didn't want to go on a date. He was nice, and a friend-of-a-friend, so I didn't want to burn bridges.

[winnied]

I'm so bad at saying no. I try to just say "Oh, sorry! I can't make it." I'm so bad at this that I can't even recall what I said the last time someone asked what I was busy with. Apparently, most of my friends assume that H and I are always busy doing "cute couple things" so I don't get asked too many questions anyway.

[eb777888]

I'm a horrible overexplaining liar in these situations. H is always like "just decline! Don't lie about it because that sets you up for getting caught and you don't owe them an explanation..." Blab blah blah. Him and his logic.

[hisno1girl]

I decline with, "Thanks for the invite but I'm not available."

I don't give reasons and really don't tell lies because they have a way of biting you in the ass.

[alare]

I wuss out and end up going. Usually ready with the, "Sorry, already have plans" but am scared that people will ask, "oh, what are you doing that precludes you from taking part in this amazing activity I invited you to?"

I am a wimp.

[wildfloweragain]

I always have things going on, even if they do not directly conflict, time wise, so I mention that thing or say that we have so many things we are committed to already.

ETA:  DH"s work schedule is horrid, so I can always blame that, which is true.  People always want to do things that conflict with DD's nap or bed and if he is not home, that makes things hard. 

[Kit]

I need to work on this. I have a hard time saying no.

Sent from my SCH-R530U using proboards

[Muddled]

I just say no. I don't make excuses and I don't lie. I will say something vague like, it's not going to work out or I'm not available, but I generally don't feel I owe an explanation.

[viciouskittie]

I'm in the don't lie camp. It will definitely bite you in the ass if you do. If it's people I really like but an event I really don't want to attend, I just say "thanks for the invite, I/we won't be attending but we should get together soon!"

[Deleted]

"Sorry, I have other plans."

This is not a lie even if your plan is to sit at home and watch TV.

[iamgrace]

I don't lie. I just say I can't make it or whatever.

[ECB]

Have most of you found that people actually ask "what are you doing?"? I haven't. Usually when I just say "Oh- I'm sorry - I won't be able to make it", it's accepted with a "Oh- too bad. We'll miss you" and that's it.

Just like when people say no to us- I don't ask.

[bananapancakes]

This is definitely something I need to work on. I am terrible at saying no.

[BaliHai]

I usually say "I can't make it, sorry!" and, if it's over text, don't respond to any follow up questions. Maybe not super mature, but why does it matter what I'm doing instead? I can't make it, the end. If it's in person I just say "Oh, we have something going on that day" and leave it at that. I've never had anyone press me for further details.

[RoxMonster]

I think it depends what I'm getting out of and who it is. I will usually say, 'Sorry, we already have plans," even if those plans are sitting on my couch drinking wine and watching movies lol. Rarely do I make up an elaborate lie to get out of something.

[joshlyman]

Jul 8, 2013 16:46:44 GMT -5 spedrunner said:

Do you just decline "no thank you, i dont want to go to "So and so"

or do you find yourself making up little white lies ?  "I have a wedding that night, sorry"

Ive been getting REALLY good at just saying no lately, this was always tough for me

I have a hard time saying no - I'm working on it. Right now I ether overextend myself or white lie it too often.

[10nille]

A simple no thanks works better than a white lie or a long drawn out excuse. It does take some practice, but it gets easier and it's such a relief when it comes second nature. People probably care more if you are coming than why you aren't available.

[bania]

Jul 8, 2013 16:50:21 GMT -5 hisno1girl said:

I decline with, "Thanks for the invite but I'm not available."

I don't give reasons and really don't tell lies because they have a way of biting you in the ass.

So much easier! I just used this, this afternoon! I am an over explainer so this was much better.

[birdistheword]

It depends who I'm talking to. With certain friends, I can just say I can't make it or that I don't want to attend, whatever. But I have certain people in my life who will not take no for an answer and will badger you to death if you do not produce a legitimate excuse for not going to something. "I don't want to" is unacceptable to them. I lie to those people.